Monster Crush

Just because the country is burning down around us doesn’t mean we can’t celebrate some all-American monsters. And it doesn’t get more American than the lumberjack folkloric traditions of FEARSOME CRITTERS! So grab a hot dog and get ready to salute these weird monsters of American folklore - the telescopic sniper, the Tripodero, and the super-fast noose-bird, the Roperite! Featuring: Jennifer Till...

Happy Monster Daddy’s Day! While monster dads are far less common than monster moms but we were able to find two frightful flirting fathers all the same. Plus we have A LOT of Spooky News today! So strap in and strap on for the Caribbean nature spirit, Papa Bois, and the Father of All Turtles, the island-sized Zaratan! Featuring: LD is back, what dad archetype do you have, Book Review of Mothman i...

It’s part TWO of our cursed experience with co-host Shadow! Again, the curse was that one episode went too long and ended up as two episodes, so kind of a fun curse in the end. But this episode we finally get to the three cursed objects mentioned in our last episode! So strap in and strap on for these objects of your desire with the bloodthirsty cursed Muramasa Demon Swords, the ill-gotten curse o...

Monster Crush has been CURSED! But mostly the curse is that we played a game for too long, had too much fun, and had to turn one episode into two… So I think we’ll survive! What was planned to be an episode about cursed objects turned into a not-so-mini-game about Haunted Dolls on Ebay. Things did not go to plan when our Haunted Doll Watch turned into a Haunted Doll Botch. But with Shadow in the g...

We at Monster Crush have to apologize, we took a little break and were a little out of practice. So, while we wanted to celebrate Mothers’ Day and all the wonderful monster mommies out there, we weren’t paying attention to our spelling and… Well, we’re celebrating Mummy’s Day and all the monster mummies instead this year. So grab a protective spell and wrap both your date and your tool (even if it...

IN THE MARCH OF MADNESS 2026 CONTINUES! Sixteen entities from Lovecraftian Horror fight tooth and tentacle for your affections. Who will win the finals… and our hearts? For this episode we finish the GOO (Great Old Ones) Conference featuring: Shterot, Atlach-Nacha, Rhogog, Byatis, Hziulquoigmnzha, Chaugnar Faugn, Bugg-Shash, and Nyarlathotep. And as we finish the GOO Conference, we also finish our...

IN THE MARCH OF MADNESS IS BACK! It’s our third year playing this bracket-style game of love. Sixteen entities from Lovecraftian Horror fight tooth and tentacle for your affections. Who will win the finals… and our hearts? This week we take on the BOG (Beings and Outer Gods) Conference featuring: Blackness from the Stars, Shabbith-Ka, Mother of Pus, Lu-Kthu, Daoloth, Kthanid, Fthaggua, and Mh’Ithr...

Happy Valentines Day… or close enough to it. For us at Monster Crush, it’s always the perfect day to celebrate love in all of its weirdly beautiful forms. But, for this amorous time of year we bring you two monsters you can really give you heart to, because that’s what they eat! Prepare yourself for two chimeric monsters with a taste for cardiac cuisine with the predatory Peryton and Ammit, the De...

We hope you didn’t fill up on Demon Princes last time because for this episode we give you another heaping helping. Join us as we round out the last FIVE Demon Princes of Dungeons & Dragons’ Forgotten Realms with the hedonistic Graz’zt, slimy Juiblex, deceptive Fraz-Urb'luu, insufferable Kostchtchie, and alluring Malcanthet! Strap on, strap in, and get ready for another plunge into the Aby...

For all the hype that Stranger Things has given to D&D, people now know what a Demogorgon is… or do they? For this date we get even Strangerer with some of the OG D&D Things, namely D&D Demon Princes so we can tell you what the Demogorgon really is! And this is only part 1! So get ready to plunge into the Abyss with the nightmarish Demogorgon, rotting Orcus, bestial Baphomet, feral Yee...

For the New Year we look back on singletons we met once but never really got a chance at love. So for this date we pull the Pascagoula Elephantmen out of the stables for a little space seduction and alien abduction. Strap in and strap on because these ETs are out of this world. Featuring: we have rhythm (sort of) - New Years Resolutions - “Sliterature” - hot takes on orc romance novels - Spooky Ne...

Happy Holidays from all of us at Monster Crush! To celebrate this festive season we return to the Yule traditions of ol for a couple monsters that are naughty, nice, and everything in between. So jingle your bells and wrap your present for the Mari Lwyd and Grýla the Christmas Witch. Plus a few bonus monsters including The Yule Cat! Featuring: who would Zooey Deschanel play in The Lion King? - you...

