Kim and Ket Stay Alive... Maybe

Kim tells Ket about the acclaimed Barbarian starring Bill Skarsgaardsaarsgard and Justin Longbeard. Ket thought the most she had to worry about was sharing an AirBnB with Pennywise. She was… mistaken. Just let Mommy give you her ole’ crusty teat! Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Barbarian. Dir. Zach Cregger Writer Zach Cregger Support the girls on PATREON for lots of awesom...

Ket tells Kim about the Thanksgiving Day classic, Pilgrim! And let me tell you, the horrors of family drama, political arguments ‘round the stuffing, white washing of the “first Thanksgiving,” are NOTHING compared to the horror… of METHOD ACTING! So come all ye Milgrims and Filgrims! Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in Pilgrim. Dir. Marcus Dunstan Writers Marcus Dunstan, Patri...

Kim tells Ket about Terrified starring everyone’s nightmares. Not that they needed another reason to be afraid of what’s under their beds, but the girls will only be skateboarding to and from them from here on out. If anyone needs help, Kim’s ready to ride by on her little help bike (Brrrring Brrrring) with a little helper’s note! You’re welcome! Also, the girls would like to politely decline thei...

Ket tells Kim about the new Hellraiser, out now, on Hulu! And it is exquisitely disturbing. The girls start off with a VERY exciting update about Ket’s… I mean, Kim’s personal life. The girls also have to go over very basic survival skills we should all know by now, like don’t go through a secret door in a creepy mansion. Also, there is a teacher shortage… Priestess Pinhead is ready to step in. Mo...

Kim tells Ket about The Strangers starring their childhood alums, Scott Speedman and Liv Tyler. Ket has definitely seen this before but… GOLDFISH BRAIN SAVES THE DAY AGAIN! We meet the newest member of The Burpsmap Family tree. Arik tries to be quiet and fails miserably and adorably. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in The Strangers.  Dir. Bryan Bertino Writer Bryan Berti...

Ket tells Kim about Werewolf by Night starring Gael Garcia Bernal. The girls are back together and it feels so good!! We have yet another applicant to Willy’s Wonderland: Ulysses Bloodstone is throwing his… uh… head in the ring. The girls really missed each other. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in Werewolf by Night. Dir. Michael Giacchino Writers Heather Quinn, Peter Cameron...

Ket tells a movie to… wait for it… podcast producer/editor/bestie/husband extraordinaire, Arik Martin! Kim is in Grease, playing Danny Zuko, in Greece, getting rave reviews. So, Ketryn told Arik about Final Destination, starring her (second) favorite thirst trap, Devon Sawa. THE SAMMIES ON PATREON PICKED IT! NOT HER! SHE’S NOT THAT MUCH OF A MONSTER! Anyway… we’ll learn if Arik will live or die in...

Kim tells… wait for it… MIKEY, from THE HORROR VIRGIN PODCAST, about Razorback! Ket is outta town and we’re tryin’ something a little fun and different. The girls have been wanting to do a collab with this pod for quite some time. Listen, it’s a great episode and Ket is totally chill and not jealous about it at ALL! Most importantly, we’ll learn if Mikey will live or die in Razorback. Dir. Russell...

Kim tells Ket about Sinister starring Ethan Hawke. Being the experts they are, their listeners are lucky to be able to learn such amazing parenting tips as “if your kid has night terrors, ya gotta send ‘em back to the kid store.” Also, why did no one tell them that Tommy Wiseau of “The Room” fame was in this?! Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Sinister. Dir. Scott Derrickson...

Ket tells Kim about Colossal starring Anne Hathaway and Ted Lasso. I mean, Jason Sudeikis. Ketryn confirms that she did, in fact, give birth to her cats. The girls also discuss how different this story would be if it happened in 2022, rather than the completely different world on the space time continuum known as 2015. Ketryn would also like to petition OnlyFans for more sandwich content. Most imp...

Kim tells Ket about Men starring Jessie Buckley, Rory Kinnear, Rory Kinnear and Rory Kinnear. Two weeks in a row, a momentous event takes place! The girls contemplate post-mortem biography titles. Ketryn finds it difficult to leave the moss, mushroom and manor of the tale, despite imminent danger. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Men. Dir. Alex Garland Writer Alex Garland V...

Ket tells Kim about the prequel to the story of the ultimate Creepy Crapbag Kid. The girls dive into Orphan: First Kill, out now on Paramount+, starring Isabelle Furhman, Julia Stiles, and real Daddy Daddy, Rossif Sutherland. Kim has an incredibly exciting KKSAM “first!” She also gets to play both sides of the kill. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in Orphan: First Kill. Dir....

