INSyed: Psychology, Simply

I deleted my entire to-do list out of spite. What filled the empty calendar afterward wasn't more guilt — it was everything I'd already done that never made the list. A story about contingent self-worth, the psychology of why winning and losing both hit harder when you tie them to performance, and what's left of you on the days you cross nothing off at all. Source: Wouters, S., Thomaes, S., Colpin...

I tried making fried vermicelli noodles for the first time and ended up with porridge. What surprised me wasn't the failure — it was how quickly I let it mean everything. In this episode, I explore all-or-nothing thinking, what the physics of energy has to do with resilience, and why ruining something is sometimes the only way to make it. Source: Understanding and Overcoming All-or-Nothing Thinkin...

You know exactly what you need to do. You've written it down, time-blocked it, maybe even colour-coded it. And yet — nothing starts. In this episode, I reflects on six hours of playing The Sims and the uncomfortable moment I realised my virtual self was outperforming me. Not because he was smarter or more disciplined — but because he was simpler. No hesitation. No "one more thing before I start."...

How letting my laptop die let me live. Burnout doesn't always announce itself with a collapse — sometimes it shows up as not caring anymore. In this week's episode, I'm coming to you five hours deep into a report, running on fumes and the wrong kind of determination, and what happened when I unplugged my laptop on purpose and worked until the battery died. Rest days exist for a reason. You're no m...

This one is different. I'm going back to where it all started — episode one. And reading it with fresh eyes, a year later and 10,000km from home. In this episode: the reason agency is still the strongest predictor of life satisfaction, the mistake I made framing hope and agency as opposites, and why hope is the invitation that agency walks through. As always — there's always more INSyed.

My shoelaces kept coming undone. On the third time stopping to tie them, I noticed a patch of grass I'd never really seen — despite walking past it every day. That's inattentional blindness: the brain's filter that helps us function, and quietly hides the world from us. This week, we look at what we've been missing. Reference List https://www.researchgate.net/publication/12620563_Gorillas_in_Our_M...

What if the thing holding you back isn't laziness — it's perfectionism in disguise? In this episode, I explore how the pressure to get everything right before we begin quietly narrows our thinking and kills our satisfaction. Drawing on a 2020 study on self-compassion as a remedy for maladaptive perfectionism, I share what it actually looks like to swap perfectionism for excellence — and why that s...

We don't always get to choose what happens to us. But we do get to choose what we do next. In this episode, I'm coming to you straight from a cancelled haircut appointment — and what started as a frustrating morning turned into a reminder of something I learned in my psychology lectures: the locus of control. We talk about what it means to know the difference between what's in and out of your hand...

We all have a moment where we sit down, ready to take on everything at once, and freeze. This week I share what my dissertation taught me about learning, growth, and why taking things one step at a time isn't a weakness — it's the science. In this episode: Why even the most capable people freeze when they take on too much at once The zone of proximal development — what it is and why it matters for...

What if the thing you're most afraid of is also the thing you're hoping for? In this episode, we explore the relationship between fear and hope — and why both can only exist in the presence of uncertainty. Drawing on cognitive reframing and research into how fear and hope function as motivators, this episode makes the case that the two aren't opposites. They're looking at the same thing from diffe...

The enemy in the quote isn't always who you think it is. Resentment is like drinking poison and hoping it kills your enemies — but what if you are the enemy? In this episode, we unpack the psychology of self-forgiveness, the difference between guilt and shame, and why letting yourself off the hook might actually be the most responsible thing you can do. In this episode: The guilt vs. shame distinc...

The psychology of self-talk and emotional sound The loudest voice you’ll ever hear is the one in your head. So what is it actually saying; what’s it doing to you? Researchers mapped 24 distinct human emotions from nothing but sound. No words. Just voice, and what I found in their data made me rethink every word I've chosen, and every word I've let go. In this episode: The vocal emotion study that...

We’ve all been there—staring at a blank screen, tempted to let AI do the heavy lifting. It’s fast, it’s easy, and it’s always right there. But is this digital shortcut actually a dead end for our brains? In this episode, we explore the “Crutch Effect” and why the struggle to find an answer is often more important than the answer itself. We dive into the research behind why AI-assisted practice can...

Why do we keep saying "yes" to everyone else while our own world quietly falls apart? This episode dives into the psychology of Sociotropy and the "fawn" response, revealing how the safety we try to buy with compliance eventually leads to total burnout. Have you ever felt like a lightbulb that’s been left on for too long—working perfectly for everyone else until the moment you flicker out? We ofte...

Why is it so hard to understand someone else's perspective, even when the "truth" seems obvious? This episode explores Theory of Mind and the Curse of Knowledge , revealing the psychological gap that fuels miscommunication and how we can bridge it. Have you ever felt the frustration of explaining something "simple" to someone who just doesn't get it? We often navigate life with a "clean map," forg...

Does scrolling through Instagram ever make you feel small or question your own worth? Why do we feel a "sting" when we see others succeed? In this episode, we explore the hidden mechanics of envy and the silent suffocation of comparison. We discuss how to identify the "Two-Way Road" of resentment versus growth, and why your most uncomfortable feelings might actually be the blueprint for your futur...

Have you ever looked back at your younger self and felt a sense of shame or confusion? Why did we act so impulsively? Why did everything feel so overwhelming? In this episode, we discuss the "biological mismatch" of the developing brain. We explore why our emotions mature on a highway while our logic takes the slow backroad, and how understanding this science is the first step toward true self-for...

“You don’t have to be worthy to be whole.” As we step into 2026, the pressure to "reinvent" ourselves is at an all-time high. We are told to set massive goals, build new habits, and essentially construct a "monument" to our own success. But what if that striving is actually keeping us from living? In this episode, we look at the hidden cost of perfectionism. It’s often viewed as a pursuit of excel...

Do you wake up feeling like your mistakes define you? In this episode, we explore Carol Dweck’s Mindset Theory and the "Museum of Failure" many of us accidentally build for ourselves. We discuss the concept of brain malleability and how a simple shift in perspective can turn your deepest regrets into a "sequel" you never saw coming. What we cover: The psychological difference between fixed and gro...

Why does doing something simple in public feel intensely terrifying? We often confuse that nervous, awkward feeling with incompetence, but the psychological research tells a different story. In this reflection, we dive into the science of Social-Evaluative Threat (SET) —the brain's alarm system that treats social situations with strangers as a threat to survival. We break down the vicious cycle of...

Do you ever feel fundamentally inadequate or not smart enough? That familiar, crushing feeling of being the "little fish" in a big pond is a real psychological phenomenon—and the good news is, it is not your fault. This episode introduces the Big Fish Little Pond Effect (BFLPE) and how you can actively reframe your environment to boost your self-confidence and motivation. We dive into the research...

In this thoughtful exploration, we ask: What if the weight we feel waiting for motivation is heavier than the effort of simply starting? Inspired by a simple lecture insight, we look at the psychological mechanics—from the neural reward system to how we perceive ourselves—that prove the first small step is the most critical. This is a reminder that you don't need a monumental burst of inspiration....