MILKLESS

While doing research for another episode, Max came across an article called, "7 Mistakes that Destroy Kids' Mental Strength." After getting past the clickbaity headline, he actually found some pretty solid ideas. The boys go down the list one-by-one (just about all of these are things we mess up sometimes). How often do we rescue our kids from necessary struggle? What does it look l...

Dad… Dad.. Dad! DadDadDadDadDaaaaaaaaaddy Dad! -WHAT?!?! Getting annoyed with your kids is a time-honored tradition as old as parenting itself... but it still sucks! Why is it that the people we love by far the MOST in the world (no offense, spouses) so often drive us up the MFing wall? It's the little things - from fighting over the window seat, to totally disregarding sound parental guidanc...

If you think about the millions of minutes we all spend with our respective families, it’s pretty much guaranteed that every household will develop its own peccadilloes and idiosyncrasies. But none of us get the same window into OTHER people's lives that we do into our own... which leads to the inevitable question: Is this weird? Do your kids INSIST on flushing the toilet? How do you handle b...

“They won’t remember it. The kids will make the whole thing a pain in the ass! It's too hard breaking out of the routine.” These are all the reasons you hear for not traveling with kids, but studies have shown that getting out there and seeing the world has amazing benefits for young people. We're talking tolerance, confidence, curiosity... the good stuff. In this episode, Matt and Max d...

There's no denying it: everybody is worse at everything when they're tired. And that may be more true of parenting than pretty much anything else. We're less patient, less fun, and quicker to snap at our kids when we're gassed. We all know it, and yet a large percentage of us consistently self-sabotage by staying up later than we should. Whether it's doom scrolling in bed,...

This one's got something for everybody. Whether you’re expecting, know and love somebody who is, or are still wondering what the hell happened during that crazy phase right before your kids showed up - this is a dive into the parts of pregnancy that parents (and Dads especially) don't talk about nearly as much as they ought to. Max and Matt had two very different experiences bringing the...

We're all trying to raise healthy kids, but it can be a real battle getting good food into their bellies. Some kids eat everything. Others only want mac & cheese. And most kids seem to prefer an endless parade of snacks to an actual meal. So, how do picky eaters develop? Is there science behind the frustration? Is it nature, nurture, power struggle, total luck of the draw, or a little bit...

When you have kids, you take on an unimaginable responsibility. Most of us realize that, for the first time, we care more about another human being than we do about ourselves. So you put the “self“ on the back burner for a few weeks... and then a few months... and then a few years... and then? This episode is about that metamorphosis, and about finding yourself again after becoming a parent. What...

Kids are NOT supposed to use profanity… right? But then at some point, it just becomes part of normal adult life. Matt and Max dive into the world of cursing with kids. What do you get mad about? What do you let slide? There’s actually a fair amount of data in support of off-color language (and we’ve got the studies to prove it, motherf*cker). So, how do you give your kids the room to experiment,...

The format on this one’s a little different - just a mashup of musings on media. Matt and Max go back-and-forth on their favorite books, movies, shows and songs to read/watch/listen to with tiny humans! We're trying to get our kids hooked on good art. Trying to give them little windows into the adult world. Also, trying not to scare the sh*t out of them. This one's mostly just for fun, b...

It's a debate! Finally, some conflict around here. Max and Matt dive into the world of planning, milestones, skills-building, and generally trying to get your kid ready for the world without giving 'em a complex. We've got one self-described "Chill Tiger Dad," and one artsy go-with-the-flow type... who is also a highly competitive entrepreneur. Contradictions abound. Let&a...

Honesty is the best policy, but snitches get stitches. Don’t keep secrets from your parents, but don’t tell mom about her surprise birthday party. What does it mean developmentally when our kids start lying to us, and how do we help them navigate the complex world of honesty in a polite society? This is a fun one. Lets go! Buy Violet Archer on Amazon today! Buy Violet Archer on Amazon Here Milkles...

American parenting culture constantly emphasizes skills-building and academics, which puts a ton of pressure on Dad's to become Tiger Parents. But what about straight-up fun?! What about free play, imagination, and child-driven adventure? Matt and Max take a look at the many different kinds of play - from team sports to digging around in the mud - exploring the invaluable qualities that horsi...

Do you and your partner keep a secret scorecard on who has done more for the family? Sounds like a TERRIBLE idea - and a great way to start a fight. But the truth is we all keep score more than we realize, and a well-thought-out division of labor is key in a happy marriage. So, who does mornings? Cooks dinner? Does baths? What about the laundry? We look at a few surprising studies, and talk about...

Keeping your kids safe is job one for every parent. But there’s no such thing as avoiding risk entirely, and nobody wants to think of themselves as a helicopter parent. So, how do we balance giving our kids a long leash to explore the world, while holding onto job #1 (safety)? How do we protect our kids without making them think the world is a scary place? And does hovering truly avoid risk, or do...

We didn't know we had a temper until we had kids. Have you ever completely blown your top? When your kids push your buttons, what's the worst thing you've said or done? All parents deal with frustration and anger when raising kids. On this episode, we swap embarrassing stories from when we've lost it, look at a few studies, and trade tips and strategies to keep the volcano from...

How do you provide discipline and consequences for your child in the modern world? You can’t hit ‘em (the research is pretty clear on that), so what do you do to keep your kids well behaved? Is that even the goal? Matt and Max try to navigate the gauntlet of setting boundaries. We wrote a chapter book for kids aged 5-12! Buy Violet Archer on Amazon today! Buy Violet Archer on Amazon Here Milkless...

If you're new to listening to Milkless, you can do in ANY ORDER. So feel free to scan our catalogue and start with a topic that is especially interesting to you. Dads have had a major shift in the last 75 years. We've gone from pipe smoking, unavailable, and disinterested in our kids to either interested but unengaged or neutered and not respected. Did we overcompensate as a culture when...