Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships

This is a big question that comes up in non-monogamy, especially when it comes to talking about other partners to one another. So what is the difference between privacy and secrecy. Is there really anything that we should be hiding from our partner? What about power dynamics. Who decides what should be private and what shouldn’t be? What is mine to share? We talk about mental health, STI status, p...

Millennials don’t do labels these days or do they? Some folks despise labels while others live and die by them. Today we describe labeling the holy trinity - Sexuality, Gender and Relationship Styles. We describe our experiences and difficulties with labeling our own individual selves and how those labels have changed or even evolved over time. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory...

Let's chat about the acronym HALT, which stands for - Hungry Angry Lonely or Tired. We also like to include horny, drinking and sick to the mix but HHALTDS just doesn't have the same ring to it. This acronym is used often in addiciton recovery to encourage an addict to check in with themselves and see what is causing their urge to use. We also like to use it for relationship checkins AND actually...

Commitment is so often misunderstood when it comes to non-monogamy. We discuss definitions of commitment and identifying the traditional markers of commitment we've all grown up with. We realize that it can be difficult defining what it means exactly within the confines of non-monogamy as it doesn't necessarily fit the stereotypical mold (but that is nothing new!). Infidelity seems to be the final...

So what exactly is emotional support. How do you ask for it? How do you go about learning what kind of emotional support that you need. What kind does your partner need? Even not knowing what kind of support you need in the moment and admitting it can go a long way! On this episode, we explore what emotional support is, what it is not and learning what you need emotionally from a partner. We even...

Jealousy happens in all types of relationships, but what is the science behind why we respond with jealousy to certain situations. What happens inside our bodies and minds in response things that make us feel jealousy. On this episode, we explore the scientific why behind jealousy and some ways to combat that internal struggle. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.supercast.com. W...

Are you suffering from a Monogamy Hangover? We'll give you a dose of medicine to help cure what ails you. Many of us have been given a set of relationship expectations growing up and with changing those expectations, some pieces of those old beliefs and expectations are still left over. On this episode, we talk about some of the topics that can affect non-monogamous relationships when you or your...

RelationshipGoals - No, we're not chatting about the infamous Instagram hashtag. On this episode, we take a trip on the relationship escalator. What does your relationship escalator look like? Does it match your partner's? What happens when you aren't sure? Do those expectations ever change? Sometimes we think we have certain expectations, achieve them and realize it wasn't what we wanted at all....

Get ready for the travel metaphors! They will be plentiful! We've covered this before in a previous episode, but we think it's time to tackle this subject again. In this episode, we talk about baggage, but not neccessarily all the bad stuff. We talk about evaluating your own personal baggage and what you bring to a relationship. Are you carrying around past experiences that are influencing your fu...

What does Sex Positivity and Sex Negativity actually mean? There is a lot of confusion surrounding these terms. People have a tendancy to throw these terms around with little to no explanation which just seems to add to the confusion. On this episode, we attempt to help define these two terms as best as we can while identifying the potential problems with each definition. We also discuss some of t...

Conflict is inevitable, but conflict can be productive. Everyone gets into fights and arguments but that doesn't mean your relationship is unhealthy or in trouble. On this episode, we talk about fighting fair instead of fighting dirty. Some of us fight with the misconception that we MUST win the fight to succeed. Sometimes we fight for no good reason at all. We take off the boxing gloves and talk...

Are you currently living together? Thinking about moving in? Why do you want to move in together? On this episode, we tackle some of the situations & questions that arise when cohabitation is on the table as well as statistics about living together for couples. We cover questions to ask yourself, actionable items to make your living situation great and cover special considerations for living harmo...

Failure is always an option, but it doesn't have to be the end of the world. We hear about failure quite a bit when it comes to schooling and even jobs/career but failure doesn't always get talked about in regard to relationships. It seems to be a dirty word when it comes to relationships because folks can feel ashamed or don't want to drudge up the past. Failure can be scary but avoiding it altog...

Listen all ya'll, it's a sabotage! Okay this episode isn't really about the famous Beastie Boy song, it's about something much more serious. Self-Sabotage can be a vicious cycle. On this episode, we tackle self-Sabotage in relationships and in life. Procrastination, addiction, self-worth issues and so much more. We also provide some insight on how to recognize when it's happening and stop the cycl...

What exactly IS attraction? How important is attraction? Why are we attracted to certain people or attributes? There are a lot of myths and misconceptions floating around out there. On this episode, we tackle what attraction is, how it affects who we choose as partners and even how attraction is related to sex drive. We look into the research and you might be surprised by what we uncovered. Join o...

Anger is usually viewed as bad or something that should be stifled from a very young age. However, anger can be a force for good too! A lot of folks tend to repress their anger or express it in unhealthy ways. In this episode, we cover how to use your anger in a more positive and constructive way in your relationships. We share some of the ways we've expressed and handled anger in the past and pro...

What happens when you don't get along with your metamours? Or perhaps one of your metamours doesn't like you and you feel stuck in the middle. Today, we cover some of the struggles you might face in your polyamorous relationship(s). Things won't always go perfect, so we cover ways on how to properly deal with them and communicate with your partner about it too. Join our amazing community of listen...

Today we tackle insecurities. Insecurities tend to affect our relationships and ultimately overall our happiness. We open up and share some of our own personal insecurities that we are currently dealing with. But don't fret, we provide ways to alleviate those insecurities while still maintaining your sense of humility and not compromising boundaries. Join our amazing community of listeners at mult...

We speak to Kevin Patterson & Alana Phelan author's of For Hire: Operator. The book is an all encompassing love story and super hero novel all wrapped into one. 2 women of color with super human powers whose story touches on subjects on consent, polyamory, gender-non-conformity, safe sex practices, sex clubs and more! These super heroes want to help their communities while pushing back against tod...

Is anyone really ever ready? This week we delve into the different signs that determine if you are ready to become polyamorous...or not. We talk about personal attributes that are helpful to have when beginning a new relationship style, red flags to watch out for when you are starting out, and our own personal experiences when we first became polyamorous. Join our amazing community of listeners at...

It's Multiamory's milestone 200th episode! We take part in a veritable retrospective hootenanny - sharing which tools, research, and lessons from creating the show that have had the most long lasting effects on our relationships and ourselves. Turns out that talking about sex, relationships, and communication every week for 200 weeks has some interesting outcomes! Join our amazing community of lis...

This week we're joined by transgender rights activist and YouTube sensation Kat Blaque. We talk about outness and visibility, handling criticism and backlash online, worthiness in relationships, and navigating polyamorous dating while trans and black. You can find Kat's youtube channel at youtube.com/katblaque and her new blog on polyamory at agirlnamedkathryn.com. Join our amazing community of li...

We all experience loss - the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, being let go from a job. This week we discuss helping a partner through grief, how to care for yourself while you're caring for someone else, and also the particular challenges non-monogamous relationships present when coping with loss. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.supercast.com. We offer sliding...

For many people. the very topic of HIV is quite scary, but not so for our guest this week, Liz Sutherland of Positive Life New South Wales. We chat with Liz about the vast wealth of information that most of us don't know about HIV. including how it's epidemiology is changing, effective methods for treatment and prevention, and how we can keep ourselves best informed and in charge of our own health...

Fortunately, there's no Polyamory Board of Directors who decides who makes the cut or not. However, that doesn't prevent many people from worrying about whether or not they can claim a polyamorous identity. On this episode, we discuss identity, gatekeeping, and common questions that we get: "Am I still polyamorous if I still feel jealousy?" "Am I still polyamorous if I only have one partner?" "Am...