How to Get What You Want

Send us Fan Mail Almost every company is rolling out AI right now, but far fewer have any idea how to actually adopt it. That gap is where leaders are getting caught. The pressure is to cut costs and move fast, so the message becomes "everyone start using AI" with almost no conversation about how. Meanwhile, your team is picking it up at completely different speeds, and the differences s...

Send us Fan Mail Someone asks you to take something on, and before they've even finished, you've already said yes. You didn't check your calendar. You didn't ask if it was your job. And three weeks later, you're carrying work you never wanted and quietly resenting the person who handed it to you. That yes was automatic. And automatic isn't the same as generous. This e...

Send us Fan Mail Getting a no can throw you in a way that doesn't really make sense until you've felt it. You make the ask, it doesn't land, and suddenly you're quiet and a little off your game, and the worst part is how long that feeling sticks around afterward. What you might not realize is that the people in the room feel it too. They're not walking away thinking about...

Send us Fan Mail You've watched a colleague get tapped for the senior meeting, the stretch project, the introduction you didn't know was happening. And your first thought wasn't resentment, it was confusion. They know how hard you work. They know what you're capable of. So why aren't they picking you? Because people don't live in your head, and if you haven't tol...

Send us Fan Mail You keep delivering. You keep saying yes to more responsibility. And somewhere in the back of your mind, you tell yourself it's just not the right time to ask for the title, the raise, the recognition you've been waiting on. But on the other side of that silence, your boss isn't waiting with you. They're watching you perform and assuming you're fine. In th...

Send us Fan Mail You see a colleague get the stretch assignment. You think, "Good for them." And then, quietly, "Why not me?" That moment is where most people stop. But that question, "Why not me?" is exactly where a negotiator starts. Research shows 46% of managers don't even know what their people want next. That's not on them. That's on you knowing i...

Send us Fan Mail Most of us hear "office politics" and immediately distance ourselves. It sounds manipulative, underhanded, like something people with questionable integrity do to get ahead. So we opt out. We stay professional, stay quiet, keep our heads down. But opting out is still a choice. And while you're making it, someone else is in the room getting credit for your idea, volu...

Send us Fan Mail You've been thinking about a conversation for days, maybe longer, and when you finally walk in, something unexpected happens. The other person says something that catches you off guard, the energy shifts, and suddenly everything you planned feels out of reach. You end up agreeing to something you didn't mean to, and you spend the drive home wondering how it went sideways...

Send us Fan Mail You're ready for the client presentation, the meeting with your boss, the room full of people counting on you to speak. You rehearsed, you have a plan, and the moment finally comes. But the energy is tight, something feels off, and instead of pausing to read it, you push through anyway. The call goes hollow. And you know it the second it's over. That gap between what you...

Send us Fan Mail Seventy percent of people experience imposter syndrome at some point, and it hits hardest in high achievers. The more capable you are, the wider the gap feels between how others see you and how you see yourself. And the sneaky part is it rarely looks like doubt. It looks like stepping back, staying quiet, giving someone else the floor and calling it professional. That quiet step b...

Send us Fan Mail Your calendar is full. You're keeping up, moving fast, and honestly proud of what you're getting done. Then you find out there's a major cross-functional initiative in the works and your name wasn't on the list. It's not a confidence problem. It's not a performance problem. But something is quietly happening to the way you're thinking, and it&apo...

Send us Fan Mail You picked the day. You thought through exactly what you were going to say. And then your boss pushed the meeting and you felt, if you're honest, a little relieved. So you reset the date. And then something else came up. And then again. And before you know it, you've talked yourself out of it so many times that the ask never happens. That's not strategy. It's d...

Send us Fan Mail Think about the last time you had something to say in a meeting and didn't say it. Maybe you were waiting for the right moment. Maybe someone else was talking and you thought you'd jump in after. And then the conversation shifted, and the moment passed, and someone else said something close enough to your idea that everyone moved on without you. That's not just a mi...

