LPN Deep Dives: Crescent City

Join us this week as we talk out of our butts a la Ace Ventura for the entire episode. It was very difficult to get the mics down there/up there but with the wonders of science ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!!!!! We didn't, that's a lie, we used our regular mouths. And what did those mouths GET INTO??? Dance class!!!!! Fouettes out the yin yang! But remember, the road to hell is paved with good intentions,...

During this week's episode we venture through chapters 35 and 36 and the gang finds themselves forced to reckon with more danafacts while faced with Sabitch (although Natalie and I are Sabine SQUARED today so get ready for a lil exxxtra bitch in this ep!) We've got Ithan movin into the boy's flop palace and he's awoo-ing to no one about his FORLORN LOVE. Ruhn and Daybright are slippin-n-slidin cou...

Hunt and Bryce finish up with Andrew and Dice and Clay and realize that together they make a SUPA WEAPON which is both sexy and badass? While they got dogged, Ruhn and Ithan are having quite the poker game with Celestina's Triarii-Hos (and the Hind and the Harpy did NOT laugh at their 'poker i barely know her' jokes.) Maybe they were too busy to laugh? Harpy was definitely looking for the pants me...

Wolves and dogs and whiskey-- sounds like either a great afternoon or a reaaaaaal bad morning! Dreadwolves are skulking about the town and the BOIS are on the beat trying to get the LOWDOWN! We get some interestinggggg information about Big Scary Mordoc but I certainly hope he keeps that sniffer far away from our bois!!! We are also back with Lil Undies and Hunt and Bryce and ughhhhh he is introdu...

DO we need to re-watch Popeye (1980)? Probably not but don't worry there's no Bluto or spinach OUT ON THE BRAIN BRIIIIIDGE!!! Bryce and Hunt don't think for a MOMENT before going to visit the Under King. Nobody's thinking this might not be a great idea?? You guys think he's gonna serve you lunch and have a kiki with you?? Do you think he's gonna show you his BONE GATE tattoo right above his skele-...

OH WE ARE KICKIN OFF PART 2: THE ABYSS and y'all better buckle up because errrrrrybody is learning NEW STUFF and OLD STUFF and some are learning some INBETWEEN stuff if ya knowwhatimeaaaaaaaaan. Tharion is getting a dry punishment for a wet wet man but our boyz are having a time getting their sunball on while trying to find out WHERE ARE THESE DANG SEWER REAPERS COMIN FROM??? Listen as Hunt gets t...

Just a cupla reapers gettin creepy with it (na na na na na na na) gettin creepy wit it! It's like gettin jiggy wit it but a whole lot more dead (at least I HOPE the jiggys are alive??)! We finish up the first part of HOSAB and we start at a crime scene and end up in a sewer which does sound like fun but it's for frown reasons  The crime mer need Ithan's nose! Bryce and Ruhn have a beautiful siblin...

OHHH WE HAVE SOME NOICE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT IN HERE! We follow Ruhn on a mirthrooted fugue state to further some rebellion activity (and get to meet Agent Night AND Agent Daybright YES PLEASEEEEEE!!!) But back in the real world, we are finding out MORE about our torture Bert and Ernie.......AND more about our new Archangel boss. HOW DO WE TRUST WHEN WE ARE BROKEN LIKE A PROMISE?! only one way to...

AWWWWW BOYS WILL BE BOYS and even an OptiCube can build a friendship between two thicc angry meaties!! It's kinda cute that all these murder-torture-machines are living in a dorm together---oy imagine the smell YOU KNOW THEY AIN'T GUN BE CLEANIN. Too busy torturin'! But Bryce ain't too busy to get to know Hunt a little bit more......hell yeah i think we awwwwlllllllll lookin for a back slurp alley...

Although the horniness is getting torqued up THE CULMINATION IS ON A DELAY because cock blockage is here and it's in WOLF FORM. Rebeccalita the fae pool shark graces our studio today WILL SHE GET HER GROOVE BACK? Cormac and Ruhn are sinkin balls (and NOT KISSING, they are COUSINS you gutter dwellers!!) and connectingggg because when ya FAE ya FAMILY! Featuring Dudes Grappling With Erotica starring...

IT'S AN ACTION PACKED LORE DUMP so get your fae ears perked and keep your portals OPEN AND PRIMED! Aidas shows up catting around the apartment spewing his mewling riddles (ugh why can't he just STRAIGHT UP SAY IT? Princes of the Chasm are annoying AF!!) Then we are visited by our big thicc Scotshound Cormac and are we slippin for him? DO WE TRUST HIM? ONLY TIME WILL TELL!!!!!!!!!! Please read up u...

It's TIME TO TAKE YUH PANTS OFF but keep your battys in the belfry because this is no sexy time de-pantsing unfortunately!! Who's got the time to no pants dance when we have a BLOODHOUND to discuss??? Oh lord, I hope the whole gang doesn't show up!!!! (because of the bloodhound gang? Hunt wants to do it like they do on the discovery channel!) Please read up until Chapter 17 for next week!!! These...

Ohhhhh what we would DO with a Mommy Warbucks!!! But for now the Furys Axtar sit with their unnecessary straps and longing to seduce via tongue and ice cream. Can you imagine how annoying it would be if your brother could pester you via mind connection? Well, Bryce is dealing with it a LOT better than we would!!!! What's a woman to do when she's trapped at a PENIS PIZZA PARTY? Please read up until...

