No More Desire ™ Porn Addiction Recovery

So, you’re walking down the street, minding your own business, when BAM a girl walks by in a skimpy outfit. Thoughts of lust, fantasizing, and craving are running through your mind.  Or, let’s say, you’re browsing online, minding your own business, when BOOM some ad pops up of women in swimsuits.  You’re triggered. And these triggers have started you down the path to eventually acting out with por...

It can be so hard to know how to help someone with a porn addiction.  We worry deeply for our loved ones. We try so, so hard to “knock some sense into them”; to tell them to get help, or to try and help them ourselves.  We talk and talk and talk until we’re blue in the face, attempting to get through. Sometimes, our spouse or child will have moments of clarity, knowing they need help to quit porn....

Do you ever wonder why you get sucked into porn addiction and everything else seems to disappear? You have a million important reasons for quitting porn, but when you get stressed you seem to enter this "funnel" that you can't see outside. It feels almost inevitable that you'll give in.  I remember exactly how that was. I dealt with this habit for over 10 years, and it seemed i...

So you’ve got this monkey on your back. It keeps interrupting your life. You’ve been taught some mental habits to quit porn, but none of them seem to help.  You’re tired of being addicted to porn. It increases your anxiety, it decreases your ability to connect with others, you feel more depressed, you don’t feel as motivated or driven. It’s sucking your potential away from you.  You keep thinking...

Today I want to talk about a lie that we're told about porn addiction. We're often told that addiction is just a bad habit, that we need to abstain from it, get over our impulsivity, and just say no to the cravings and urges. But let me tell you, that's a bunch of crap. Overcoming porn addiction isn't just about saying no to the habit; it's about developing a new mindset a...

How can feeling bad about porn addiction make you more likely to seek it out? Do you ever wonder how you could possibly want to stop watching porn so bad, yet the worse you feel about it the more you seem to “want” it? Does it seem strange that you could feel so negative about something, and yet crave the heck out of it at the same time?  You think, “there must be something wrong with me. Otherwis...

Porn addiction is a struggle for many today. Finding ways to break free of porn can feel confusing and overwhelming, as we aren’t sure where to start.  One method of overcoming addiction that is gaining traction is nutrition. In episode 47 of No More Desire, hosted by me (Jake Kastleman), we turn the spotlight to the intersection of nutrition, mental health, and addiction recovery.  Jordan Gunders...

I recently received this question from one of my listeners: “I’m trying to break free from porn. What are some key things I can do throughout the day so that when it comes to the time I get home I’m not tempted beyond what I can handle? I know the Bible says that I will never be tempted beyond what I can bear but sometimes I feel like I can’t beat it...” I LOVE this question!  There are so many am...

Do you wish you felt in control? Are you tired of experiencing porn cravings everyday? Today, we’re going to talk about how to stop cravings and fantasizing so you can overcome porn addiction for good. I remember what it felt like dealing with non-stop cravings and wondering if I’d ever get better. I remember feeling out of control and hopeless.  Now, after 9 years of sobriety, and helping others...

Today, I’m going to teach you why porn addiction destroys motivation, and what you can do about it.  During the decade I struggled with addictions to porn and masturbation, I constantly regretted how I was squandering my potential. I felt like the times I was clean of porn I could do pretty well in life - I was productive in school, at work, my relationships were better, I was friendlier.  But dur...

One of the main reasons that we struggle with porn addiction is we have not yet learned how to manage stress effectively.  Managing stress is not an easy task, especially with how many challenging emotions and decisions face us today.  Most people are more stressed than they’ve ever been, with the political, economic, and societal context.  But all this does not need to lead to addiction. Rather t...

Are you trying to quit porn for yourself, or for others?  Should you be motivated to stop watching porn for your spouse? Your kids? For another family member or a friend?  Sometimes we addicts can rely heavily upon others - to an unhealthy extent. Or, we can completely isolate ourselves, trying to do everything on our own.  When it comes to our attitude and outlook, it is important we get one thin...

