Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott

Just Wear the Mask.  It’s Not a Big Deal! Or, is It? A Developmental Psychologist’s Concerns Regarding Masks on Children—and All of Us! We’re bringing you another segment of our “Love & Life:  Let’s Talk About It” series.  These are topics that can be hard to broach and in some cases, conversations around these issues have been censored—either by social media platforms, or by social agreement—...

No one walks down the aisle on their wedding day expecting to cheat on their spouse. But sadly, it happens all too often.  What happens? Why do couples stray? Elliott and I discuss 4 types of affairs (Pittman) and 3 reasons why they happen (Balswick & Balswick).  Join us for part 1 in our series on infidelity. Learn how to protect your marriage from an affair and/or recover from the pain if in...

We’ve all heard it a million times—you are what you eat. And, of course it’s true—every cell in our body relies on and is sustained by the nutrients we ingest. So on a physical level, this reality is obvious.  But, the more research I do, the more I realize how much this adage—you are what you eat—pertains to our mental health as well.  In some ways, I think about all the work I’ve done as a psych...

About a year ago, I started hearing a term that was new to me—seed oils. Apparently, they’re everywhere—in virtually all processed foods. And, recent research links them to horrible health outcomes. So, I did a lot of reading and found that much of what I’d understood about dietary fats was completely off base. For years, I’d been making food choices I thought were healthy but in fact, they were t...

We’re in the midst of a mental health war. Over the last 50 years, we’ve raised awareness and developed abundant treatment options, yet Americans’ rates of depression and anxiety continue to skyrocket (Whitaker, 2015). Today, Elliott and I discuss my reflections on his recent messages about the epidemics of anxiety, depression, loneliness, and addiction. We conceptualize the current mental health...

Elliott’s mental health series continues with a message about addiction. Sadly, addictions have touched us all—whether we’ve struggled ourselves or we’ve endured the pain of watching a loved one wrestle with the grip of addiction. Elliott shares an understanding of addiction through a Biblical lens. He tackles questions surrounding the grip of addiction and the hope and healing we can find in Chri...

Depression. No one can escape it. Yes, some of us struggle more than others, but sadness, despondency, and despair are part of life. Of course, we’d prefer to skip over the valleys. We’d rather stay on the mountaintops but that’s not how life works. Can we accept depression as a normal part of the human condition? Does despondency serve a purpose—other than making us miserable?  What does Scriptur...

Abating - something becomes smaller and less intense. Did you know we are dealing with an epidemic of loneliness in our culture today? More than ever people are asserting feelings of loneliness in their lives.  Today we continue Pastor Elliott’s series on mental health on the topic of loneliness. He covers the following topics: - What is loneliness? - How we emotionally and physically respond to i...

Do you struggle with anxiety? Have you felt disempowered on how to address it in your life? In today’s episode Elliott shares a presentation he gave on the topic of anxiety and how we can proactively attack it with action!  Elliott discusses the following: The Top 8 Causes of Anxiety Mental and Physical Manifestations  The Root of Anxiety And Steps to Overcome Anxiety Through: Situational Awarenes...

How can we remain empowered when we’ve been on the dating scene for SO long? As you know, I spent 27 years dating—from age 15 until I married at 42. It can be exhausting, demoralizing, and heartbreaking. How then, do we remain happy, hopeful, and positive on our journey to love? Today’s guest, Roshini Rajkumar, also dated for many years before meeting her now husband. Fun fact: they fell in love a...

According to a recent KFF poll, 77% of women would like birth control pills to be available without a prescription—assuming they’re safe and effective. But are they? Effective? Okay. But, safe? Not so much. Among the many side effects of using hormonal birth control is an increased risk of breast cancer. According to a study by Dr. Marilyn Althuis of the University of Maryland, “Women under 35 yea...

Psychotherapist Elliott Anderson is back to continue our series on Attachment Styles. This week we unpack Avoidant Attachment and consider the question, “Is it actually possible to have a relationship with someone with an avoidant attachment style?” Specifically, we address: Why avoidant men may initially appear very excited about the relationship and interested in commitment, but then later, they...

