Less Drama More Mama

Have you ever looked at your child and thought, "Wow. You're so much like me"? At first, that recognition can feel sweet. You understand them in a way other people might not. But it can also create some blind spots. You may think you know what they're feeling, what they need, or why something matters so much to them, when part of what you're seeing is your own history. In this week's episode, I'm...

Have you ever reacted to your child and wondered afterward, "Why did that feel so big?" The thing they did was small. Your reaction was not. This week, I share the story of a mom in my program who had a huge reaction over a tray of sliders. She came to coaching convinced she knew exactly why she'd reacted. She was only partly right. Minutes into our session, we weren't talking about sandwiches any...

For years on this podcast, when I've talked about my dad, it's been in the context of understanding myself, my patterns, and some of my struggles. Most of us carry complicated feelings about our parents. We can wish some things had been different and still be grateful for what they gave us. Both can be true. This week, in honor of Father's Day, I'm sharing the parts of my dad and our relationship...

"Mom, I'm bored." "There's nothing to eat." "Can you drive me?" "He's touching my stuff." It's 10 a.m. and you've already refereed two arguments and answered the same question four times. And there are still nine more hours until bedtime. Summer sounded so relaxing back in May.  No morning rush, lunches to pack, or homework to oversee. But those pressures just got replaced by different ones: const...

Over the past 14 years of coaching moms, I've learned a lot and changed my mind about a few things. You might assume I'm talking about time-outs, sticker charts, rewards, consequences, or some other parenting strategy. The truth is, my views on those things haven't changed all that much. What has changed is where I begin with a client and my understanding of why it's so hard to put good parenting...

From the outside, you look like you're doing fine. Maybe even great. So why does it feel like you're one "that's not fair!" away from losing it? It's the difference between two things that look similar from the outside, but feel nothing alike on the inside. One of them is exhausting. The other creates a little more ease and a little less struggle. In this episode, I'm breaking down which one you'v...

Today's episode is the final one in the Mental Health Awareness Month podcast collaboration I organized with a few other parenting and mental health podcast hosts. We each chose one episode from our own show to share on the others' podcasts throughout the month. This episode comes from Dawn Friedman's podcast, Tell Me It Will Be Okay . Dawn has worked with kids and families for more than 30 years...

"I don't want to go." "Can I just stay home?" "I don't even care about that anyway." When your anxious child says these things, it can feel kinder (and easier) to let them skip the party, stay home from school, or avoid taking the bus. But short-term relief often creates bigger anxiety in the long run. For Mental Health Awareness Month, I'm sharing an episode from Cynthia Coufal's podcast, The Tee...

Since May is Mental Health Awareness Month, I put together a small podcast collaboration with a few other hosts who talk about parenting, anxiety, and emotional health. Each week, I'm sharing one of their episodes here on the podcast, followed by a few of my own thoughts on what stood out to me and how it applies to you. Today's episode comes from Leah Davidson's podcast, Building Resilience . Lea...

You've probably heard the phrase, "If you don't ask, you don't get." And yet, asking for what you want can feel surprisingly hard. You hint. You wait. You hope someone notices. And when they don't, you end up feeling frustrated, unseen, or resentful. When you don't ask, you don't just miss out on what you want. You limit how much support you allow yourself to have. This comes up a lot around Mothe...

Divorce is often talked about as a legal process or a decision between two adults. This week's episode shifts the focus to your child's emotional health. My guest, Erica Komisar, is a clinical social worker, psychoanalyst, and parenting expert who has spent decades helping families through divorce. She says that divorce itself isn't what harms children most. It's the instability, conflict, and dis...

What can Japanese parenting teach us about raising calm, capable kids? This week, I'm talking with Lisa Katayama, author of The Japanese Way of Parenting: What It Taught Me About Raising Mostly Calm, Caring, Capable Kids . Lisa was born and raised in Tokyo and now lives in Northern California. In our conversation, we talk about what stood out to her as she raised kids in the U.S. while drawing fro...

