Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family

"The idea that the family is a democracy and that children and parents have the same responsibility within the home completely ignores the developmental needs of the child " - Mike and Alicia    A child's temper tantrums are frustrating to parents, but we should recognize that they are often a result of a child's deficit in communication, understanding, and emotional control.  Children simply have...

"You are called to have great hearts here, counter-cultural and brave.  You can build something better, freer, more generous, and nobler, beginning in your own home." - Bishop Thomas Olmstead, Complete My Joy 59 Man and woman coming together to build a home is a natural experience that has happened over and over again since the creation of the world, but we need to keep learning about what marriag...

"An important element in forming Christian maturity in teens is creating a 'Yes' culture in the home, where a child can take risks, try new things, and find out more about who they are all while under your guidance." - Mike and Alicia With the advent of the sexual revolution in the 60s and 70s and the subsequent increase in teen sexual activity, the response of the Christian community in the 80s a...

"God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world" - CS Lewis Life can be hard.  Sometimes, in response to difficulties, instead of turning to the Lord in our pain, we self-medicate which can lead to addictions of one kind or another which only leads to more pain in the long run.  In this podcast, we hear the story of...

"With careful planning, honest communication, and the right help and care around you, your different tomorrow can be meaningful and extraordinary."― John Delony Let's be honest, family life is full of stress! Sometimes there are big stresses like the loss of a job, a new colicky baby in the house, overwhelming responsibilities, or marriage issues. But even the little stresses can add up! Moody tee...

"The point is that neuroses don't have to ruin a marriage. If you can accommodate each other's "crazy" side and handle it with caring, affection, and respect, your marriage can thrive." ― John M. Gottman Many people are good at functioning in their marriage, getting along, caring for kids, paying the bills… but are they really thriving?  How can we get more out of the most important relationship w...

"Behold the Heart which has so loved men that it has spared nothing, even to exhausting and consuming Itself, in order to testify Its love" - Jesus to St. Margaret Mary How can we love like Jesus?  What is His love like?  Answering these questions is the role of devotions in the Catholic world.  They help us learn more about God and how He relates to us.  The Sacred Heart of Jesus teaches us to lo...

We need to take a sacramental view of ordinary life - Mike and Alicia Hernon We often say that family culture is the secret weapon of Catholic families.  Why is this?  Because the culture within your home is more powerful than any written word.  It communicates expectations, beliefs, and values to everyone in the family.  In this podcast, we tackle some questions that listeners have sent into us a...

Christ is present in a special way when a couple prays together.  They not only renew their yes to God, but also achieve a deeper union with each other, which springs solely from the union of hearts and couples in the sacrament of marriage. - Fr. Henri Caffarel How can couples move their marriage from surviving to thriving, or from good to great? By making couple prayer a normal part of our marria...

The indissolubility of marriage…should not be viewed as a 'yoke' imposed on humanity, but as a 'gift' granted to those who are joined in marriage…  God's indulgent love always accompanies our human journey; through grace, it heals and transforms hardened hearts, leading them back to the beginning through the way of the cross. - Pope Francis The marriage sacrament is meant to heal and transform us...

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. - Proverbs 31:30 Back by popular demand, this is another interview that we did with Michele Doman, Alicia's mom and mother of 10 grown children, grandmother to over 55, and great grandmother to more than 7!  In the last interview, we talked about Michele's life as a young wife and mother.  In this conversa...

Of course your children don't get along. They don't know how to get along! That's kind of what you are doing as parents, teaching them what they don't know - Mike and Alicia All of us struggle to live in a community.  That is the human condition - we need other people but we also find it hard to live with them!  This is true for children, but also for adults. In this episode, we answer some questi...

"Healing is an essential dimension of Christinaity.  It expresses the entire content of our redemption." ~ Pope Benedict XVI, Jesus of Nazareth Some of us think of healing as being "for other people", those with trauma, abuse, or mental illness.  But that is not the way that Dr. Bob Schuchts sees healing. As you will hear, he believes that healing is part of the story of every Christian because we...

"Christian brotherhood is not an ideal which we must realize; it is rather a reality created by God in Christ in which we may participate." ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer God did not create man in isolation, He created man to live in community with others.  This is the best path for the full development of the human person!  Men need other men to push them, support them, love them, and let them know they h...

"This is a book about love; more exactly, it is about the love that knows no end, the love our hearts yearn for. The love that consumes, that reverberates, that heightens—it is a love that costs everything—yet offers everything. - Theresa and Peter Martin, The Rule When the young priest Fr. Karol Wojtyla was living in Poland, he wrote a "rule" for married couples, similar to the protocols that rel...

"When an army retreats on the battlefield, it doesn't mean that they are giving up. It can mean that they are taking time to reassess and regroup so they can come back stronger. This is the essence of a Family Retreat." ~ Mike Hernon The concept of a family retreat is something that we have developed over the years for our own family.  It grew out of our desire to regroup and reconnect with our ki...

We love hanging out with Chris and Natalie but in this interview, we found out something else we have in common. Both of us had honeymoons that were epic fails! Is the last time you got away, your honeymoon? Hear from all four of us as we talk about the first time that we got away as a married couple without our children and why we think it's so important. Parents have a lot resting on their shoul...

"Christian marriage is the school of love, where despite the limits of our own love, we can discover Christ's presence and power to teach us to love one another with the Love that never fails" - Peter and Debbie Herbeck When we offer date nights, we try to pick topics that are fun for couples but also useful and thought-provoking. That's why we are so excited to share with you this interview we di...

"Teaching is an essential part of our faith that reminds us that following Jesus Christ transforms every part of our lives, from our attitude toward money, to the choices we make at the doctor's office, to the way we build our families." ~ Nancy Bandzuch Parents are charged by God to be good stewards of their children and caring for children includes forming them in the faith and teaching them!  T...

"Words of affirmation are simply true statements affirming the worth of another person" ~Gary Chapman Parents need to take time to consider how they are intentionally calling out the good in the lives of their children because it is within the family that people have their identity - who they are - confirmed and then affirmed over the years. This is just as essential to children as food, clothing,...

"Mothers are the strongest antidote to the spread of self-centred individualism… It is they who testify to the beauty of life". - Pope Francis, Amoris Laetitia The life of a mother is hidden and powerful at the same time, but the message of our culture is that you only matter if you have a strong resume, evidence of your worth, and an education to back it up. This is simply not the way God sees th...

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. " – Mark Twain All families need to play together.  Why?  Because this is how you lay the foundation for your child's belief in God, his self-esteem, and this is how you communicate to him, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that you love him.  In this podcast, we dive deeply into the import...

"Do a date night! It's cheaper than marriage counseling." This is an oldie but goodie podcast for you. We released this one way back in 2015 when we were just starting out but the content in it is something that even we need to be reminded of! When we have gotten into "slumps" in our marriage when we don't feel like we are connecting, working together, or in sync with each other, that is when we n...

"If all fathers fulfilled their duty of watching over the discipline of their children, we should have but few crimes and few executions." ~ St. Alphonsus Ligori If you haven't listened to MFP239 on the foundations of discipline, you should do that first.  This podcast will give the practical steps for those principles.  Once a parent has clear in their mind why they are discipling and they have m...

One thing that we at the Messy Family Project are passionate about is family culture. We call it "the secret weapon of the Catholic family" because it can be so powerful! In this interview, we talk to Elissa Tiprigan of Catholic Family Crate, a business that is in the business of Catholic culture. We talk about how and why she started her business, the importance of beauty in the home, and the ele...