Kim closes out the summer by telling Ket about Deep Blue Sea starring a tall stalk of corn (CORN!), Thomas Jayne, a city traffic light, MICHAEL Rappaport, Samuel L. Jackson, and “Mr. ‘99,” LL Cool J. The girls learn the difference between a squab and squall. They employ their tried and true couch measurement system to measure sharks and THEIR BRAINS. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will stay...

Summer travels continue for one more week for Kim and Ket! So, this week they’re re-releasing an episode from way back in 2019 where the girls covered... Orphan! Let’s all bone up on this one before the girls cover the prequel in an episode soon to come! Ep. 63: Orphan: “The Tale of the Revenge of the Creepy Crapbag Kid” Ket tells Kim about Orphan starring Vera Farmiga, Peter Sarsgaard and Isabell...

Kim tells Ket about the 1973 episode of Night Gallery starring Sally Field. Ketryn… umm… did not do well. To be fair she was a few seltzers deep… also she’s not very good at the game. This live show was for Horrible Imaginings Film Festival and the episode was chosen by the festival’s founder, Miguel Rodriguez. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Night Gallery: Whisper. Dir. J...

Ket tells Kim about the Hulu release, Prey. Listen… you heard it here first: Predator. Is. A. Daddy. And he does NOT skip leg day. He, also, appears to be on Demon Jerry’s family tree, according to Jerry’s recent 23andMe! Naru, played by Amber Midthunder, definitely deserves an induction into the Final Girl Hall of Fame. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in Prey. Dir. Dan Trach...

Kim tells Ket about The Hole in the Ground starring an Irish child that Kim wants to steal. They cover a plethora of topics! How should one source out their murders? What is the best way to make sure your child has an adorable Irish or British accent, despite not having one yourself? What kind of adorable decorations should we get for Kim’s “The Hole in the Ground” future baby shower? Lee Cronin,...

Ket tells Kim about The Resort starring Brock O’Hurn. Listen… movies are tough to make. The girls point out that Arik would definitely be responsible for Ketryn’s backpack. And if you really gotta get over a fence, at least consider going under it first. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in The Resort. Dir/Writer: Taylor Chien Listen to season 1 of our new horror trivia pod! KI...

Kim tells Ket about Goodnight Mommy and gives Ketryn yet another reason to not want a creepy crapbag of her own. Ket also tells the Sammies about her very own horror movie she lived through where her house was infested with the musical festival for Flies: Lilith Fair featuring Jimmy Buffet at Monsterpalooza. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Goodnight Mommy. Dir. Severin Fia...

Ket tells Kim about the 2018 Indian film, Tumbbad. Remember Sexy Goop Body, Frank, from Hellraiser? Well, you’ll never guess who we ran into! Sexy Goop Body’s Grandma! She… does not look great. The girls would also like to tell you about an exciting new business investment! It’s an opium den… but with Daddies. Less Opium. More Daddies. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die in Tumbb...

Kim tells Ket about the French film, High Tension, starring Cecile de France and Maiwen. The girls are back from their travels and hit the ground with giggles galore! They discuss the habits of rich French ladies and their gas station attendant escorts. They discuss the spectrum of bummerations and gettin’ your “grumbles.” Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in High Tension. Dir....

Recorded live in October 2021, Kim and their dear friend Paige -- @thehorrorlifecoach -- tell Ket about Puppet Master, starring… alcohol. Strap in, Sammies. If you think episodes are long-winded when they're sober… I mean, do you even KKSAM, bro?! Not gonna lie, Ketryn remembers NONE of this movie. ENJOY! Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in Puppet Master. Dir. David Schmoeller...

Hi Sammies! The girls have a bit of traveling to do, so we're bringing you a re-release from back in the DAY! In honor of our final “Pride” episode, here is a special edition of our 101st episode, Lyle, with an added snippet from our exclusive Patreon Post-Mortem we did for the film. Join our Patreon for the full video and hundreds more hours of BONE CON! (Bonus Content) https://www.patreon.com/ki...

Ket tells Kim about the steamy 1983 horror starring David Bowie, Catherine Deneuve and Susan Sarandon, continuing their “Pride Picks” for the month. The girls open the episode by stating that Kim is wearing trash on her head and knowing nothing about Tony Scott. Oh! How far the mighty have fallen. Ket also comes out as a Cape enthusiast… like that was news to literally anyone. They also encounter...

To commemorate Kim and Ket’s 200th episode, we are having our first official Sammie Awards! We’ll be handing out awards for “Favorite Episode,” “Best Voice Acting,” “Best Episode Title”, “Best Running Gag or Catch Phrase,” “Best Made Up Character Name,” “Best Jump Scare, “ "Best Word Salad," “Most Random Tangent” and “Creepiest Burpsmap.” We also have some very exciting special guest presenters! M...