How to Be a Hot Guy

Let me tell you how I met Kyle. I was tabling at SF zine fest, which is a huge event with maybe more than 200 vendors and surely close to 1000 patrons shuffling in and out of a conference hall in one of the more crowded neighborhoods of San Francisco. On my table, somewhat hidden by my zines on display, I put a small flyer with a call for participants for this podcast. Lots of people looked at it,...

I have to confess that Jude is my friend, so it’s impossible for me to have an unbiased opinion about him. But even before we were friends, I could tell that Jude was super smart, thoughtful, and caring. As I’ve gotten to know him, I’ve been so touched by his generosity and vulnerability, and so it gives me great pleasure to share some of that with you.  As Jude explains in our conversation, beaut...

Listener, can I be honest with you? I was nervous to meet Gene. Gene is 50, a lawyer, very smart and accomplished. The kind of person I am easily intimidated by and want to impress. But once Gene and I got talking, I was put at ease by his soothing voice and struck by how sensitive and earnest he was. He told me about his fluctuating confidence, how he wanted to be in a relationship, and how he’s...

The most important thing you need to know about Francisco is that he is a professor and academic. That means he has a particular approach to looking at, experiencing, and thinking about life. It seems like, since he was little, Francisco has always been observant and curious. As you’ll hear him tell stories about his family, relationships, career, and even his style, you’ll notice how he is examin...

I was excited to talk with Alfredo for a lot of reasons. He’s Mexican like me, from a neighborhood that’s similar to mine, and most importantly, he seemed like someone who could add nuance to our perception of the Latinx experience. The emotional lives of Latinos are rarely ever represented as having depth and dimension, and so we’re rarely represented as whole, complex people. My conversation wit...

"Look in the Mirror" with Aiden Aiden fits what you might already imagine a hot guy to be. He’s handsome and well-dressed. He’s charismatic. He’s funny and confident. But Aiden hasn’t always felt this way. In our conversation, we talked about growing up in LA, navigating challenging family dynamics, and what ultimately led him to make a change and live his life authentically as a queer m...

Welcome to How to Be a Hot Guy! New episodes drop every Monday :) See you next week, Hottie <3