Ownit! Powercast

Welcome to episode Twenty-Eight, the first of the new year, where we describe what energy drainers are, and the impact they have on our well-being. In this episode we explore the concept of energy drainers – all the things you tolerate and/or don't face, even though you want to. What we do know is that not addressing them lowers your self-esteem, can create stress that can cause illness, and gener...

Welcome to episode Twenty-Seven where we close out the year (and the decade!) with a year-end reflection and gentle goal setting episode. Join us as do a balanced and loving self-assessment so we can clear the slate for 2020! In this episode we get honest about where we've been, what we've tackled, how we feel about that and where we want to go from here. We dive a bit deep into a year-end gap ana...

Welcome to episode Twenty-Six where we wrap up the month on assertiveness. Here we explore some of the obstacles and setbacks that we can encounter when we work on becoming more assertive. In this episode it's all about the things that can pop up when you are working on assertiveness. It's often awkward and frustrating, and yet each time you experience being more open and honest, you learn! If you...

Welcome to episode Twenty-Five where we describe the How in assertiveness – Using your actual voice. In this episode we first identify how important tone and the quality of your voice really matters when it comes to connecting with others while holding onto yourself. We compare and contrast different ways to speak to convey what you really mean to say. Define emotional congruence and why it's so i...

Welcome to episode Twenty-Four as we explore what healthy assertiveness truly looks like. In this episode we talk about what it really means to be assertive and get into the nitty gritty of how to actually do it with kindness and confidence! Being assertive means being grounded, peaceful and emotionally honest. If you struggle with knowing just "how" to do it, this episode is a great intro! Key El...

Welcome to episode Twenty-Three where we clarify the concept of assertiveness and talk about what it is not. In this episode we explore the origins of losing our "voice" in relationships and in your life, by going back to the formative years where unhealthy behavior was modeled for us and instilled in us. We delve into the origins of how early coping mechanisms of aggressive or passive-aggressive...

Welcome to Episode 22 where we delve into about what it means to take responsibility for your truth. We talk about how crucial self-responsibility is for our self-esteem.   We identify what happens when we give our power away by abdicating that responsibility because we are afraid, and ways we can begin to take care of ourselves by taking even small steps toward ownership. And we realize this is a...

In Episode 21 the focus is on defining your Truth…what defines who you are and what you stand for. In this episode, after learning last week how negative messages can create limiting core beliefs, we talk about how to instead define your real truth. Getting solid can require some serious soul searching and soul owning as we regain the authentic self. It also can entail getting some truth straight...

Welcome to episode twenty where we explore how early messages about ourselves helped form core beliefs that have been driving our choices and behavior. In this episode I explain how the early messages you received – both positive and negative – helped to form your self-concept. We process the deep impacts of these messages and begin to decipher what they "really" mean, and how you may have applied...

Welcome to episode Nineteen, as we explore the idea of self-concept and how it is formed early in life. In this episode we talk about the origins of our self-concept in childhood, and how the emotional safety of the family is crucial for healthy self-esteem in a child. We talk about verbal abuse and control, and how we can slowly lose ourselves. This episode is a first in our month-long series of...

Welcome to episode Eighteen where we wrap up the conversation around boundaries by exploring just how to set and maintain them. In this episode we get into the nuts and bolts of how to articulate your boundaries in a healthy way, and the things to think about before you set them. We also explore the idea of following through and maintaining them. This episode builds on some of the previous ones su...

Welcome to episode Seventeen where we talk about boundaries in our behavior and compare healthy versus unhealthy ways of acting.   In this episode I talk about boundaries in our behavior – how we act, what is healthy and what's not and why, so you can explore where you think you are (and of course others around you) and have a better understanding of why looking at behavior through the lens of bou...

Welcome to episode Sixteen where we explore the idea of Boundaries in our communication – because how we speak to one another is how we demonstrate healthy boundaries or not. In this episode I get into one of my favorite topics: Healthy Communication.   I think our communication can make a relationship emotionally safe and trusting, or not.   Since connection is not possible without open, vulnerab...

