How To! with Mike Pesca

We're constantly getting bombarded with messages about our bodies: They're too big. They're too small. They're not muscular enough, not curvy enough, and so on and so on. Rebecca has lived in a bigger body all her life and she wants the messaging to stop. She's done all the things—followed plus-size influencers, deemphasized weight from her health goals, tried to rewire how she thinks about weight...

Andrew snores so badly that his cats won't sleep in the same room as him. He's desperate to sleep better at night, and breathe more easily during the day. On this episode of How To!, we bring on James Nestor, author of Breath: The New Science of a Lost Art , to share the history of why we breathe the way we do. Turns out being a "mouth-breather" is more than just an insult, it's harmful to our hea...

Small talk has a bad reputation. It's boring, shallow, and awkward. Who really wants to talk about the weather, again ? But, when done right, it can be a cornerstone of connection. In this episode, Carvell Wallace is joined by Susan McPherson , the author of The Lost Art of Connecting . Susan is going to help our listener, Bee, navigate the uncomfortable small talk that she endures everyday at sch...

Sometimes reading our news feeds can feel like getting hit by a semi-truck of devastating information, without really knowing how to respond. We can't always tune the world out, which means we need to figure out how to be an empathetic person within the chaos. In this episode, Courtney Martin is joined by public theologian and best-selling author , Nadia Bolz-Weber , as well as artist and activist...

When he's not working on How To! or coaching his daughter's basketball team, our producer Derek John loves to play in pickup games with friends. But a serious on-court injury has kept him on the sidelines for months. Now, as he prepares to return to the sport he loves, Derek is seeking tips on how to prolong his playing days while avoiding another injury. In this episode, author Jeff Bercovici joi...

Jonny is a 26 year-old bachelor whose cooking often leads to heartache (and for one ex-girlfriend, a stomach ache). Jonny admits he's a klutz in the kitchen, so we hooked him up with Sam Sifton , cookbook raconteur and head of the New York Times's Cooking section . In this episode of How To! we see if we can teach our love-lorn Millennial to cook one perfect meal. Is romantic bliss just a well-bro...

Here at How To! headquarters, we give and receive a lot of good advice. This year we learned to love our faces , started reading again , aced an interview , dealt with difficult parents , said goodbye to our pets , cooked chaotically , moved to a new country , navigated adult autism , and breathed like Navy SEALs . On this episode, co-hosts Carvell Wallace and Courtney Martin are joined by former...

Dan enlisted in the Army in 2003 during the early phase of the U.S. wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. He just retired after 20 years of service—and is adjusting to myriad challenges of civilian life while also managing PTSD, ADHD and new sobriety. On this episode of How To!, Bob Beard of Arizona State University's Center for Science and the Imagination joins us to talk about a new program that's helpi...

Allison is on the hunt for her next hobby. One that's satisfying. One that she can stick with. One that will fit into her family's very busy schedule. Except…maybe she's thinking about that last part all wrong. On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings on Eve Rodsky , author of Fair Play and Find Your Unicorn Space . Eve argues that drawing—and defending—boundaries for individual, creativ...

A parent's main job is to protect. But what happens when your parent doesn't protect you? What happens when they not only let bad things happen to you, but they doubt and dismiss you when you ask them for help? Our listener, Haylie, decided to go no-contact with her father after multiple attempts to reconcile their relationship. Now she wants to know how to grieve the death of the relationship. On...

On a recent phone call Shannon's mom didn't mince words: The only way she'd vote for Joe Biden is if Jesus himself comes down and tells her to. Growing up in a conservative household, Shannon understands her parents' support for Trump. But she no longer sees eye-to-eye with them and every time they talk about politics it turns into a fight. The result is a complete fraying of their relationship. I...

Hot flashes, fatigue, and vaginal dryness were some of Katie's first clues that her body was changing. Half the population will experience menopause, yet misinformation still abounds—with doctors ill-prepared to talk to patients about this major life transition. On this episode of How To!, journalist Susan Dominus joins us to share the knowledge she gained from working on her viral magazine piece,...

