Lotsa Pasta

Let’s have a moment, you and I, here in the dark abyss of this old-ass shady-ass tunnel. A moment of respite to those who we’ve lost on our journey, with a healthy dose of tea; If you don’t mind my sentiment, or lack thereof. People often ask me when certain people are coming back and the truth is, I really don’t know. And worse even, the ones I DO know as the ones that are DEFINITELY NOT coming b...

Oh no, what’s that in the water? It’s hairy, it looks like a Dad, and it’s scared as hell. Holy shit. It’s Scutch MacGee, stepping out of the bog and onto our vessel with the utmost urgency. He’s here to join us on another legendary episode of Lotsa Pasta because we’re back to hail the king, baby. And I’m not talking Elvis. Another short story from an earlier collection of Stephen’s, this one hold...

This is the end, my friends. Her name is Lily Madwhip and we’re at the conclusion. It’s been quite an ADHD riddled adventure, hasn’t it? And we’ve seen young Lillian come so far. She’s faced death, and WASDEMONS, and she’s making friends along the way. I hope everyone enjoyed this series, as we surely did. I’m not saying too much purely out of trying to avoid spoilers, but this is both a satisfyin...

It’s always so much fun to record with friends across the country, specifically when you don’t know what you’re going to end up reading. This episode gets into some seriously triggering territory so this is your first and final warning. We do not vet these stories before we read them on the show, as evidenced by the MANY episodes before this one. All our reactions are live, all subject matter take...

It seems like we close each part of this story on a cliffhanger. Which makes it unusually addicting to listen to, in my opinion. Last episode ended very climax-y. In this third episode, we see a lot of action and a lot of payoff, and it’s not even the ending. We see Meredith finally play her Chekov’s Gun, we see some serious stakes, and we see some interesting powers. This is a fun story. WhereAmI...

It feels like it was just yesterday that Django and I started the Games with Ghoulies series. The idea was simple: Creepypasta has instruction based rituals as stories sometimes. What if we pretended to do them, what would the outcome be? Death, usually. Spooks, maybe. Comedy, undeniably. And with these games and rituals presented before us, sometimes we need that every-man perspective to ground u...

Lily is back at it again with her shenanigans and ADD/ADHD way of speaking. It’s funny, isn’t it? Two 30 year old dudes reading basically glorified fan-fiction of a little 12 year old girl. Yes, there are angels/demons and mind powers and shit around every corner but like, at it’s core, this is a family drama about a little girl. Funny. At least it’s funny to me. WhereAmI? Is probably more at home...

Deputy Dewey, what is that in your pants? Oh no, it’s AQUA-SLASH. Just kidding, we didn’t watch that garbage, instead we just summarized our thoughts with the help of Red Letter Media! Anywho, the relevance of dying in a water park is high and so is the tide. What is going on at Uncle Bob’s Wicked and Wild Waterpark, we ask. The answer? Well, let’s just say some of this shit belongs in some of Dep...

HEY GUYS, It’s me and WhereAmI? In a new series! This one is about a little girl who may be crazy, may be haunted, may be guarded by angels, or may be ‘was-demons.’ I DON’T KNOW YET - Or do I? Well, maybe I do. But you don’t, and that’s the point of listening. Are you not entertained? You should be! Because this kid totally has ADD or ADHD of some kind and this shit is a rollercoaster. ENJOY. My N...

It's been a while since we've visited the gas station. Tenron Otrin was eager to revisit our buddy Jack and see how he's keeping up. The gas station is always easy to jump back into because it's 'more of the same' with 'a little bit new' and it perfectly balances those two without ever changing too much. On today's episode, the NEW comes in the form of animals. Jack has talked about the creatures...

As we enter new territory on today’s episode of Lotsa Pasta, we pay our respects to the forefathers that came before us. Alvin Schwartz and the Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark. Stephen King and his various works. And today. R.L. Stine and his Goosebumps. So much can be said about this man and this series, but instead, how about you listen to the episode for that part. No, this isn’t a deep dive...

One of my favorite guests is back and it’s been a short while since we’ve seen some of these stories. It’s Cannibal Siren and we’re reading more of One Page Wonder’s Stories to Read Alone at Night. We get into the Halloween Spirit to welcome in the new year, - Why? Because fuck you, that’s why. Then we get into some old school urban legend spooky ghost lore with this shit. It’s a radical little ep...

