New Life Live

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Jim discusses what deconstruction is and how his newest book, When Your Adult Child Strays: Trading Heartache for Hope , explores this difficult topic in greater depth. How do I love my wife when I feel no attraction or emotional connection to her? I also struggle with respect because we seem very different in intelligence and humor. I was sexually abused by...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Chris confesses he can be very obstinate and prideful when it comes to submission. We have to face that submission is not an option; use resistance as a pathway to what needs to be submitted to God. What do you do when an employee doesn’t submit to their boss because they believe the Lord told them to do something else? We are in our sixties; is it normal f...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Becky discusses neuroplasticity and how God designed our brains to change and grow. Our brains form neuropathways, and over time, habits become part of who we are. However, real transformation is possible—you can change the way your brain works through doing things like habit stacking. I wanted to talk to my girlfriend’s son about Christ before he died of cancer,...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Jill talks about what relational confirmation bias is—for example, when we’re always looking for what we fear. When we do that, we create algorithms that help to reinforce it. My husband is a farmer, and I have an outside job. It’s getting to be too much, and I’m finding my family is dysfunctional; what can I do? How do I navigate my 4-year-old da...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Marc explains the difference between change and growth. While we can change external circumstances like jobs or relationships, real transformation happens through internal growth—otherwise the same patterns often remain. How do I handle my estranged 28-year-old son? He’s always had a difficult relationship with my husband and cut off most of the family except me....

Caller Questions & Discussion: Chris discusses having a high-maintenance internal world and how showing up well requires intentional effort rather than entitlement, beginning each day by releasing anxiety to God. How do I establish the right boundaries with my 25-year-old daughter? She’s finishing her master’s degree but takes her frustrations out on me. I feel bad when I block my meth-addicte...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Alice shares that over 77 percent of those who work in the sex industry were sexually abused in the past. If we are consuming pornography, are we participating in the abuse of those we are watching? Our daughter is getting married this weekend and it might be the last chance for full family photos because my husband has cancer. Our two sons will be there, but...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Sherri explains what a “traumaberg” is and how trauma is like an iceberg. The iceberg shows our behaviors, but underneath the surface is the trauma that happened in our past. I’ve been struggling with lust and masturbation for the last 6 years, and a man from church has asked me to be his girlfriend. Is it okay for me to start a relationship? I used to strugg...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Jill discusses suffering. Pain is God’s megaphone to get our attention. Are you going to allow your suffering to produce character growth? Are you going to be bitter and beaten down about suffering or use it to get better? My close friend’s daughter committed suicide and my son even expressed thoughts of suicide in the past; how do I help my frien...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Becky discusses the big lie that “time heals all wounds” and explains why untreated pain can continue to harm us over time. Can you give me guidance? My 25-year-old daughter has Bipolar Disorder and recently moved back home because she’s been unable to maintain employment. Should I tell my adult son he is giving the appearance of evil? He met a woman 20 years you...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Jill discusses steps toward radical acceptance. While we often want to avoid sitting with difficult emotions or thinking about painful situations, doing so can be an important path toward achieving radical acceptance and emotional healing. I’ve had one session with a therapist, and she used a subconscious imprinting technique in our work. Have you heard of th...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Jim explains that when confronting someone—especially an adult child or a family member—we need to remain the calmest person in the room to have healthy, productive conversations. What can I do about my sister, who has guardianship of a child and two seniors, including my mom, but is excluding them from the rest of the family? Should I move my sister back in...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Jacqui reminds us that so many people are living stressful lives because they’re confining themselves to a box that God never intended for them to stay in. Live in the space of freedom that Jesus came to allow for us. I have complex PTSD and I’m an introvert; do I need a coach or counselor as we head into retirement and move to another state? When you g...

Caller Questions & Discussion: JJ discusses that if you are experiencing loneliness and isolation, you should ask yourself: “Am I making the effort to reach beyond my comfort circle?” How do I detach—but still support—my 45-year-old daughter and my 2-year-old grandson who may be on the autism spectrum? My daughter and her husband are demanding support, including asking us to let them stay with...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Marc shares five practical ways parents can stay connected and set healthy boundaries with their adult children—even when those children are making unhealthy or destructive choices. I have a family member who has no filter, and I feel constantly disrespected and judged. Should I confront them? My husband’s niece stopped talking to him two years ago and is now cri...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Alice explains how you can choose today to start divorce-proofing your marriage and shares practical tips to strengthen your relationship. Is it acceptable for me to move forward with a divorced woman who is the mother of my kids? I’m a new Christian, reading through the Bible, and wondering what it says about divorce and remarriage. I was an alcoholic, but n...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Alice shares the promise that “God sets the lonely in families” (Psalm 68:6).  If you struggle with loneliness or being a people-pleaser, remember to HALT: don’t get too hungry, angry, lonely, or tired. I’ve been a pastor’s wife for 32 years, and my gift is hosting events. Some people say I’m too much. How can I clear this hurdle? My extended fami...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Jacqui discusses the importance of developing a growth mindset instead of a fixed mindset. She shares how she used to say, “I don’t play sports because I’m not good at it,” but now approaches challenges with a growth mindset: “Let’s see what went wrong so I can learn from it and try something different.” Why have I replaced drugs and alcohol with emotio...

Caller Questions & Discussion: JJ shares about a critical email he recently received that left him feeling disappointed. Those who struggle with an avoidant attachment style must be careful not to let criticism draw them back into unhealthy patterns. What do I do about all the confusing things I’ve been through? My wife had bipolar disorder, and one day she was cleaning a gun and pointed it at...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Marc shares how, during a counseling session, he suddenly experienced intense pain and had to be rushed to the emergency room. In the same way, real growth in life often comes when we’re willing to face painful or difficult situations head-on. I’m 70 and have been struggling with major depression for months after multiple surgeries. I’m in my third marriage and a...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Jill reflects on the meaning of Good Friday and why it’s called “good.” Our sin is deeper than we often realize, but God’s mercy, grace, and forgiveness are greater than we could ever imagine. My fiancée has asked for more time before we get married—how do I navigate relationship uncertainty and emotional stress? Our son and daughter-in-law have cut off all c...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Sheri explains how the process of healing after trauma can feel like a lobster in the ocean—protected by a thick shell we develop after being hurt. I lost my husband in February after he suffered for years following a car accident, and I’m struggling to cope with grief. Should I consider surgery for ongoing issues with my eyes? I’ve had surgery before, but it...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Becky discusses “Spy Wednesday” when Judas sold out Jesus for 30 pieces of silver. We have betrayed Jesus by going our own way. During Holy Week, let us dismantle everything that isn’t about eternal things. My husband of 39 years left me and gave me the responsibility of selling our home. How do I deal with the anger and resentment? I was put ou...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Becky discusses the Garden of Gethsemane and how Christ knew the suffering that was ahead of Him. In this world, you will face struggles. But as Christ prayed for the cup of suffering to be taken from Him, He said, “Not my will, but yours be done.” If pastors made themselves more vulnerable, would it help with church attendance? I brought someone to church, and h...

Caller Questions & Discussion: Dr. Jill asks the question: How do we do end of life well? In the last few years, Dr. Jill has experienced close friends and family members who have passed away or are on the verge of passing away. She’s seen how there’s avoidance until you can no longer avoid. What then? You have to lean in and show up. When people finally face what’s happening, God shows up. My...