Welcome to episode Fifteen, where we explore the concept of Internal Boundaries – or Self Discipline.   We talk about why this is the "Internal Half" of boundary work, and give you some tools to get started. In this episode I get into the importance of getting out of the Prison of Perfection that immobilizes you, and taking steps to create Good Enough and Better choices for your self-discipline.  ...

W elcome to episode fourteen where we get into what manipulation and control look like, their destructiveness in relationships, and how they relate to healthy boundary setting.   I believe manipulation is one of the most toxic behaviors in a relationship because you cannot feel emotionally safe or have trust when there is manipulation.   It is dishonest and often invisible at first, so it can be s...

Welcome to episode thirteen, where we explore the concept of griefwork when setting boundaries in relationships. Being able to detach and grief is essential to have hope and healing.     This work can be quite challenging at times, especially when the stakes are high, such as a partnership, a marriage or family member.   Because setting limits creates healthy separateness, surrendering to the real...

In this episode we focus on what loving detachment is, what it isn't, and how it is so integral to setting and maintaining healthy boundaries in relationships.   Letting go is not easy, yet it is the only way to find peace in your relationships.   If you struggle to not be "so involved" in what others are doing (or not doing!) and it's making   you nuts, this is the perfect episode for you. Key El...

Welcome to episode Eleven, where we look at some of the symptoms you may struggle with if you have poor boundaries. This is an important episode for you if you are tired if feeling worn-out, frustrated and just plain tired of all the drama in your life. Most situations can be drilled down to a boundary issue or two. Sometimes we have to begin with what we don't want in our life to determine the he...

Wow we're at episode ten and starting out the month defining the concept of boundaries, one of my favorite topics! Boundaries are the underpinning of empowerment, and healthy relationships are not possible without them. In this episode I roll out the concept of healthy boundaries and why they are so important to self-confidence and healthy relationships. Since it such a huge topic with so many lay...

EP 009 Taking Responsibility for Getting Needs Met Welcome to our ninth episode, where we finish up our month talking about taking full responsibility for what we need – and for practicing self-care.   I n this episode we explore the many areas where we need to take ownership, and ways to begin looking at some of the obstacles to doing so. One of the biggest ones can be ourselves! Convincing yours...

We have two types of needs: tangible and intangible ones. Learning to identify, validate and express those needs in a healthy way to others is our main focus here. If we cannot do this naturally there are very good reasons for that – ones we explore in episodes six and seven. We talk about the need to apply the self-discipline to identify where we struggle and begin to practice being more emotiona...

Welcome to episode seven where we delve into the concept of unmet needs. Here we look at why some of our needs were not met and the impacts on our lives today.   The earlier these experiences took place the more ingrained the disowning becomes, and disowning our needs is disowning our authentic self. Key Elements ·        Identify some of the insidious ways emotional needs go unmet ·        Explor...

Welcome to episode six where we start the new month talking about one of the most important aspects of self-confidence and healthy relationships: Needs. Here we define them and explore why they matter so much. They are needs NOT wants or desires and we look at what Abraham Maslow has to say about the actual hierarchy of needs and his theory of human motivation.  I know that working with people for...

Welcome to episode five where we dig into the ideas of responsibility and commitment to yourself as you set out to become who you truly want to be.   We identify ways we can allow others to hold us back, and even how we can get in our own way.   Mary provides another experiential way to visualize this process and provides the segue into future episodes regarding needs and boundaries.    Key Elemen...

This episode is all about wrapping up the idea of empowerment with defining the gap between the person you want to be and how you see yourself today.   We get into the relationship between you and yourself…and how ultimately it's not about anyone else.   Being authentic means being vulnerable, taking risks of putting or real self out there despite of our fear, rather than hiding from all or parts...