Have you ever been in a situation with your child where you can feel it escalating while it's happening? They're getting more upset, you're talking more, explaining more, trying to get things back on track, and at the same time, you can tell it's not helping. In this episode, I'm breaking down five common things moms do that feel right in the moment, but make things worse. These are the patterns t...

Four hundred episodes. For this one, I did something I've never done before. I asked you to send in your parenting questions by voice message, and I answered them on the show. This episode covers six real questions from moms in my community. We talk about things like a five-year-old's defiance and name-calling, feeling overwhelmed when everything feels urgent, high-conflict co-parenting exchanges,...

In today's episode, I'm sharing seven things loving moms do. These are the same things I teach inside Damn Good Mama, and they're what help moms start showing up differently at home. Of course, you love your kids deeply. But how do you show that love when your child is upset, pushing back, or not listening, and you can feel yourself getting pulled into a reaction you don't want? I walk through eac...

Your child is perfectly fine at home. Relaxed. Talkative. Maybe even sweet. Then you show up at school, wave a little too enthusiastically, and suddenly you're getting an eye roll, a sharp "Mom, stop," or something worse, right in front of their friends. When your child is rude to you in front of other people, it can leave you feeling embarrassed, hurt, and confused. Learn why this happens (especi...

Boys and girls move through the tween years very differently. They handle friendships, express emotions, and start testing their independence each in their own ways. And if you don't know what to expect, it's easy to misread what's going on. In this episode, the third in our tween series, I share what the research says about how tween boys and girls differ and what I saw firsthand as a therapist a...

The topic of puberty can feel intimidating for a lot of moms.  Between their child's mood swings, body changes, and sudden self-consciousness, many parents aren't quite sure what to expect or how to talk about it. This episode addresses how you can support your child through this stage with more confidence. Puberty is about much more than physical changes. It's emotional, social, and relational to...

The tween years don't just change your child. They change you. Around ages 9 to 12, your child begins the important developmental work of identity formation. They start caring more about their friends, forming stronger opinions, and creating more space between you. This shift can feel just as big for you as it does for them, and it requires a different kind of presence from you. The moms who come...

The nervous system is complex. But you don't need a neuroscience degree to understand what's happening in your body when parenting gets hard. In this episode, I'm breaking down nervous system terms every mom should know, so your reactions stop feeling so mysterious. When you understand the language of your nervous system, you can recognize what's happening in your body much earlier. And that chang...

Picture two moms. They both work full time. They both keep track of schedules, appointments, groceries, school emails, and everyone's emotional temperature. They both have kids who talk back, make messes, and test limits. One mom snaps more often than she wants to. She yells, feels out of control, and then carries guilt. The other mom gets activated too, but she recovers faster. She repairs more e...

You know your triggers. You understand why certain things your kids say or do set you off. You've read the parenting books. You've listened to the podcasts. You know how you want to respond. And yet — in the moment — you still react. Why? Because survival patterns override insight. In this week's episode, I share how I shifted patterns in my love life — and how the same principles can apply to par...

Winter can be hard on moms. And right now, much of the U.S. is dealing with extreme cold, dangerous wind chills, school closures, and being stuck inside more than usual. When your world shrinks and your responsibilities don't, parenting can feel even heavier. In this episode, I break down why winter affects your mood, energy, and nervous system. You'll also hear four grounded ways to get through w...

The hardest part of parenting for me, especially as my kids get older, is watching them make a choice I wouldn't make and letting them do it anyway. I have to take a breath and remind myself—it's their lives, not mine. In today's episode, I share a personal story about a time when my daughter and I had very different perspectives and how I navigated the tension between trusting her autonomy and ho...

There are thoughts many moms have that feel too scary, shameful, or unacceptable to say out loud. Thoughts like: "I don't like my kid right now." "I can't do this anymore." "I wish I could just disappear." And almost immediately, those thoughts are followed by guilt, shame, or a voice that says,  What kind of mother even thinks this? That's what today's podcast episode is about. Not fixing those t...