How can the teachings of the Stoics help us overcome porn addiction? Stoicism is a moral philosophy for how to live a good life. Sometimes we make the mistake of believing stoicism is all about being serious and having no emotion. Being “stoic”, right? This has little to do with what Stoicism actually is.  We also make the assumption that stoicism, as a philosophy, is irreligious. But this is not...

When you slip up with porn addiction, are you able to bounce back? Or do you spiral? Is a slip a learning experience for you? Or does it come out of nowhere and you have no clue how to prevent it in the future?  Today, I’ll give you the formula for turning a slip or relapse - what can be a hopeless, negative experience - into a springboard for recovery. So you can use it to actually help you get c...

Do you have an issue with porn addiction and video game addiction?  If so, you’re not alone, my friend. I used to have both of these addictions, and I’ve known many men (and some women) who have struggled with these as well.  Video games and porn go hand-in-hand.  And I’m not talking about the simple fact that video games have sexual content in them sometimes - perfect, animated women that defy re...

Do you ever feel high-strung? Do you ever have spinning or obsessive thoughts? Do you ever feel unable to quiet your mind and just relax?  To overcome porn addiction, we need to learn to “take it easy”. But what does that even mean? How do we do that, and how does it help with porn addiction?  Listen to today’s episode to find out. For those who feel like they have a non-stop mind that never quiet...

Do you have incessant cravings for porn lately? In this episode, you'll learn 3 Mindset Strategies to Beat Porn Addiction. Do you feel like once you’ve started craving you have no choice but to give in to porn addiction eventually? Even if you make it a day, a week, or a month, does failure seem inevitable? You want to stop so bad, but you’ve lost hope. I felt this way for years. Once momentu...

How do I come out of an argument with my spouse and NOT relapse? For many of the men that I’ve spoken to, they can get really triggered to go to their porn addiction after an argument or a fight with their spouse. It’s super common.  Today, I want to talk about why fights or arguments can be so triggering for us to go look at porn - leading to slips and relapses - and how we can better handle the...

Do you feel like the holidays should be a happy time, but for you it’s a really triggering time for your addiction?  Do you feel like the winter drives you to engage with your pornography addiction or another addiction more, and that cravings are worse during the winter?  We’re going to talk about these things today, and some strategies you can use to stay clean and sober during the holidays, to o...

When porn cravings hit, what do you do? Do you fight the porn addiction? Resist it? Try to just not think about it and distract yourself?  I’m here to tell you that none of these options work. At least not long-term. Willpower is finite. It runs out. To overcome porn addiction requires a completely different approach.  So what can you do instead? Today I’m going to give you 4 Simple Practices you...

What does God think of porn addicts?  As someone who struggles with porn addiction, do you ever feel like God is punishing you for your mistakes? Do you feel like He looks down on you?  You aren’t alone in these feelings. Pretty much every addict goes through them. Pretty much EVERY PERSON goes through them.   When we can’t quit porn, we often believe that God condemns us for the sin. That God wan...

You’ve probably heard that mindfulness helps with addiction - being present, enjoying the moment, getting in tune with your senses.  But you’ve probably found it difficult to implement mindfulness in your daily life, and fail to see how using mindfulness to overcome addiction really works. I get that. Today, I’m going to talk about discoveries that I’ve made about mindfulness for recovery, as well...

In this episode from the No More Desire Podcast, my friend John Canaan and I talk about overcoming the desire to control; putting aside the ego to improve marriage and relationships, overcome addictions, and just live an overall more excellent life! John hits the nail on the head, talking about specific methods to heal marriage and relationships, helping you remove ego and put your spouse first. J...

I was talking with a friend of mine the other day - a fellow recovering addict - and I was sharing about my past with addiction and how social anxiety was a big struggle in my life and actually fueled my addiction - in other words, I went to addiction in order to cope with the immense amount of nervousness and fear I felt in relationships and social situations.  I told this friend that I had some...

How do we lose the desire for addiction? Is it possible?  During the decade I spent addicted to porn, I dreamed of a day I could finally be free of the chains of addiction. That I could finally have my confidence around women back That I could finally be free of the social anxiety I suffered with That I could finally have my motivation and drive back that pornography addiction, alcohol, and drugs...