Intelligent Intoxication

I use the concept “quiet quitting” to describe the intentional decision to  create an internal boundary regarding what we are no longer willing to do, be, or what or to whom we’re no longer willing to grant access to, or determining the amount of space you need between you and another person in order to truly love and accept them and yourself at the same time. “Quitting” is not giving up - it’s de...

If you’re a mom of adult children and you’re feeling discombobulated after the holidays — this episode is for you. When your kids come home, life often shifts into anticipation mode. We look forward to their arrival, savor the time together, and then suddenly… they’re gone. And you’re left trying to restart your life again. In this episode, we talk about: Why the transition after the holidays feel...

In the second stage of motherhood, many women struggle to just “feel better”.  In this episode, we explore both top-down and bottom-up approaches to healing and wellbeing as the mom of adult children.  You’ll learn: What top-down work looks like (mindset, values, identity, belief-shifting) What bottom-up support includes (therapy, medication, nervous system care, lifestyle shifts) Why insight alon...

In this episode, we explore the subtle but powerful difference between anticipation and presence — and how it impacts your daily peace and joy as the mother of adult children in your second season of life.  Anticipation pulls your mind into the future, imagining what hasn’t happened yet. While it can create excitement, it often keeps us in a state of waiting, overthinking, or low-grade anxiety. Pr...

On tonight’s episode, we’ll discuss 10 more “gifts” a mother can give her adult children that cost nothing but create emotional spaciousness, safety, and connection. These acts of emotional generosity will help your relationship grow, breathe, and thrive. The Best Gifts a Mother Can Give Her Adult Children (That Money Can’t Buy) 11. A Soft Landing, Not a Sticky Trap Offering warmth, humor, listeni...

On tonight’s episode, we’ll discuss “gifts” a mother can give her adult children that cost nothing but create emotional spaciousness, safety, and connection. These acts of emotional generosity will help your relationship grow, breathe, and thrive. The Best Gifts a Mother Can Give Her Adult Children (That Money Can’t Buy) 1. A Life You Love and Live Fully A purposeful, engaged, meaningful life so t...

As the mother of adult children, it’s normal to experience challenges when they return for the holidays. Your new routines may be disrupted, your old roles may resurface, and both parents and children have expectations for the time spent together. Here are a few questions for your consideration: What are your expectations for the holiday season?  What are your adult children’s expectations? What r...

As the mother of adult children, it’s normal to feel occasional sadness and worry. But when sadness becomes depression, and worry is a symptom of anxiety, it’s time to consider getting help.  This episode helps you understand the difference between normal transitional feelings and signs that you may need additional support from a therapist or doctor. Key Takeaways: The empty nest is often describe...

So many women in the empty-nest season find themselves waiting to feel “ready,” “clear,” or “purposeful” before they allow themselves to feel happy.  In today’s episode, we explore a powerful reframe inspired by this Dan Sullivan quote from his best-selling book,  The Gap and the Gain: “Happiness is not something you pursue. Happiness is not somewhere in the future. Happiness is where you start, n...

Episode Summary Do you ever look around your quiet home and wonder, “What now?” Your kids are thriving, but you feel… stuck. It’s easy to measure your life by what’s missing — the noise, the busyness, the clear sense of purpose you once had. In this episode, we explore a powerful concept from Dan Sullivan’s book The Gap and the Gain - the idea that fulfillment comes from how far you’ve come, not h...

In this episode, we explore boredom — that restless, itchy feeling that something’s missing, even when life is calm. After years of being needed and scheduled, the quiet can feel both freeing and frustrating. Boredom isn’t a sign of failure — it’s a sign of readiness. Your soul is waking up and looking for new places to pour your energy and creativity. Key Takeaways: Boredom is restlessness withou...

In this episode, we unpack the quiet heaviness of apathy — that feeling of being flat, uninspired, or simply tired of caring. It’s not laziness or lack of motivation; it’s often your body and soul asking for rest. After decades of constant motion — raising kids, managing households, giving your all — apathy can surface when a major season ends. It’s the body’s way of saying, “I need to reset befor...