WHAT DO A SEXY TECHNOLOGY HEAD AND A SEXY MER HAVE IN COMMON?? Perfect. Costumes. (and a need for WET. STEED.) (maybe?) Tharion is on the hunt for some answers but will the answer be AGHHHHHH MY LEGGGGSSSS AREN''T LEEEEGGGSSSSSS? No he's got LIVES TO SAVE! And don't forget-- you better empty the drain before you use your brain! Please read up until Chapter 13 for next week!!! These Deep Dives are...

We have a new boss mommy in town! Is she a bad boss mommy or a good boss mommy? Oh do we love to live in the sludge of the morally grey! We meet two new angel boyz Helhound and the Hammer but SURPRISE we are NOT dreaming about their wingspan...... Speaking of throbbing angels, we ARE dreaming about Hunt's wingspan but THAT BOY CAN'T STAY OUT OF TROUBLE! What are we going to do with him?? KISS HIM...

What do we do?? ALL WE WANT IS TO CUDDLE KISS ON OUR UMBRA MORTIS and all we get is a sad boi wolf ex-friend bleeding on our floor! We SUPPORT RUHN’S DADDY FIGHT before getting JUICY DEETS on some betrotheds. Is Jesiba…..feeling something for Bryce? New vanir mother figure with a mysterious past and an even more enigmatic present? DON’T MIND IF I DO!  Please read up until Chapter 11 for next week!...

What is this- a surprise party?!?!? Ugh big hot steed Cormac shows up and he has got some news to share with the party that might make Hunt sizzle out of his lightening pants. Speaking of sizzling out of his lightening pants, Bryce and Hunt come home to ANOTHER big thicc surprise. But we do leave you with an important question: HOW DOES ONE HAVE SEX WITH A MER? Please read up until Chapter 9 for n...

GET YER HOOVES UP These fae baes are goin to a PARTY and we are ALL INVITED! Everybody's fulla spirits and lookin to KISS but some people have made stupid boundaries about how far their kissing goes (cough Brunt cough)!!! We'[ve got your mirthroot..... we've got your first light accessories.... and you KNOW we got a surprise portal! BUT IS IT TO HEL? STAY TUNED Please read up until Chapter 6 for n...

We are back with our besties and it's months later after the end of the last book but has ANYBODY DEALT WITH THEIR FEELINGS? Hell no! Let's go to the ballet instead and flirt with a winged thicc boi in front of our parents? OKURRRRRRRR! Please read up until Chapter 4 for next week!!! These Deep Dives are based on novels by Sarah J Maas. Intro music by Ryan Connor. Cover art by Jeff Nitzberg. Subsc...

THE TIME HAS COME, the walrus said, TO TALK OF MANY THINGS! But not about shoes or ships or sealing wax but actually the prologue of the second Crescent City book House of Sky and Breath. Jackie and Natalie are jumping in as two bad ass bitches so get geared up WE'VE GOT LIVES TO SAVE. Please read up until Chapter 2 for next week!!! These Deep Dives are based on novels by Sarah J Maas. Intro music...

TIS THE END OF CRESCENT CITY BOOK ONE!!! Let's navigate allllllll the loose ends that SJM ties up as we careen towards our ending. Will all the loose ends be constricted? Prepare your brains for some TIGHT TIGHT ENDS. These Deep Dives are based on novels by Sarah J Maas. Intro music by Ryan Connor. Cover art by Jeff Nitzberg. Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ on Apple Podcasts to listen to ad-free n...

Bryce is pulling a Forrest Gump in more ways than we expected!! In this penultimate episode of the first Crescent City book, we are allllll hurtling towards the "trying not to die" finish line and let's hope WE ALL WIN THIS RACE! Please read through the end of the book for next week!!! These Deep Dives are based on novels by Sarah J Maas. Intro music by Ryan Connor. Cover art by Jeff Nitzberg. Sub...

As we careen toward the end of this book, we find Bryce and the rest of the gang running from the Asteri. So much is happening at once, powers are IGNITED and HOW DO WE GET RID OF ALL THESE DARN DEMONS? Please read up until Chapter 94 for next week!!! These Deep Dives are based on novels by Sarah J Maas. Intro music by Ryan Connor. Cover art by Jeff Nitzberg. Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ on App...

THE DEMONS ARE ON THE LOOSE!!! We watch in HORROR as Bryce and the rest of Midgard battles against the many portals opened by Micah. Some people surprise us with their actions SOME PEOPLE DON'T but who's got the time to deal with it- WE HAVE A WORLD TO SAVE! Please read up until Chapter 91 for next week!!! These Deep Dives are based on novels by Sarah J Maas. Intro music by Ryan Connor. Cover art...

Bryce is found in quite a bit of a pickle this week and unfortunately it IS a big dill! We are ALLLLLL watching as Micah corners Bryce and Syrinx and Lehaba inside Griffin Antiquities BUT HOW CAN THEY BATTLE AN ARCHANGEL??? You're gonna have to tune in to find out...... (or like, you've already read ittttt BUT COME EXPERIENCE IT WITH US) Please read up until Chapter 87 for next week!!! These Deep...