To celebrate their third wedding anniversary, Anjali and Rahul are each selecting a surprise activity to do together. This happy couple loves spontaneity, so they're concerned about someday growing bored in their relationship. They're also feeling pressure to mark the traditional milestones of marriage, including having kids. On this episode of How To!, authors Caryl and Jay Casbon join us to shar...

Our listener Abdullah has reached a plateau. A mid-career manager at a large electronics engineering corporation, he feels intellectually unstimulated. Even though Abdullah has a stable job with seniority, he dreams of going back to school and pursuing his true passion: economics. But with a family to support, should Abdullah make a risky leap? On this episode of How To!, host Carvell Wallace is j...

Kids generate so…much…stuff. A lot of it is memorable. Videos of their first words? So cute. Colorful drawings that progressively get better? Masterpieces. Trophies, stuffies, books? All valuable. The problem: There's no way to keep everything. So how do you figure out what to cherish and what to toss? On this episode of How To!, co-hosts Carvell Wallace and Courtney Martin bring in Nonnahs Driski...

The beginning of the school year is a gauntlet for Andrea, who coaches teachers for a living. She needs to get to know the 52 educators she'll work with in the coming months. All of them are new faces to her. Which means she's starting from scratch. Time is tight, so Andrea is wondering how to make every interaction count. On this episode of How To!, co-host Courtney Martin brings in Marlon Styles...

Camila is torn. She wants a partner. Someone who is ambitious. Someone who is financially secure. Someone who checks in with her at the end of the day. But most of her dates have turned out to be duds and she's starting to think she'll never find real romance. Should she keep searching for 'the one,' or should she focus on being happy on her own? On this episode of How To!, new co-host Courtney Ma...

Irina and her husband are more than $100,000 in debt. They're working to pay it off, but between monthly credit card bills, student loan payments, 401k contributions and spending on their new baby, their money is spread too thin. In this episode of How To!, Charles Duhigg bring on Rachel Cruze, a personal finance expert and author of Know Yourself, Know Your Money , to help Irina create a budget t...

Like many pet parents, Zak Rosen and his wife lived for years in a state of denial about their beloved dog, Rumi. Then they learned that Rottweilers only tend to live about eight to 12 years, and there was no denying it: Rumi is already in her twilight years. In the not-so-distant future, they'll have to make some truly tough decisions. On this episode of How To!, Zak seeks out advice about end-of...

Sarah is a part-time pet groomer who dreams of opening up her own business. Having worked long hours for low wages, she can't help thinking that she could earn more money and control her schedule if she starts her own pet salon. The only problem? Sarah has no idea where to start. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings in Mae Chan to guide Sarah. Mae is a business alignment coach who he...

Niky just isn't jibing with Spanish. She's tried courses, podcasts, apps, and even private tutors in order to make a connection with Spanish speakers around Toronto, at her job, and while traveling. But years into her language-learning journey, she's not even close to being fluent. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace introduces Niky to Luca Lampariello . A speaker of 14 languages, Luca is...

Katie was ready to graduate from college when the pandemic interrupted everything. Unceremoniously cut-off from her group of friends, she's now in a new chapter of her life but struggling more than ever to find her people. Katie's friendships at work feel surface-level and she's anxious about opening up too much for fear of rejection. On this episode of How To!, host Carvell Wallace brings in frie...

It's a family joke that Dave and his 13 year-old son are the same person. So when his son found out he is autistic, Dave realized that he, too, is on the autism spectrum. The label is a comfort—a reassurance that his personality "quirks" have an explanation. But, at the same time, it's led to all of these questions like should he tell people? What does this change, if anything? And how does he lea...

Susan never really got over saying goodbye to her eldest daughter, who left for college four years ago. She knew it would be sad, but she didn't expect to be nauseous. Now her youngest is applying to college, and she's already dreading drop-off next fall which makes her feel like a "pathetic loser." What can Susan do to prep herself for more heartbreak and a completely empty nest? On this episode...

Have you ever wanted to move to a new country? Picking up and starting over internationally can be rewarding, but also nerve-wracking. Our listener Sara has lived overseas for more than a decade, but she recently moved to Switzerland and is struggling to fit in. On this episode of How To!, founding host Charles Duhigg brings in Dr. Nassim Assefi who, amongst all of her interesting professional acc...