Life and Love in La Ville

I’m literally scared to be at a festival where a known, multiple-time offender of inappropriate touch is wandering around invisible in the crowd. It triggers me to the core. It’s already hard to meet strangers and ask them to be safe with your body in crazy-ass moments and protect whatever triggers you may have, but this has made it much, much harder. I have felt, to put it somewhat dramatically,...

June 18th, 2023: “Why didn’t you just say something?” asked Patrick. I almost retorted, wow, that’s very victim blamey. Instead I said, “Have you ever been harrassed and gaslighted by a narcissistic boundary-breaker?” He shook his head and gave an honest “no.” Image Credit: Yours Truly

As Mommy’s Baby Girl in chastity for healing and sexual liberation, I’d like to dial our physical relationship down to the beginning, so that I can approach my body and my sexuality from a fresh slate. My hope is that in the long run, it will allow you and I to have a path toward pleasure that is without pressure for either of us. So that we can simply learn each other, and enjoy, however that fee...

One of the biggest problems with issues of interpersonal violence is that nobody wants to be branded “the bad one,” as though the only person who can break consent is a villain in a Hollywood movie. The truth is much more nuanced than that; we are a product of our experiences. Consent is complex, and varies from person to person and moment to moment. Sometimes even with the best intentions, we cau...

So. Roo and I have been talking, and he says I shouldn’t be giving you unsolicited advice. I said, “Yes, but aren’t you worried about Papa not being able to get out of his chair one of these days?”… Image Credit: Yours Truly

June 5th, 2023:  I just got my hair cut. Only the tips are a reddish-orange still, the lingering remains of my purple hairdo for Greece two summers ago. I’m recovering from my weekend. Too many things all at once… Image Credit: Yours truly

May 15th, 2023:  In which I argue with the weather channel, care for my garden, and consider how to fix my flawed explanation of BDSM so my mother will love Dee again. Image Credit: Yours Truly

Monday, April 24th, 2023: I gave my mom the link to my Medium stories. This link specifically. I figured it was a pretty safe place to start. Before I did it, I told her that I call Dee “Mommy.”  Image credit: Yours truly

May 13th, 2004: Isaac [11 years old at the time. Now a molecular engineer] has become very concerned with making “good time." He got really upset when we stopped to eat for only some of the group while others weren't hungry. This would necessitate another stop, which would be, he informed us, "extremely inefficient." Photo by Jake Nackos on Unsplash

April 2nd, 2023: In which I pine over the cute boy (i.e. The Man Orbit), deal with my dysfunctional family and try to enjoy my birthday month Photo by Emma Dau on Unsplash

April 3rd, 2023: At first, he was all the way at the other end of the table, which was fine with me because I had forgotten how to talk. Also, Imadake is fricking loud. Like, unnecessarily loud, so loud you have to… Photo by Pierre Bamin on Unsplash

Friday, March 31st 2023: If that show really wants to know whether or not Love is Blind, why do they get all dolled up for the big reveal?? Seriously. They get to know each other behind a wall, propose marriage sight unseen… It’s got nothing to do with lack of physical attraction and everything to do with Can we survive a massive dating clusterfuck. And then they all live together, guided by some...

August 28th, 2021 Dear Family, I'm a great lover of dialectical discourse and free speech, but in an effort... In which I try to prepare for a family reunion by offering some creative non-violent communication. Photo by Art Rachen on Unsplash

Saturday, March 11th, 2023: All winter, the mountain of snow has been accumulating as the plows pile all the extra snow into a gigantic mound reaching high into the air, clearing the streets and the sidewalks. But the snow is… Image credit: Yours truly

Saturday, February 25th, 2023: I need boundaries with my massage therapist. In other news, Mistress Me bought me mango popsicles. Also, maybe one day I'll be able to be kinky again. Image credit: Adam Bartoszewicz on Unsplash

January 22nd, 2023: "I want to see you manage your feelings in a way that they do not pose a threat to the people around you. Please stop the abuse. Please stop hurting my friend." (In which I write a very long letter to Richard, and in the process, lose my Montreal home.) Image credit: monkeyoutside on Unsplash

Tuesday, February 21st, 2023: My stomach just yowled at me so I’m feeding it this yummy banana bread I found. It tastes faintly of burnt walnuts. Willow called me today while I was doing yoga. I had ignored my body… (In which I try not to go crazy while Willow tells me fake news stories and my sister is...my sister. I teach Willow how to channel her rage.) Image credit:  Jeff Siepman on Unsplash

February 19th, 2023: In which Gale and I discuss Richard's admission of emotional manipulation. I try to convince her that his feelings are not her responsibility. I'm not very successful. Image credit: Zohre Nemati on Unsplash

February 11th, 2023: “Can we trade places?” he asked me from under his fringe. He looked tall until I realized that he was using my muscle-roller as a skateboard. I say goodbye to felix and ponder puppies and abuse... Image credit:  Nik on Unsplash

February 2nd, 2023:  In which I fly away from the blazing sun of Panama and land in Montreal winter, to contend with emails, chase some sunbeams, and live as the mad artist I am.  Image credit: Yours truly

Friday, January 13th, 2023 Friday the 13th Costa Rica. Panama. Transparent circus pants and a thongs. This is the story about slutty clothes, suitcases, and Central American taxi drivers. Image credit: Yours truly

Circa 2011 I thought my speech for Dajuan and Juliette's wedding was funny, and maybe it was? Image credit: Yours truly "You meet your destiny on the road you take to avoid it"-Carl Jung

December 24th, 2022:  I dreamt about his wife the other night. I remembered the dream vividly, from beginning to end. How pretty she looked. How pregnant. How proud... Image credit: Yours truly

December 17th, 2022: I'm waiting at home in a blizzard to see if Mommy will come, since Mistress didn't. All my drawbridges are up. I write about family dysfunction an fitbits. Image credit:  Colin Lloyd on Unsplash

May 22nd, 2022: Oh yes! I thought I’d open up with a very dramatic start. That’s how we do it in this family, isn’t it? We do things VERY dramatically. THIS IS OUR FAMILY AND WE COULDN’T BE PROUDER. IF WE WANT TO… Image credit: Deon Black on Unsplash