Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler

My friend Blaire Ostler joins us to talk about her new book called Queer Mormon Theology (https://www.amazon.com/Queer-Mormon-Theology-Blaire-Ostler/dp/1948218410). Blaire has wonderful insights into how to understand, see and support Queer Latter-day Saints. One of my favorite sections is 15 ways to be more inclusive for our queer friends. Thank you Blare for being on the podcast and all your goo...

My friend Dashiell Miner joins us to better see and love all of God’s children. Dashiell, who is at BYU studying microbiology working towards being medical doctor in oncology, shares four topics: 1) Surviving brain surgery at age 9 and having a life-long hearing disability. Dashiell talks about how this shaped his life to have more empathy and understanding for others 2) Dashiell’s talk in this Wa...

My friend Chauncy Brinton (in his early 40’s, Army Psychologist, Doctorate from James Madison University) bravely and vulnerably shares his journey so he can help others. Chauncy talks about unwanted sexual behaviors—compulsive masturbation and gay pornography use—and why this happened in his life and his path to healing. Now in his 40’s, Chauncy has connected many of the dots to understand why th...

My friend Bryce Johnson joins us to share his story. Bryce is an active Latter-day Saint and is honest that he doesn’t know exactly his future. He shares he could marry a man or marry a woman—and is looking for is people in his life that love, support and accept him. That are not telling him how to live his life—but walking with him in his journey. Bryce shares coming out to his parents at age 12,...

My friend Karim Lazarus (age 50, living in Baltimore) vulnerably shares his life story. Karim shares growing up in a single-parent home, being sexually abused (which he shares did not make him gay), finding his home in a military high school in Virginia and attending the Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs where he joined the Church. That led to Karim, after one year in the Church, courageously...

My friend Tate LeBaron (active LDS, in his late 20s) shares the day four years ago when he almost died by suicide and what helped him out of that hopeless and dark place. Tate starts the podcast by reading a Facebook post from May 2021 (https://www.facebook.com/tate.lebaron/posts/10159058075777432). Tate also bravely shares about this battle with pornography and how that came into his life and wha...

My friend Daryl Austin is a journalist based in Utah. His work has appeared in National Geographic, The Atlantic, The Wall Street Journal, Psychology Today and The New York Times. On the podcast, Daryl talks about several of his articles to help us better understand social issues, reduce divisiveness and the reasons to celebrate our differences. Here are links to the articles discussed: Deseret Ne...

My friend Josh Pedersen, who came out as gay at 21 following his successful LDS mission in England, talks about his Kickstarter where you can pre-order his new booked called “OUT, NOT IN!” Josh, who is a full time Professor of Design, wrote the book to help LGBTQ people struggling to find their voice come out, and also to their families and close friends to gain a more empathetic understanding. It...

My friend Drew Young (who was on episodes 276 and 325) joins us to talk about his new book called “Stand Guard at the Door of Your Mind” which is available for pre-order at Amazon (https://www.amazon.com/Stand-Guard-Door-Your-Mind/dp/B0933GP1RY/). In the book Drew discusses many topics including suicide, porn, mental heath and bullying. In our podcast Drew opens up and enduring multi years of bull...

My friends Bree and Kit share their story as a couple with Bree’s gender incongruence/gender dysphoria. Bree talks about the shame, guilt and fear of 40+ years dealing with this and then eventually coming out to Kit. Kit and Bree talk about how their marriage is now even stronger and how they are moving forward. Bree talks about what it is like to deal with gender incongruence and the relief, heal...

My friend Dallas Campbell shares his story as a gay Latter-day Saint. I became aware of Dallas from his moving Instagram coming out post www.instagram.com/tv/CNTnG5thfbW Dallas talks about knowing he is gay from a young age, some difficult times in high school, serving a wonderful mission in Guatemala, testimony of the Gospel, trying to date women, and receiving personal revelation he needed to co...

My friend Connor Berg (grew up in South Weber, Served a mission in the Jacksonville Florida Mission, currently at Utah State) shares his journey. Connor talks about growing up and learning he is gay in a world that makes it difficult to be gay. That led to years of shame, self-harm and depression. Connor eventually came out to his family (very supportive) which led to a path of therapy, hope and h...