I’ve been waiting quite some time for this day. You all should know this. I may have talked about it a couple times on prior episodes but the stars -er- clouds did not align until this day. Tenron Otrin joins me, of course, to revisit the horror, the absolute abysmal terror that is Sony Pictures and Screen Gems monstrosity that is Slender Man the movie, released in 2018. What a harrowing tale we w...

I know what you’re thinking. Christmas is over. Why is there a Christmas episode now? Aren’t we done with these? Obviously not, because I’m both a sadist and a masochist. I want to feel the pain and I want to share it with all of you. The pain of the holiday season, coming to a podcast near you, starring Tyler Perry as Madea. I hope you guys like it because it may be the last one we ever do. For r...

What did you think of that first part? Kid needs GTFO, amirite? Too bad he’s broke, in the middle of the woods, with no vehicle, surrounded by cult members. That’s a very no-way-out type of situation, yeah. When you can’t use your muscle, use your brains, right? Find a different way out of your situation by OUTSMARTING the dumb-ass cult. Yeah, that’ll work. Shut the fuck up, Raphael! Sorry, Sofa K...

Royalty has returned to the show and out of nowhere, it seems. What a pleasure to have Sofa King back again so soon and for his first series no less! It’s only a two-parter but this camp-story-gone-cult has a few twists and turns you may not see coming. Is it the best written story we’ve ever read? No, absolutely not. Is it is the best voice work we’ve done? Also no, absolutely not. Was it a fun t...

What a rollercoaster ride of a series, right? I mean, not literally, but LITERALLY, right? In part one we’re just minding our business and doing our thing and next thing you know - we’re all sorts of topsy-turvy. What a ride! This is one of my favorite things I’ve read in a while and I’m so thankful to the author for having done such a wonderful job. I am genuinely honored to read it on my 5 year...

This might be the shortest episode I’ve done in a while. It was quick and sweet. I just wanted to get through the rising action of the second act of this story but without going TOO far. I want the climax of the next episode to come together and culminate in the beauty that is its conclusion. This is all part of the plan, my sweet listener. 
Stay tuned. 
 We Used to Live Here(4:06) by Polterkites...

It’s been five years since the inception of this show. What more can I say. I just want to read a good story by myself. So that’s what I’m going to do. 
 We Used to Live Here(7:56) by Polterkites Check out our episodes on Youtube!
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Ramses Vanderslice is back to finish what he started. He’s been handed his bar of soap and he’s gonna wash himself raw, folks. He’s gotta get clean. Cause we’re going back to THE SHOWERS. And it’s gonna get messy.  If it hasn’t already, right? After that part one, if we were messy then, then we’re about to get filthy. Is this scary, yet? You decide! Ramses read these and I haven’t heard from him s...

Grab your closest copy of HELLRAISER, folks! Play the beginning of the track and then when we pause for you, start playing your copy of the movie and our show at the same time. It'll be like you're right there with us, as Deputy Dewey and I heckle the shit out of the holiday season. Enjoy! Check out our episodes on Youtube!
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Ramses Vanderslice could not have manifested again at a better time. Right out of the void in my heart, he appears with a single word: SHOWERS. I don’t know what he’s getting at. Does he need to shower? If he wants to see my shower? I don’t know but SHOWERS. We give Ramses what he needs, folks, because this two-parter is special. It holds a special place in our 2021 Halloween season-heart as one o...

New Challenger Approaching! I know we just released a new fan-to-record appearance last month with Midnight Bride but I’ve been waiting to release her and today’s guest -TORUS FILTH- for A LONG TIME. Torus Filth comes to us across the globe, through time and space, to share stories about the islands of New Zealand. How I wish to brave those New islands at one point in my life, but until then, we’l...

Imagine, if you will, a thrilling conclusion. An ending of epic porportions. We’ve come this far, and traveled to near-impossible territory. We’ve battled literal demons and ripped through dimensions with manifestations of entities never seen before: All looking to claim souls of the damned. This is sin eater. Not your average fairy tale. No princesses. No knights. No dragons.  
Sin Eater(20:21) b...

Scary stories. Local urban legends. That one friend who told that spooky tale around a campfire that one time. A personal experience, embellished over time to become a product of performance. This is the heart of Not Hot But Spicy. Random people telling their random yarns. Are they real? Who can say. Are they completely made up? No clue. That’s what makes it so compelling. Some of them feel as rea...