As our kids grow up and leave home, many parents find themselves reflecting on the past — replaying choices, wondering what they could have done differently, and questioning the paths they took.  In this episode, we explore the difference between guilt and regret — two emotions that often surface in the quiet of the empty nest, yet hold very different meanings and invitations. In This Episode, You...

In addition to struggling to redefine their identity/purpose and renegotiate their relationships and connections, empty-nesters may struggle to reimagine their new lifestyle and the structure of their days, weeks, and months.  They may feel: a loss of routine, structure, and a sense of accomplishment without daily parenting tasks. restlessness or boredom with too much unstructured time. temptation...

There are three common challenges for empty-nesters: Losing one’s identity or purpose Missing convenient, organic relationships/craving meaningful connections Struggling with a new lifestyle and daily structure Relationships can feel challenging for empty-nesters if they: experience marital/long-term partnership shifts—sometimes feeling like they’re living with a stranger now that it’s just the tw...

I’ve noticed these three common challenges for empty-nesters: Losing one’s identity or purpose Missing convenient, organic relationships/craving meaningful connections Struggling with a new lifestyle and daily structure Identity and purpose is challenging for empty-nesters if they: are feeling like they’ve lost their sense of self after decades of being “mom first.” don’t know what their gifts, pa...

When do you notice struggling to discern or communicate what you really need? Here are a few questions that might provide some much-needed clarity: Am I willing to give myself the permission to have and communicate my needs? Am I worried that I’ll burden someone else? If I weren’t afraid of being a burden, what might I actually ask for? Am I willing to give myself the same compassion I offer to ot...

What if you’ve yet to meet the version of you who will actually love and thrive in the empty  nest stage of your life? But you might be wondering - how do I meet that version? How do I get to know her? You begin by spending as much time as possible in the present moment. Ask yourself: Am I focusing on something that’s happening in the present moment? Is everything I’m experiencing right now figure...

It’s common for mothers of adult children to experience regret over having: worked outside of the home and missed time with their growing children left a career to stay home and raise children, thereby losing temporary or permanent professional traction We can either use regret as a catalyst to get curious about what we really value most and commit to creating that now, OR, we can stay stuck in di...

When we work from the “bottom up”, we clarify what we need to strengthen in our foundations in order to build a life that is sustainably enjoyable and satisfying.  As an empty-nester you may be tempted to fill your days, stay busy, or bring in tons of new things. But, I invite you to reflect on your last or current stage, and get curious regarding what activities, commitments, and relationships yo...

Confidence requires proof or evidence. Think of something you do really well and have evidence that you’re good at. You’re “confident” that you can do this thing well. Self-Confidence does NOT require evidence. It is the commitment to yourself that regardless of what happens or what someone else says or does, you will have your own back. We have our back by: Sleeping/resting Eating well/hydrating...

To champion and thrive in the empty nest stage, we must be willing to identify and prioritize the essential few activities, passions, and relationships that truly matter the most.  ““The way of the Essentialist means living by design, not by default. Instead of making choices reactively, the Essentialist deliberately distinguishes the vital few from the trivial many, eliminates the nonessentials,...

So often in dysfunctional families, the members cater to the most dysfunctional person in the group, allowing that individual to set the tone.  This can also occur in the workplace, friend circles, or in any group of people in which the members “walk on egg shells” to appease and/or prevent an emotionally immature reaction.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice investing yo...

We cannot delegate the determination of our value and worth to other people. It’s almost as if we’re acting like hourly employees in our relationships with others and people-pleasing them in order to be “paid” with admiration, validation, or respect.  We are the only ones who can determine our value and worth and create relationships that align with that value and worth.  As a life coach, I’ve det...

The difference between rest/playing doing impactful “work” is experiencing the fulfillment that only comes when we challenge ourselves to utilize our gifts and talents.  When we rest, we are prioritizing these types of rest: The 7 Types of Rest You Need When we “play”, are are engaging in these types of activities: Find Your Play Personality But, when we’re engaged in impactful, meaningful “work”,...