Kim and Ket Stay Alive... Maybe

Ket tells Kim about the shudder original The Shed, starring Jay Jay Warren, Cody Kostro, and Sofia Happonen. The girls are  joining and opening for several bands and shan’t let their complete lack of musical prowess to deter them. Ket will be forced to place Kim in a time out - no LOVE ISLAND! But then she’ll need to build a russian doll shed. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will live or die...

Kim tells Ket about Daniel Isn't Real starring Miles Robbins and Patrick Schwarzenegger. So come join our very exclusive cult that no one is allowed to join. The entrance fee is making Ketryn cry with a chainsaw sound. Then you have to tell us our memes are funny and then if you pass, you'll be rewarded with a Cheesy Gordita Crunch. Most importantly, we'll learn if Ket will live or die in Daniel I...

Ketryn tells Kim about The Frighteners starring Michael J. Fox (national treasure), Trini Alvarado (not Andi McDowell), Dee Wallace (ET’s Mom), and Jake Busey (Gary Busey’s kid). Kim has adopted a new pet that won’t infringe upon her lease because it’s a ghost - a ghost dog. We discover one of Ketryn’s areas of expertise: fender benders. They also make an addition to their merch store: branded hol...

Kim tells Ket about The Curious Case of Benjamin Button starring Brad Pitt! (Just kidding! What is our podcast?) It’s Sam Raimi’s Drag Me to Hell starring Alison Lohman and Justin Long. As always, if you add Kim and Ket together, you get one full person and that person’s name is Mary Tyler Moore. The girls also have some questions for Sam Raimi and his mouth horror. What’s goin’ on, bud? Most impo...

Ket tells Kim about the film taking Shudder by storm, Host (2020), starring  Haley Bishop, Jemma Moore, Emma Louise Webb, Radina Drandova and Caroline Ward. Kim really changes her tune about a Cinq Seance by the end of this one. She can now be found floating in a baptism pool, filled with salt, for the rest of her existence. The girls get into a small tiff when Ketryn learns that Kim has no intent...

Kim tells Ket about Child’s Play starring Chris Sarandon, Catherine Hicks and Alex Vincent. The girls explore the benefit of putting kids on leashes and Ketryn warns against buying your children toys they want. There is apparently a macheted Jason man roaming Glendale and we discover what three things would summon the girls’ spirits. Most importantly, we learn if Ket will live or die in Child’s Pl...

Ket tells Kim about Teeth starring Jess Wiexler. This is a pick from our Patrons over at Patreon and it was… a doozy. (Trigger warnings abound!) The girls explain vampire doors, dick vampires, and evoke the powers of evolution and earth to insure their female descendants be blessed with toothed vaginas for the good of humanity. So let’s blow our smoke snacks and police our boning. BONG! Most impor...

Kim tells Ket about Lyle starring Gaby Hoffman and Ingrid Jungermann (Bergman?). They unveil their new podcast all about the riveting world of chairs and they try to get to the bottom of what they could have possibly done to piss off the mosquitos. They discuss the anatomical anomalies of ghost conceptions and ghost babies. And they debate whether or not the devil is a feminist. Most importantly,...

Kim and Ket recount 100 episodes of laughter, friendship and staying alive… maybe. Thanks to their #Sammies, they’ve made it this far and have no intention of stopping! The girls recount their favorite moments and hear voicemails from Sammies who chime in with their slayiest moments as well. Kim and Ket also announce a new Patreon tier benefit! All patrons will get a video link to the filming of T...

Ket tells Kim about The People Under the Stairs starring Brandon Quintin Adams, A.J. Langer and Ving Rhames. This movie turned Kim into a straight-up wet robot (what???). We explore when it is and isn’t appropriate to call people ‘mommy’ and ‘daddy.’ Spoiler alert: it’s NOT when they’re your brother or sister! It also becomes clear that Ketryn does not know what shotguns sound like. Most important...

Kim tells Ket about The Final Girls starring Malin Akerman, Taissa Farmiga and literally everyone else. Ket starts off the telling by offending their large Gertrude population. We also get to the bottom of Kim’s slow slide into full british jargon. There is also another glaring difference between the girls’ brains, but they both still ugly cried at this movie. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket...

Ket tells Kim about The Lighthouse starring Willem Dafoe (Jesus) and Rob Pattinson (Cedric Diggory). We start off the episode with Kim’s harrowing journey to the Coachella for ants. Then we segue into what inanimate objects one should fornicate with. The mystery of the mergina is FINALLY solved. But Kim is still less than enthused by the end of it all. Most importantly,  we’ll learn if Kim will li...