Join us today as we revisit Love & Life's most popular episode to date: Anxious Attachment on Dating and Relationships with Elliott Anderson, M.A. Ep. 165 I hear this question from women in my community all the time—“I have an anxious attachment style. Will I ever be able to be in a secure relationship?” To address this concern, psychotherapist Elliott Anderson and I take a deep dive into...

We recently received a question from a listener in our community: “What is spiritual abuse in and outside of a Christian context and how do individuals heal from it?” The timing was perfect as Elliott and I had planned on continuing our woundedness series with an episode devoted to the spiritual wound. Elliott and I discuss 3 types of spiritual abuse: Complete absence of spiritual opportunity.  In...

Have you ever dated a narcissist? Have you been in a relationship with someone so cold and cruel, you’re pretty sure he/she could be diagnosed as having Narcissistic Personality Disorder? Then again, maybe he was just a bad guy! Either way, this episode is for you! Elliott and I discuss the following: The prevalence of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. The DSM criteria for NPD. Narcissism as a re...

We’re back for part 2 of our conversation with Dr. Duana Welch to tackle the frustrating reality so many women experience—they want to fall for a good guy, but struggle to feel the sparks and attraction. Dr. Welch calls this the “Nice Guy, but Syndrome” because she hears this all too often, “He’s a nice guy, but . . .” In part 2 we cover the following: Do you really have an Anxious Attachment styl...

Are you attracted to bad boys? Do you try to fall for the nice guys but end up feeling . . . meh? If so, this episode is for you! Love & Life fan favorite, Dr. Duana Welch, is back to share the science based reasons you can’t get enough of emotionally unavailable men, yet you struggle to be attracted to men you know would be good for you. Dr. Welch shares: Why women are so often drawn to bad b...

Money and relationships intersect on myriad levels. Our behavior around finances reflects our beliefs, values, and priorities—and, the same could be said about our behavior around relationships! Certified Financial Consultant Veronica Grant joins Elliott and me to discuss dating, relationships, and money. As Veronica puts it, “We don’t want to bring bank statements to a first date, but it’s import...

Power dynamics are an inherent element of all relationships. According to the “Law of Least Interest,” the person who is least interested in maintaining the relationship holds the majority of the power. Naturally, this principle impacts dating and marriage. How can we ensure our power balance remains equitable?  What do we do when we realize we lack power in our partnership?  This week we answer t...

In today’s world of screens and scrolling, many of us find ourselves struggling to concentrate and focus. In recent years, more and more Americans have received diagnoses of ADHD. Such diagnoses may often present unique challenges to dating and relating. Help is here! Elliott has been energetic since birth—our mom even claims he was more active in the womb!😊 Over the years, teachers suggested he...

According to the Institute of Family Studies, 20% of married men and 13% of married women have admitted to cheating on their spouse. For many couples, infidelity destroys their marriage—40% of adults who have committed adultery are now divorced compared to 17% of spouses who have never cheated. But affairs don’t always end marriages and in today’s episode, Jill and Mark Savage share how they navig...

What is a woman? In the last several years, this question—which once would have seemed perfectly obvious to anyone—has become both perplexing and divisive. Feminist Kara Dansky joins Love & Life for our first “Love & Life: Let’s Talk About It!” episode. We’re committed to open conversations—even about subjects that are currently considered taboo. Kara and I consider the following questions...

We pick up our Anderson Family Roundtable by sharing more on birth order—how we’ve seen it impact our personalities and also, how it’s influenced our choice of friends and significant others. We also revisit sibling woundedness—the intensity of the wounds but also, the hope and healing possible! Specifically, we explore: The birth order of virtually all Elliott’s best friends. The birth order of m...

Welcome to a “behind the scenes” episode of Love & Life! Elliott and I loop in our older brother, Warren, to discuss the influence of our sibling relationships on our development. We begin by delving into how birth order impacts our personality traits. With 3 kids in our family we’ve had fun analyzing each other over the years and we do, in fact, possess many of the stereotypical traits of old...

When we consider our childhood, we typically think about our parents’ influence on our development. But what about our brothers and sisters? Recent research in developmental psychology suggests we’ve been overlooking the profound impact our siblings have on us—not only on our childhood experiences, but also our adult relationships. As siblings ourselves, Elliott and I have lots to say about this t...