If Not For This Podcast

The holidays don’t come with a manual, especially when blended families, shared custody, and big emotions are involved.  In this episode, Jess and Jay unpack the real-life challenges of navigating family dynamics while keeping their children’s hearts at the center of it all. They share what it looks like to set aside their own expectations, embrace changing relationships, and create meaningfu...

This week, Jess sits down with Emily Sharkey, key voice of the Shark Farmer media world, for a fast-paced, funny, and heartfelt conversation. Shark Farmer is a storytelling hub spotlighting the real, raw, and often hilarious lives of rural America, spanning podcasts, radio, TV, and a whole lot of Midwest charm. Em talks about career plot twists, the chaos-and-charm combo of motherhood, and the mag...

This week, Jess grabs the mic to take you right into the heart of her beautifully blended life, joined by her guest, co-parent, and husband, Jay. Together, they unpack the wonderfully weird dynamics of merging families, comparing their totally different upbringings and how those backgrounds still clash, or blend, into their everyday routines and parenting choices. Jess gets real about what it’s be...

This week, Jess takes us on a wild ride through the messy, guilt-filled terrain of growing up Southern Baptist, where perfection was expected and mistakes were mortal sins. She shares how straying from those rigid expectations didn’t just ruffle feathers, it triggered a full-blown shame storm that left her questioning everything about faith, identity, and whether she’d ever be “good enough.” ...

In this episode, Jess sits down with her daughter Lily. They discuss Lily’s raw, real, and unexpectedly emotional journey into college life, the kind that doesn’t show up in the brochures. From the nerves of move-in day to a panic attack at a sorority picnic, Lily opens up about facing social anxiety head-on in a brand-new world. Jess offers an honest look at what it’s like to support your kid fro...

On this episode, Jess chats with author and counselor Summer Butler about the ups, downs, and everything in between of blended families. They explore how love doesn’t get divided, it multiplies, and how kids can thrive across multiple homes. Summer also shares her new children’s book, “Mallie’s Two Homes and a Deer Named Darla,” a comforting guide for kids navigating stepfamily life. Listen as Jes...

In this episode, Jess dives into the powerful connection between getting moving and feeling amazing, both physically and emotionally. She shares how working out isn’t just about muscles or stamina; it’s a secret weapon for clearing your mind, melting stress, and boosting overall well-being. Jess opens up about her own fitness journey over the past four and a half months, showing how sticking to a...

This week, Jess gets real about the power of vulnerability, the magic of genuine connection, and how both can completely change the way we experience life and relationships. She talks about moments of self-doubt and podcast jitters to the surprising clarity that came from honest conversations with the people who matter most. Jess explores why opening up about our struggles isn’t weakness, it’s whe...

What happens when two strong-willed “Alpha” personalities fall in love and try to do life together without (completely) driving each other bonkers? Jess gets real about the sparks that fly, not just the romantic kind, but the occasional post-vacation tension that pops up when the bags are unpacked, but the emotions… not so much. Jay joins her and they explore big revelations, like how moments of f...

In this episode, Jess opens up about what turning 45 has brought into focus for her, the beauty of self-acceptance, the power of imperfection, and the ongoing evolution that comes with age. She shares moments from her recent birthday and how they sparked deeper reflection on life, relationships, and the ways we show up for each other. She talks honestly about the ups and downs of marriage,  e...

This week, Jess invites you into a story that didn’t go as planned. What was supposed to be a recording session turned into a deep, unexpected conversation with a dear friend, showing how life’s detours often bring the richest moments of connection. She explores what it means to show up in your life’s arena, especially when things feel heavy, and shares gentle tools to help you navigate emotional...

Turns out, beauty can rise from the ashes (and messy custody schedules). This week, Jess dives into the wild ride of life post-divorce—and spoiler alert—it’s not all doom and gloom. She’s peeling back the layers on her story—messy stepmom moments, blended family chaos, and all. But instead of hiding the cringeworthy bits, Jess is owning them, because healing doesn’t happen on the surface. You’ve g...

Jay Norman is here! (Jess' man.) They talk about that one wild day when the family cat, Tommy, went missing—and how a simple pet search turned into this unexpectedly emotional rollercoaster. The kids got involved, everyone was on edge, and somehow it all made them reflect on what really matters in a family. Jess and Jay also go off on a tangent about a super awkward public moment—one of those thin...

What happens when two high school besties grow up, grow families, and still find time to laugh (and cry) through it all? In this episode, Jess and her soul-sister Amber take a walk down memory lane—complete with awkward teen moments and heartfelt confessions. From navigating the beautiful chaos of blended families to learning how to show up for each other in big life transitions, they crack open w...

Think: less “perfect morning routine” and more “how do I keep going when life is messy and motivation ghosts me?” Jess and Meg are diving deep into the beauty and struggle of caring for our bodies, minds, and hearts, especially in a world full of noise and distractions. Through some soul-baring stories and laughter, Jess and Meg explore the magic that happens when we stop doing it all alone. From...

This week, Jess gets real about what it’s like to return to her farming roots while juggling home renovations, self-doubt, and the ever-complicated world of family dynamics. From planting multiple varieties of corn (because why do things the easy way?) to learning the art of patience and communication, she shares the highs, the lows, and the unexpected lessons the land keeps teaching her. But this...

Ever feel like you’re starring in a movie written by your parents? In this episode, Jess and Courtney dive into the messy, beautiful journey of personal growth—unpacking how childhood experiences shape who we become (for better or... let’s be honest, sometimes for worse).  They’re getting real about fear, expectations, and those sneaky inherited narratives that hold us back. But don’t worry,...

This week, Jess and Jessie get real about the magic of community and connection—because let’s be honest, life would be pretty dull without it. They both share the weird and wonderful ways they have built deep friendships despite living miles apart, and how opening up (even when it’s terrifying) has led to some of their most meaningful relationships. Jess and Jessie also geek out about how the inte...

This week, Jess is digging into the lore. She gets real about how personal memories shape who we are—especially when it comes to motherhood and healing deep emotional wounds. Jess shares a story about her son that haunted her for years, a time when depression had her drowning in shame and self-doubt. It wasn’t pretty. But through therapy, self-reflection, and an unexpected reality check from her o...

Welcome to a messy, heartfelt, and slightly chaotic season premiere of the If Not for This Podcast! In the first episode, Jess gets real about why she hit "record" in the first place. She opens up about past struggles—relationships, identity, and the general rollercoaster of life—and how storytelling became her way of making sense of it all. This isn’t just a podcast—it’s a safe space for anyone f...