For this holiday episode we have only one question for you… Naughty or Nice? Honestly, with monsters it really doesn’t matter which you pick because even the nice ones have a dark side. So wrap your present and stuff your stocking for the naughty Kallikantzaros and the nice Nisse! Featuring: Did we do a Krampus episode? Yes, yes we did - it’s really dark in the PNW - when you can’t count to three...

For many Americans Thanksgiving is a holiday focused on the iconic main dish, the turkey. But what about the country of Türkiye? Apparently it’s chock full of monsters we can smooch! So for this holiday, we gobble down on two Turkish monsters with the iconic Lake Van Monster and the nightmarish Al Basty. Pass the gravy because this episode is going to get saucy! Featuring: an ode to the noble turk...

That’s a lot of ones all in one episode number… So let’s do three cryptids that were only seen once! These monsters were seen for a good time but not for a long time and only for one time. So enjoy The 50-Foot Congo Snake, The Bathysphaera intacta (or Giant Dragonfish), and The Giant Shrimp in the Laundry Room (aka Shrimpy). It’s BIG SNAKE, BIG FISH, BIG SHRIMP… Plus a bonus cryptid! Featuring: sm...

WE’RE BACK! Just in time for halloween we return to our teratophilic ways to explore romance with one of the most iconic monsters - FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER!!! So get ready for jokes to leave you in stitches, love that strikes like lightning, and a monster ready for LONG-TERM commitments because… IT’S ALIVE!!! Featuring: Our podcast relationship Unicorn (Shadow), Halloween traditions & memories,...

In honor of the recent holiday, Hobbit Day, we’re talking Tolkien! Derek is joined once again by special guest Shadow (@shadowsilvia on socials) to delve too greedily and too deep into some Middle Earth monsters! So prepare to make an unexpected party with Smaug the Dragon, The Watcher in the Water, and Durin’s Bane the Balrog! Additional side note: Monster Crush will be skipping a week on our rel...

Monster Crush is back after our Summer Break with all new chills and thrills. For this episode, Derek is joined by special guest Shadow (@shadowsilvia on socials) to discuss the noble Unicorn! And these horny horses have a wild history hiding behind all those sparkles and rainbows. Author Chris Lavers is quoted as saying “The history of the unicorn myth is so tangled that to try and unravel it is...

Summer is a time for fun, sun, and (if you’re anything like us) reading! So for this summer break episode we went back to our childhoods to explore some of the wonderful monsters gifted to us by the one and only R.L. Stine in the Goosebumps series! So get ready for monsters from Calling All Creeps, The Beast from the East, and Night of the Living Dummy! Listeners beware, you’re in for a (sexy) sca...

On this date we fly back into the weird world of Yokai for a couple of avian singletons to nest with. So strap on and strap in for the Kogarasu and the Niwatori no sō! These two feathered friends are sure to peck their way into your hearts… perhaps literally. Featuring: Toilet ghosts and sentient umbrellas, a trip to LD’s Smut Corner, Spooky News: Bigfoot could get you high, eat the prideful and h...

For our second Pride Month episode of 2025 we consider giving a second chance to some monsters who did not get our full attention on previous dates. So this time we explore the wilderness for the Scandinavian Troll! These mysterious monsters of magic and nature have haunted fables and myth far back into ancient times… so it’s about time they haunt our bedrooms! Things are going to get rock hard so...

Happy Pride, you beautiful Monster Crushers! To celebrate the queerest time of the year we wanted to present you all with a true gay icon. And, since we covered Mothman back in episode 69, we delved into pop culture for a figure who has represented the LGBTQ+ community for decades now. So strap on and strap in for the true Master of the Universe and master of our hearts, Skeletor! This skeletal si...

For this Memorial Day we bring you two monsters you just can’t forget about. War is weird and strange stuff happens during times of conflict, so this episode we discuss two giant sea monsters seen by German U-boats during WWI. So get ready to be blown…out of the water by the U-28 Creature and the U-85 Atrocity!  Featuring: The lusty month of May, a visit to LD’s Smut Corner: The Spinster and the G...

We at Monster Crush want to celebrate Mother’s Day in the only way we know how… by making it about smooching monsters. So if you have mommy energy (however you personally define that), we want to wish you a special day full of whatever monsters you love best. But for us, we had to feature a monstrous mother of other monsters coming straight from Greek myth with the monster matriarch, the Echidna!...

Does love have you stumped? Always branching out but your date always leaves? Well we get to the root of the problem this week with our lumbering singletons! No more barking up the wrong tree with two loveable cryptobotanical selections to really shiver your timbers! It’s two green-thumbs up for the Ya-Te-Veo and The Man-Eating Madagascar Tree! Plus a special appearance from The Cow-Eating Tree! F...