Kim tells Ket about The Invisible Man (2020) starring Elisabeth Moss. In quarantine, Ketryn has become a full blown goldfish with a 3 second memory. But they do coin a new phrase: The Sammarmy. They protect the girls from a litany of internet trolls and they’re so grateful. So join The Patron Saint of Music and Edward Meat Tenderizer hands. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live or die in...

Ket tells Kim about Slaughterhouse Rulez starring Michael Sheen and Simon Pegg. It should have been Harry Potter meets horror. Instead it was confusion meets indigestion. Kim ends up having to carry her own donkey the final stretch and Ketryn gets sucked into her own personal Adam Scott Mandela Effect. In this time of perpetual turmoil, we all just want a pint of ice cream but that doesn’t mean yo...

Hi Sammies, we will not be releasing an episode today. This is our time to listen and to step up to support our black brother and sisters. Here are some links on ways we can engage and educate ourselves during this time. Join Kim and Ketryn in learning how we can be the best allies we can.  #BlackLivesMatter #JusticeForGeorgeFloyd #SayTheirName   Ways To Help from Black Lives Matter: blacklivesmat...

Kim tells Ket about The Lodge starring Riley Keough. The girls find them in a purgatory-like, snow space yet again. We learn that Kim’s 80’s ghost has been cheating on her and is engaged. Speaking of ghosts, the girls weigh in on who would be a better lay: ghost or demon? They’ll also discuss the venn diagram of their subsequent interests and discover that neither of them may be cut out for step-m...

Ket tells Kim about The Ritual starring Rafe Spall, Arsher Ali, Robert James-Collier and Sam Troughton. Kim teaches us all the British slang she’s learned over the years being a “right slag.” They try to decipher who each of their friends would be on this Lad’s Holiday that they would never go on (Kris is Dom). The girls also get a visit from The Village People. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ki...

Kim tells Ket about The Conjuring 2 starring Vera Farmiga and Patrick Wilson. The girls discuss the Mandela Effect (which I could swear they’ve discussed before - but maybe that was in an alternate universe… like the one where Berenstein Bears is spelled wrong.) We get a glimpse into Ketryn’s troubling parenting ethos and we vow to burn all recliners. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Ket will live...

Ket tells Kim about the Fangoria film, Porno, starring Jillian Mueller, Robbie Tann, Larry Saperstein, Glenn Stott, and Evan Daves. Welp, the girls wanted to see more dick. Man, did they get it. Yeesh! But besides that, the girls want to remind you to shower before you go through the pearly gates of Heaven and to make sure you provide Heavy Metal Jeff with a death certificate of your loved ones. M...

Kim tells Ket about Slumber Party Massacre (thanks to their amazing Patrons!) starring Michelle Michaels and Robin Stille. It starts off rocky. They forget to cheers and therefore have to start the episode over and then Ketryn almost kills Kim with a crotch shot. They search, in vain, for a dick and the search is lead by a horny, 29 year-old pre-teen. But at least pizza is $6… oh, wait. Most impor...

Ket tells Kim about Harpoon starring Munro Chambers, Christopher Gray and Emily Tyra. The girls are still in quarantine and they’re gettin’ weird with it. Ket is buying too many pillows, getting weighed against her will, and erecting a gauntlet for Kim’s suitors. Kim is existing outside of space and time and all that exists for her is the here and now… apparently. So let’s drink some seagulls and...

Kim tells Ket about Tucker & Dale vs. Evil starring Tyler Labine, Alan Tudyk and Katrina Bowden. The most important lesson we can learn is that being named Chad is not your fault… not changing your name, is. The girls reiterate the importance of  learning where the safety is on ALL GUNS. And Ket changes the theme of Kim’s hypothetical wedding to a “Tucker & Dale” theme. Most importantly, w...

Ket tells Kim about Repo (not man)! The Genetic Opera starring Anthony Head, Paul Sorvino and Bill Moseley. It’s their first remote recording since that quarantine life began and they miss each other’s faces. The girls contemplate starting the KKSAM band. Ketryn goes through a very complicated ‘Giles’ journey and they realize that sometimes the only solution is to just head straight to the moon. M...

Kim tells Ket about Bliss starring Dora Madison, Jeremy Gardner and our buddy Graham Skipper. Let the girls transport you back to a far simpler time when we could leave our house and all we had to worry about was vampires on bath salts eating our faces. Kim will learn she can ‘sit some out’, Ket will learn she’s far too anal about rent to do drugs and neither will learn the difference between a jo...

Ket tells Kim about our Patreon Pick, A Tale of Two SIsters starring Soo-Jung Lim and Guen-Young Moon. The girls begin to process the world-wide quarantine (WASH YOUR HANDS AND STAY HOME!) and bring you some little positivities to help you get through. They also discuss the origin of hands and what games they’ll be playing in the nursing home together. Most importantly, we’ll learn if Kim will liv...