Live from the Break Up Room Podcast

Anything can happen... This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit asquill.substack.com/subscribe

The city never sleeps and neither do I... The love of a city returned to the sender. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit asquill.substack.com/subscribe

You looked pretty wearing the love I gave you. And I fell in love with that image of it—with the illusion that something so visually perfect must also be emotionally right . … when I saw that picture of you from March 16th, something shifted in a way I didn’t expect. I recognized you, but it wasn’t immediate. Everything about you was recognizable. But ... You were no longer pretty for me to look a...

I once told Mr. Andrews that I wished I could have been there when he graduated the EMT Academy. He reassured me it’s “not like I was missing anything”, or somebody else had taken that place because he “didn’t haveanyone in the audience” for him. And I cried. Because I was so proud of him. Especially knowing his story. How could no one want to sit there and applaud him? I wished so badly I could g...

Your hands knew how to hold lives, but not us. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit asquill.substack.com/subscribe

It's been three months since you broke up with me, and to say I've had no desire for intimacy would be putting it lightly. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit asquill.substack.com/subscribe

Even if we’re not dating, even if we never have a family of our own, you’re still very intertwined in my life and everything I know. You may not be present in my life every day, but as long as I’m alive, I know you’re never fully going to go away. And I’m trying to learn to let that feel okay. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus epi...

Do you know what it’s like to start falling in love with yourself, your potential, and life because of the encouragement of the person you love—to be the healthiest version of yourself in years! And then have the person you trusted and changed for tell you you’re mere existence is now too much for them? Well, I do. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or g...

You never asked me to be your personal Harley Quinn. That’s the part I have to be honest about… I became more than your Harley Quinn— I became your Arkham Asylum. Holding it all in for you. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit asquill.substack.com/subscribe

But maybe, just maybe, February isn’t cursed… Maybe it’s just honest. It’s that last bit of frost that needs to melt before the healing season. And depending on how you look at it, it’s the end of cuffing season. The frost is melting. People want to rediscover themselves. I’m coming to understand maybe Mr. Andrews needing more freedom. Maybe February is just that last moment before the first blade...

I promise… This is only half click-bait. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit asquill.substack.com/subscribe

Anyone can look up Timothy and see his story, his legacy. Anyone can watch videos and news reports… Read the articles written while New York was mourning. Anyone with a semi-decent memory who watched it live will remember the tragedy— how much it circulated… Even if all they remember now is his face on the TV. But no one can look you up, Rescue Medic Andrews, and see how this tragedy effected you;...

I saw a video just before posting this— some gimmicky “he’s hurting, too” tarot type thing— and the song playing in the background was “I Don’t want to Live Forever” by Zayn and Taylor Swift. I got to thinking as I was recording this… “I got one thing stuck in my mind… Wondering if I dodged a bullet or just lost the love of my life…” I’ve had so many say I did— dodge a bullet. But I swore for 18 m...

*If someone can help me figure out why it upped the pitch of my voice so I (and he) can never sound like this again, I’d appreciate it! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit asquill.substack.com/subscribe

What do you all think? You have 2 hours to message @woodysrightboot your opinions… This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit asquill.substack.com/subscribe

For those grieving and actively healing, I hope this becomes a place where you feel safe and understood. Here’s to all the things I need to tell myself and you. Here’s to all the things I wish I could have said and still wish to tell, Mr. Andrews. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit asquill.substack.com/subscribe