My friends Dason and Taylor join us to share principles about how to keep relationships together when one goes through a faith crisis/transition. Dason and Taylor were friends growing up in Lethbridge, Alberta, Canada and both served missions. After they both got married and started families, they lost contact until Dason’s Facebook post in 2019 about this faith transition. Taylor reached out to D...

My friend Tony Fieldson, who was on Episode 359, shares 10 keys for responding to your loved one’s questions or faith transition (see Tony’s video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lm3visvgAFk). Tony also talks about The Restoration Table Facebook group (https://www.facebook.com/groups/720024265292786) and its goals to implement these 10 keys among its members (comprised of active Latter-day Sain...

My friend Bo Buchi (masters degree, licensed clinical therapist) talks about his role as a therapist to help clients use the Gospel of Jesus Christ to improve their lives (including ending pornography use and living the law of chastity). Bo also talks about listening to the right voices (our leaders, scriptures) to make the hard decisions to improve our lives. Bo explains the psychological princip...

My friend Tom Fairholm (who recently graduated from BYU with degrees in music composition and Russian) shares his story as a gay Latter-day Saint. Tom, who has deep testimony of loving Heavenly Parents, the Savior, the Book of Mormon, talks about coming out to his parents in his teens (good experience), serving a mission, trying to make dating women work, and coming out more broadly earlier this y...

My friends Elin and Randy Dastrup join us to talk about Randy’s life-long battle of feeling broken and having no worth. This partly resulted from being a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. Randy (who served a mission in Puerto Rico) talks about his battles with pornography and having an affair. Elin and Randy share the moment Randy told Elin about the affair, how they kept their marriage together...

In anticipation of the upcoming North Star Conference, on June 10th-13th, my friends Ty Mansfield and Jeff Bennion join us to share their story of the founding of North Star—how and why it all started. They share the goals, vision, and mission of North Star, as well as address some common misconceptions about North Star. Ty and Jeff also share some of their personal stories as Latter-day Saints na...

My friends Jordan and Adam share their journey as gay Latter-day Saints. Jordan and Adam served missions, completed college, have strong careers, have been together for three years and now feel their path is to get married. While we all understand their path is outside the doctrine of our Church, this episode is about how to come together in our differences as the same human family, reduce divisiv...

My friend Jed Alldredge shares his story about being the parent of a gay son, Jeffrey Alldredge (episode 270). Jeffrey came out at age 12 to his parents Jed and Starlyn—which is over 15 years ago. Jed has been on this road for a longtime and has wonderful insights into being the parent of a gay son. Like all families, there are some difficult moments and some great moments. The Alldredge family st...

My friend David (gay) and Ann (straight) Rickey share their journey. David, who kept the shame of his sexual orientation to himself for over 40 years, decided the time was right to come out to Ann in 2012 while serving as a Bishop in Nevada. Ann and David talk about the difficult and painful days that followed—but the joy, happiness and peace that is now in their marriage and lives. It is a beauti...

My friend Emerson Fersch, recently released as Stake President in the California Long Beach East Stake, talks about ‘creating Zion’ in his stake where everyone felt welcome, loved and needed. That included a significant outreach to LGBTQ Latter-day Saints in his stake—as well as working to make sure other groups who often feel on the margins feel a sense of belonging. Emerson also talks about his...

My friend David Woods (early 60’s) and his niece Bekah Clements (married mother of three, HR Director) share their story. David (who served a mission in Switzerland) talks about being gay in Utah, moving away from Utah and leaving the Church, developing a successful multi-faceted career, returning to the Church after being out for several decades, moving back to Utah (where he is currently serving...

My friend Kristen Reber (active LDS, married mother of three) joins us to talk about her early release from her mission 10 years ago. Kristen talks about the myriad of feelings that accompanied that experience including anger, pain, relief, and feelings of failure and frustrations with that experience. Several years after her early return, Kristen, realizing others are walking the same road, wrote...

My friend Sharla Goettl joins us to talk about her outstanding new book called “Spiritual Resilience: Leading Our Youth to Go and Do”. This wonderful book is for LDS parents and will give you added tools, learned from Nephi's teenage years, to help guide your own children. The book is available at Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B08T8L88TV or from Sharla’s web site at www.sharlagoettl....