Midlife Dating Podcast

Paul Nelson of the Midlife Dating Podcast explains how Boomer and Gen X singles can avoid generic, copy‑and‑paste openers and endless messaging by using short, purposeful conversation starters that lead to a call and a date.  He recounts returning to dating in 2013, then hiring a professional dating-profile service in 2017 to improve his profile. He also worked directly with women ghostwriters on...

The First Call: A 30–45 Minute Filter to Turn Matches Into Meet-Ups Paul Nelson of the Midlife Dating Podcast notes, based on what he’s seen in the field, that many online daters either attempt to skip the first phone call or let it run so long that they talk themselves out of a meet-up date, emphasizing that the call is a bridge and filter—not the date.  A short, structured 30–45-minute call afte...

Date Zero: The Low-Pressure, Safe First Meetup Strategy for Midlife Online Dating Paul Nelson of the Midlife Dating Podcast reframes the first in-person meeting after an online match as a low-pressure “meetup” or “date zero,” whose sole purpose is deciding whether you want a real date, not seeking sparks or making big commitments.  He explains that most meetups won’t become matches and recommends...

Ghosting, the Rule of Halves, and the 48-Hour Rule for Midlife Online Dating and Repeating Patterns Paul Nelson of the Midlife Dating Podcast explains why dating app conversations often die and maintains that it's usually normal attrition , not a personal failing.  He introduces the "Rule of Halves," noting predictable drop-off rates from match to message, message to call, and call...

Right Swipe Discipline: Stop Collecting Matches and Start Getting Dates The episode explains why many Baby Boomers and Gen Xers get plenty of dating app matches but never reach phone calls or first-date meetups: they treat matches as progress , keep swiping, and overload themselves with too many conversations.  Podcast host Paul Nelson, drawing on 12 years of online dating and 185 first dates, des...

EP 34 - To Venus and Back, Part 3 of 3 – Last Orbits Around Venus: Dakota, Christine, and Moving On In the final part of our series with Turner Grant , we jump into his “last orbits” around Venus: the intense long-distance Paris connection with Dakota , the secretive New York encounters with Christine , and the slow realization that online dating had turned into a treadmill to nowhere . Turner sha...

In Part 2, we leave the “organic” dates behind and dive into Turner’s first years of online dating . That means profiles, one-and-done coffee meetups, and learning about the stereotypical Three-Date Rule . Turner and I talk through the patterns he began to see: the job-interview dates, the “Daddy interview,” the woman whose dogs were better than any man, and how all of that slowly pushed him to a...

In the first of three conversations with Turner Grant, author of To Venus and Back: One Man’s Quest to Rediscover Love , we start where midlife dating really begins for so many people: after loss, reflection, healing, and a new start in the search for love. Turner shares the story of losing his wife suddenly at 53, raising twin sons (including one with disabilities), and being pushed back into lif...

If Part 1 was the foundation, Part 2 is where Laurie Gerber and I roll up our sleeves and get practical about the real midlife dilemma: You want a real connection—and you don’t want dating to become a second full-time job. However, Paul’s experience is that dating apps reward momentum; however, real attraction often requires trust. Too fast can feel unsafe. Too slow can quickly get “out-paced” by...

In this episode, I’m joined again by dating coach Laurie Gerber ( Love at Any Age ) to unpack one of the biggest midlife dating challenges: how fast is too fast… and how slow is too slow?   Midlife dating mixed with dating apps can create a pacing problem: momentum matters, but trust matters too… and misreading either one can derail the whole thing. Laurie and I compare our two approaches—hers fro...

Highlights for this episode: In this episode, I bring on dating coach Laurie Gerber to coach me in real time—so you can hear exactly how a pro would tune up your dating life, too.  Laurie and I talk about my 104/100 score on her “Are You Ready to Date Like You Mean It?” quiz, my 7 deal-makers, and why I’ve been attracting the wrong attachment styles for years. We discuss approaches to vetting on d...

Highlights for this episode: Paul reviews the first five or over 30 Common Sense Dating Guidelines for the Gen X and Baby Boomer generations. The guidelines coalesce around the limited dating options these generations had in their youth compared to what is available today. Combining our life experiences with new dating tools, such as online dating, allows us to avoid the same embarrassing slip-ups...