Send us Fan Mail Every time you speak, you're shaping how people receive what you say. And most of the time, you're doing it without realizing it. It sounds like this: I'm not as technical as everyone here, but... or this may not be helpful, but... It feels polite. It feels humble. But what it's actually doing is telling people exactly how much weight to give your ideas before...

Send us Fan Mail How often do you say “I’m good” and move on? It sounds harmless, but it’s one of the fastest ways to disappear in your career. I see talented leaders doing this all the time: you’re doing the work, and you’re driving results, but in the moments that actually shape perception, you’re saying nothing. This isn’t about bragging. It’s about being intentional with how you frame your val...

Send us Fan Mail You can be a confident leader and still feel thrown off by feedback. Especially when it points in completely different directions. One person tells you to speak up more. Another says you’re too strong. Suddenly, you’re left wondering which version of you is actually right. Tune in as I talk about how to think about feedback when it feels confusing or even contradictory. I share ho...

Send us Fan Mail You walk into a meeting prepared and you think you’ve anticipated the questions + direction of the conversation. Then suddenly the decision goes a different way, and you feel the shift immediately. Your body reacts before your brain catches up. That reaction isn’t just frustration. When reality doesn’t match what your brain expected, it triggers a response that can make even exper...

Send us Fan Mail You’ve recognized the moment. You’ve aligned. You’ve inserted value. You’ve supported others. Now it’s time to elevate. In this final part of the R.A.I.S.E. framework, I’m challenging you to stop leaving your growth up to interpretation. Silence inhibits opportunity. If you don’t anchor your value and raise your hand, someone else will. Elevate is about understanding your differen...

Send us Fan Mail Influence isn’t just built when you speak. It’s built when you choose who and what you reinforce. In this part of the RAISE framework, I’m talking about SUPPORT and why lifting someone else in the moment is one of the most strategic moves you can make. This isn’t about being agreeable. It’s about being intentional with your voice. When you consistently support the right ideas and...

Send us Fan Mail You know that moment when you stay quiet even though you had something to add? It feels safe in the moment, but it costs you more than you think. Staying silent doesn’t just slow your momentum. It keeps the room from seeing your value. This episode is all about what it really means to insert. To speak, contribute, and take up space in the right moments. Not because you want credit...

Send us Fan Mail Being right doesn’t make you influential. If you've ever walked away from a conversation wondering why your idea didn’t land, or worse, why someone went silent, you’re not alone. Today we’re talking about the A in RAISE: Align. This step is all about learning to shift your perspective before you speak so your message actually connects. This episode gets personal. I’ll share o...

Send us Fan Mail People can't choose you if you're invisible. And when you're silent, people think you're satisfied. This is the first episode in my five-part RAISE framework series, and we’re starting with something most people completely overlook: the moment the stakes quietly shift. You can’t advocate for yourself if you don’t even recognize it’s time. I’ll share the exact m...

Send us Fan Mail If you’re waiting for someone to hand you the next opportunity, this one’s for you. We don’t always realize how often we hold ourselves back, telling ourselves it’s not our role, we’re not ready, or we don’t want to look pushy. The problem? Silence gets mistaken for satisfaction. This episode is a wake-up call to notice the invisible rules you’ve absorbed and start challenging the...

Send us Fan Mail Most of us hear no and take it personally. We shut down. We see it as the end of the road instead of the beginning of a conversation. But what if no could actually be a place to start? In this episode, I’m sharing how to shift the way you hear and respond to no so you can stop backing down and start getting curious. This shift will change how you negotiate, how you lead, and how y...

Send us Fan Mail You are not meant to do this alone. If you’ve been trying to grow your career by working harder, waiting your turn, or following the standard process, this is the episode you didn’t know you needed. I’m sharing why the right people in your corner change everything, and how most of us wait too long or choose the wrong ones. It’s time to stop being passive and start building a caree...