LoveLife Podcast

Intimacy is a word with many meanings–some quite nuanced.  In this episode, Alvean and Doug offer their views on intimacy and how best to achieve it. For a complete transcript, click here: LL60-What is Intimacy

It has been said that life is a poor teacher because it first tests us then gives the lesson.  What are the lessons life has taught us about true love?  In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss their own lessons and those that listeners have shared.  For a complete transcript, click here: LL59-What has true love taught you?

Can relationships grow stale and wither on the emotional vine? In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about the ways in which feelings can change–sometimes growing diminished and how one can alter that course and breathe fresh life into a relationship. For a full transcript, click here: LL58-Is there a use by date….

Alvean and Doug talk about their own regrets and the most common ones they’ve heard from listeners.  How do you navigate those feelings and emerge with a more affirmative attitude?  Click here for a full transcript: LL57-Your Biggest Regrets

Sometimes the past is something we recall with fond memory, while at other times we’d rather forget.  In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss the impact children from a prior relationships can have on your current one.  Will it be positive or a field of emotional landmines that can explode when you least expect it?  For a full transcript, click here: LL56-Relating to children from a prior r...

In this episode, Alvean and Doug take on the difficult question of what to do when a relationship becomes a party of three and the two are no longer a sacred bond.  How does one recover, if at all?  For a complete transcript, click here: LL54-You, Me and ………

Ask most women about the men in their life and there is a good chance that they will describe the men in the life as opaque or lacking when it comes to expressing their feelings.  As trite as it may seem they aren’t wrong–but what they may not know is what their man is really feeling but not discussing.  There are many reasons for this seeming disconnect, and in this episode Alvean and...

As we age, most of us retain certain personality traits but often change our perspective on issues as they are informed by life experience.  What we want out of our lives, our value systems and our views of others can change –sometimes dramatically– as we enter different stages of life.  In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about their own experiences and the ways in which attitudes a...

Let’s face it, relationships can be hard to sustain.  They require constant attention and it can feel like work, not fun.  In the midst of those challenges one or both partners can be tempted to stray–looking for a more nurturing, happier, or simply less stressful alternative.  In some cases this leads to cheating, or a breakup, but it doesn’t have to.  In this episode, Alvean an...

Chances are you’ve heard someone ask this question or maybe you have asked it yourself.  For some, dating, much less finding the one is a frustrating and ultimately defeating experience leading to a sense of hopelessness. There are many reasons we don’t connect.  In this episode Alvean and Doug talk about the ways in which we can get in our own way by setting unrealistic expectations,...

No one ever wants to think about it and no matter how gently and thoughtfully it is done, it is almost always very hurtful.  In this episode, Alvean and Doug take up the issue with some helpful thoughts on how best to handle a breakup whether you are initiating or the recipient.  They offer some suggestions on how to help avoid anger and recrimination and equally important, how to help one’s...

For most couples the arrival of their first child is both a blessing and long dreamed of moment.  But it can also be challenging for both parents.  Demands on time and patience, fears about preparedness, added financial burdens, and potential disagreements about parenting are just a few of the bumps in the road new parents can encounter.  In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about the practical a...

Satisfying relationships can be challenged by many external factors, not least among these family and friends who feel it is appropriate to weigh in on a couple’s privacy and insert themselves into the mix–often to the detriment of the relationship.  We call these circumstances toxic –as they can poison an otherwise positive relationship or inflate minor differences to the point...

Some may see them as May December romances, others find significant age differences in relationships a bit cringy.  But the real question is does age truly matter?  In this episode Alvean and Doug take on this sometime thorny subject with their usual fresh insights and real world examples.  For a full transcript click here: LL48-Does Age Matter?

Friends and family can be part of a wonderful network of love and support, but there is one thing couples should never do, and that is to involve eaither into their lives as armchair therapists or relationship counselors. Despite what they may say or do, family and friends have conscious and unconscious biases, they are untrained and almost always will make matters worse rather than better.  To fi...

Love can be conditional or unconditional we are told and of the two most people yearn for unconditional love.  But is that ever truly the case?  Can we ever be loved just the way we are or are we destined to find that our significant other wants to change us–just a little bit? In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about how couples support each other or fail to meet each other’s needs...

At some point in life most of us ask ourselves the existential question, why are we here–what is our purpose in life?  In this episode, Alvean and Doug talking about the journey –how individuals alone and together can begin to explore answers to that question. Often it can lead to a deepning commitment to one another and to a richer and more fulfilling life.  For a complete transcript,...

Tyhe first blush of a new relationship can be hot and heavy, full of chemistry and passion.  But as time goes by and things fall into a routine couples might find themselves asking, “is that all there is?’  In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss how to handle a perceived change in the emotional climate and restore the balance that brought a couple together in the first place.  For a...

When troubles arise in a relationship it can sometimes result in the triggering of a fight or flight response.  In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about those responses and how to avoid them. For a full transcript, click here: LL42-Fight or Flight

Those words in the wedding vows about remaining together and supporting one another in sickness and in health are put to the test when serious health issues arise.  How couples handle these crises says a great deal about their bonds and their ability to weather the difficult storms that may arise in any relationship and at any time.  In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk from personal experience a...

Do couples grow towards each other as they grow older or further apart?  Alvean and Doug discuss the ways aging can affect relationships for better or for worse and how successful couples keep the spark alive. For a full transcript of this episode, click here: LL40-Growing Older

What happens when that first rush of love goes away–or diminishes in intensity.  Is Love over–di you make a mistake or is this just a pause in a life filled with love? In this episode Alvean talk frankly about how love ebbs and flows and how we are the agents of that tide. For a full transcript click here: LL39-After the Love

It can be crippling to face the news these days–but in the midst of the negativity and strife there are ways to create an oasis of calm and serenity.  In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss techniques for transforming your immediate world into a more forgiving and supportive environmwnt. For a full transcript, click here: LL38-Staying Positive in a Negative World

Too often couples can struggle with control issues or resort to manipulation to get their way.  Both are destructive, eroding the trust and affections of both partners.  Instead try persuasion. In this episode, Doug & Alvean talk about the art of persuading and techniques for entering into an empathetic understanding of your partner’s aims and desires. For a full transcript, click here:...

Learning to listen to one another–not just hear but trul listen with your entire attention is a recipe for an enduring relationship.  In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about how we can learn to improve our listening and our talking skills so that we communicate what we want and need effectively to our partner. For a full transcript, click here: LL36-Listening-Tune in or Tune out