Highlights for this episode: Part 2 of Paul’s Holiday Dating-Themed Movie reviews for those Gen X and Baby Boomers who are solo this holiday season. Love at the Christmas Table A destined couple’s trip through time starts at age 4 in the 80s, and at age 4, they meet each year at an annual Christmas gathering. https://youtu.be/4jkprYTRaRU?si=mHIfyHZTgZ5_F2wt Lifetime Channel 2012 Spirited Entertain...

Highlights for this episode: Paul reviews holiday dating-themed movies for those Gen X and Baby Boomers who are solo this holiday season. There are a total of four picks. Two picks in this Part 1 Episode and two more in Part 2. Paul points out the common theme in these movies that is missing in online dating and why we should apply them all year. The Holidate –  After Christmas, a pair of frustrat...

Quick Update: After being on hiatus for a little over a year for a variety of reasons, we're back. There will be new content starting late August of 2024.

Highlights for this Episode: The Glossary term is: Orbiting, where someone keeps popping up on your social media radar, waiting to make a move for a date. In the Retro/Etiquette Segment – We listen in on how the US Navy demonstrates to their officers the right and wrong way to handle a Dinner Invitation . From Blondes Prefer Gentlemen . 1965 US Navy Instructional Film. Paul reviews the book: Datin...

Highlights for this episode: The Glossary term is: The Maybe Date In the Potpourri Segment, Paul offers listeners an excellent refresher on the highly effective 3-1-1 Rule. This straightforward and efficient three-step process not only helps you filter out the flakes and texting buddies but also saves you precious time, enabling you to swiftly move off the dating apps to a meet up date with someon...

Highlights for this episode: The Glossary term is: Serendipidating  In the Retro/Etiquette Segment: We listen in on how the US Navy recommends their officers conduct themselves with their dates in a small gathering. From How to Succeed with Brunettes . 1967 US Navy Instructional Film.  Paul reviews the book: Find a Husband After 35 Using What I Learned at Harvard Business School by Rachel Greenwal...

Highlights for this episode: The Glossary term for this episode is: Ghostbusting. Paul reviews the movie Big Stone Gap, released in 2014. This movie looks into dating and romance in the late 1970s. It demonstrates the typical outcome of what can easily happen when men try to use logic to pursue romance. In the Retro Segment, How to Succeed with Brunettes. 1967 US Navy Instructional Film guides men...

Highlights for this episode: The Glossary term for this episode is: Bromance Paul reviews the movie Swingers, released in 1996. This movie gives us a look into dating in the 1990s, how damaging holding on to your ex and being unable to put them behind you can be, and how dance lessons can come in very handy. In the Retro Segment, How to Succeed with Brunettes. 1967 US Navy Instructional Film. Rest...

Midlife Dating Podcast EP 19 – Dating Truths Part 4 Highlights for this episode: Have you ever gone on a meetup date only to find out their colorful online charisma is nowhere to be found when you meet them in person? This is known as the Cyrano de Bergerac. It's the glossary term for this episode, and we'll take a closer look at this curious creature. I'll be reviewing the movie Be...

Have you been guilty of Professing? It's the glossary term for this episode, and it describes behavior that many of us have embraced at some point in our dating lives, that Hollywood has glamorized but turns out to be creepy in reality. Following the glossary segment, Paul discusses some dating and relationship takeaways from the movie, All I Wish. Here we see that time can heal a rough start...

Having problems getting past the first few dates, let alone the first meetup? Then, you could be guilty of "Projection." This glossary term describes how we may subconsciously project our past negative dating and relationship experiences onto our new dates. Following the glossary segment, Paul reviews Esther Perel's book "Mating in Captivity."   Social and emotional intell...

Have you ever heard of the Flannel Nightgown? It's our glossary term for this episode, and it explains the transition that develops in all romantic relationships. I'll be reviewing the movie Sing Street , released in 2016. It will bring us back to the 80s when things were so much simpler. The film has a great message about taking risks in putting yourself out there and being willing to a...

Approximately Half of those you run across on the dating apps seek "Electronic Vanity Validation." This glossary describes those who use online dating apps and legacy websites who validate themselves simply by who they match up with. Paul reviews the book, The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands by Dr. Laura Schlessinger. In it, we learn that good men are simple beings, hard to find bu...