Lost in Txtlation

It seems like today we are just itching to purge people from our lives. We have forgotten what it is to disagree with others, what it was like to not have a swipe at our finger tips when we felt down or alone or loss. We forgot what it was like to debate, let alone get things wrong when we can just “google it”. But can you google the wrong inflection, a lapse of judgement, a misguided thought? No,...

We are breeding a generation of pampered “feelings”. We are breeding a generation protected by the “block” button. We are breeding a generation of “ghosts”...  ...When I say a generation, I don’t just mean “millenials” or “Gen Z”, I mean everyone who is adopting online dating into their life. It is easier this way. It is convenient. Because honestly, no one likes being hurt, so if you show us a wa...

I used to believe there was this conscious effort that went into finding the right person quicker than others. I am not talking about meeting them and then getting to know each other, but through personal exploration, sense of self, cultural differences, there was a possibility to see fireworks/ hear music the first time you met. That to me seeing multiple people at once, I.E. “Modern Dating”... h...

There are two faces to every person. The face you see when you come home from work, the face you see when you are covered in daily dirt, even the face you see when you cry. That is face one. Now there is face two the one where you are so close you can barely see. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/the-two-face-theory-3/

So online dating has taught me something new, I have to be really critical of people’s faces. God, Tristan, you are so shallow! Wait let me explain… So an online dating profile is comprised of 10 or so images of the person. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/i-like-your-face-i-think/

Sometimes we need to FEEL like we are teenagers again in the very basic sense, where our own age in our minds becomes that of a pubescent adolescent, which honestly, when do we NOT feel that anyway, we don’t age mentally as much as we think we do.. anyway I digress, if we apply that to what we know now and how we have grown, allowing us to actually enjoy the ride, what an awesome ride it can be. h...

With the right color correction and depth of field you are going to miss the world around anything that may seem imperfect.  Instead of the feeling of bliss when your relationship turns into a movie, it should be a warning that you are only watching the highlights of the complete picture. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/this-feels-like-a-movie-perhaps-i-shouldnt-want/

Does this, turned cheesy pickup line, have actual validity? I feel as though there is a moment in any date, relationship, meeting, where the “glimmer” usually enhanced by a dimly lit wine bar or restaurant’s candle light turns from the casual side effect of ambient lighting to an emotional response to the person across the way from you.  https://www.lostintxtlation.com/that-sparkle-in-your-eyes/

If you are open to yourself and can be open with me, I want to get to know you not based on finding the perfect outfit for a first date, and then canceling because you can’t, but on the person you are every day, which leads to better conversation and a more relaxed meeting.  https://www.lostintxtlation.com/the-perfect-you/

I just want you(meaning anyone) to read past the lines, I am not a dead poet but dammit a little analysis never hurt. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/multi-task-me-3/

I desperately need someone in my life who understands that a question doesn’t only consist of Cause and Effect, but Causes and Effects.  https://www.lostintxtlation.com/causes-and-effects/

Online dating is and always will be as simple as: “Finding the other person attractive” “Seeing if there might be some similar likes/dislikes” And hey guess what… that is no different than meeting in, wait for it, real life. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/online-dating-is-simple-you-are-the-one-making-it/

Have you ever waited for the phone to ring? Have you ever just waited in general, even if you didn’t know the person more than a conversation or a glance, for the next time you could be in the same place at the same time. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/are-we-all-that-important-to-one-another-3/

I often wonder why people think they are stronger on their own. While I myself do feel strong in my own right and enjoy doing things myself, I often feel if I were to be able to find the right person to bring into my life and me theirs, I would be stronger not in my own person persay, but in the joint lives of us together. being me, but part of the whole. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/stronger-t...

Trauma in my past built in this amazing ability to process a thousand possible scenarios from something as simple as a sudden breath, micro expression on a face, or even the lack of words. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/give-my-brain-a-breather/

See I love to observe people. I totally understand what it means when you say you want to talk with someone rather than talk about them. I feel like that is becoming a lost art these days, talking “With” someone. BUT TRULY talking with them. Not surface passing conversation but being ok with talking about good and bad on any day at any given moment. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/observation-vs-a...

It is so incredibly complicated getting to the second date these days. The rules of “3 days before a call” have long been muddied, if not completely forgotten.  https://www.lostintxtlation.com/the-second-date-limbo/

Dating can be intimidating.. with all the different dates we go on, it feels like a rush to the metaphorical finish line of “pulling full attention”. So we work hard to get it, but do we compromise just being ourselves for the “win”? It’s all about perception, state of mind, and timing. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/intimidating/

We need to stop treating our potential significant others so carefully, formulaically, differently. Ya know that crude you, you show to your best friend? Or that goofy side to your family? Or that weird crazy side to your cat or dog? THAT is what you should be showing to someone you want to get to know. The small moments of you. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/sustainable-relationships/

People are idiots when it comes to boundaries of their partners and understanding not EVERYONE is the same. Trust works differently for different people. And the best way to be a good PARTNER to your PARTNER is to understand their comfort and your comfort and meet in the middle of said comfort so everyone is comfortable. And then realize SOMETIMES, SOMETIMES, you won’t be fucking comfortable!. htt...

I meet so many people who are under the assumption that I want them to “impress me” when I meet them. That I want them to be the ultimate version of themselves that is unsustainable for any elongated period of time. To be this person who will make me love them. Only one problem, if I do fall in love with that person, when you stop caring, who the hell am I left with? https://www.lostintxtlation.co...

People often set timelines for when they can start being vulnerable in a relationship. The truth is, to find someone who understands you even when you are vulnerable and open, that it doesn’t mean you have uncovered all the multi faceted parts of your person. Time tells this, time is the mitigating factor that allows this, but the time you put in on the journey should be genuine and real. https://...

“I feel like we have been dating for years and I am so comfortable with you!” But instead of going with the flow of life, I am going to project my own insecurities I have with commitment on your ability to just be someone who adapts to situations, enjoys calm, talks to new people as if they have been friends for years, and just take it a minute at a time. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/you-make-m...

You can say I miss you to someone within the first few minutes of meeting them, but what are you truly missing? I think I have always thought it would be nice to miss someone or just default to saying it as a kind way of saying I was looking forward to seeing them again. However, I am starting to realize that I may have been using it wrong, missing the idea of what I saw as a glimmer of hope of wh...

But this who “Don’t try too hard” mentality is ridiculous. Compounded by the ability to hide behind inflectionless texts and the prospect of the next swipe, we are not even trying at all, let alone “too hard”. https://www.lostintxtlation.com/define-too-hard/