Here's A Guy

We noticed our demographics have been skewing older and older. That's probably because the hosts themselves are getting older and older? Two of them were in their 20s when this show started, now they're all geezers. In any event, the youths are a key demographic. They're brains aren't fully developed so they're easy to exploit for profit. The problem is that we don't unders...

Welcome to Here's a Guy, the last podcast remaining that isn't just a couple of dingbats yammering about nothing in a suspiciously nice studio setup. Seriously, podcasting as a medium is in the toilet. It's all pivoted to video, and the setups all look the exact same. The content is largely mindless, or sometimes downright dangerous, and not even in a funny or interesting way. I don&#3...

Hmm, I’m having trouble thinking of something to talk about here. What do people do in these situations? Maybe a canned icebreaker topic, those are classic. Here’s one: What’s everyone’s favorite late night snack? This is especially relevant, since to have the energy to meet the grueling task of writing these descriptions, I am typically munching on a little something. It used to be Cheez-its, but...

Ah, now here comes the part of the week where I decide whether or not the episode description will have anything to do with the actual subject matter of the episode. Sometimes it does, often it doesn't. Or, sometimes it's tangentially related but not entirely. Sometimes, it will even start off related then veer off into some other entirely different direction. Like a little mini adventure...

Have you heard about this AI thing? It stands for “artificial intelligence.” Hey, my ex told me all my intelligence is artificial! For real though, AI is all the rage. Everywhere you look, everything is all AI this, AI that, AI, AI, AI. All I gotta say is, A, I could really use a cold beer! Well, that’s pretty much all I got. I was attempting a bit called “hack comedian attempts to riff on AI duri...

Ah, well, what do we talk about here. Griping about the weather is a good vamping topic, but we did that in the episode a bunch. We really try not to let the non-sequitur ramblings of the episode description overlap with the actual content of the show. We like to leave some things to surprise. For example, we also spend a bunch of time in this episode complaining about movies we don’t like. Unhear...

Here’s a Guy is back in action, and it’s time to ROCK! I’ll be honest, I don’t actually know what that means. It may be one of those things that’s been lost to the sands of time. Maybe it made sense to ROCK in the 70s and 80s, but now that rock and roll music is not nearly the institution it was back then, the implied behavior is a lot less clear. It used to be sort of a catch-all to describe gene...

A little something different this week. With Alex (and his cat) both on the mend, Cody and Jack decided to bring you all a special treat that they've been warning- er, I mean, talking- about for a very long time. Live on Jack's twitch, they definitely ranked each of the unique cultural phenomena known as the "Punk Goes" series of albums. The Punk Goes series was sometimes good, s...

Uh, well, we're not sure what to do here. We walked down the corridors to the Here's a Guy dungeons where we imprison the horrid creature we ask to write the episode descriptions. This time, though, we couldn't get him to wake up and ramble off some nonsensical paragraph for us. We poked him with our sharpest stick and he's just lying there. It looks like there's some spittle p...

Ah, it’s Wednesday. A.k.a., the day after Tuesday. And some may say, it’s the day before Thursday. People call it the “hump day.” Why? That’s because Wednesday was invented by ancient mathematician Ahmed Kamel, who also invented the camel. Camels famously have humps. The characters of Joe Camel and the talking camel in that Geico commercial were directly inspired by Kamel, who has become associate...

Well, it’s our first episode back after our recent live episode. Hopefully we’re not too rusty. There does seem to be a bit of a “performance hangover” the next time you try to entertain after a big production. In this instance, I’m not really sure why, seeing as we had a two-week break and we only work kind of hard on the show to begin with. I’m tempted to blame it on aging, but maybe that’s just...

Much to everyone's surprise/chagrin, we have lasted another 50 episodes. We celebrated this achievement, as is customary, with another edition of Here's a Guy Live over on Jack's twitch stream. If you didn't make it at the time, ask yourself, what the FUCK is wrong with you? Do you think you're better than us or something? Just kidding. We know some people are busy or don't...

It’s May! Will this be a good month for us? Well, it may! It may get a lot warmer! We may get some cool storms! Our younger relatives may graduate! Hell, it may be with honors! Our moms may have a lovely Mother’s Day! We may grill out and drink beers on Memorial Day! The NBA and NHL playoffs may be in the thick of it! We may plant out gardens! Pools may open! It may be the best month of the entire...

Howdy, partners! I don't understand where that saying came from- did cowboys view their peers all as equals or something? That doesn't seem like their thing. Goddammit, no, I have to get through this bit I was trying to do. Ok, here goes. Howdy, partners! This episode of Here's a Guy is a real hootenanny! So, rustle up your friends, grab your spurs, and- hold on, I gotta go back to this "howdy par...

Ah, baseball. An iconic sport full of iconic sights and sounds. The shine of the hardwood. The squeaking of sneakers. The gentle swish as a point guard drains a three. The smell of popcorn and hot dogs permeating through the stands (I think most sports actually serve the same general foods at the stadiums, so this one doesn’t really work). The athletes play 40-48 hard minutes, leaving their blood,...

You know a nice thing about having a lowbie podcast? The stakes are so low. You can try out all sorts of different bits, some of which may be extremely time-consuming, and there is little risk of putting a dent in your audience. Hell, you don't really even know whether people enjoy the bit or not. Why do I bring this up now? Oh, who knows. Apropos of nothing, with just Alex and JackJohn this week,...

I’m feeling a little bit tired this week, and the creative juices aren’t really flowing. Instead of writing a long rambling episode description, I’m going to list off a bunch of funny names for species of birds instead: Tufted titmouse Blue-footed booby Dickcissel Woodcock Little bustard Horned screamer Common shag Bushtit Hoary puffleg Bubo bubo Jackass penguin There, I think that killed enough t...

Alright, recording ran a little late this week. As such, and also due to the fact that we’re geezers now, we’re a tad sleepy. Too sleepy to come up with a real meandering stream-of-consciousness episode description. Instead, we’ll be trying some methods of getting to sleep. You see, that’s one of the torturous aspects of being old, you feel tired all the time but still have trouble actually sleepi...

It’s late February, and love is in the air. It’s unusual that the supposed time of romance happens in February, the time of year where it’s the most dreary and miserable outside, not to mention, it’s just a stone’s throw away from the onset of spring, which is also treated as being a time of renewal, which the polite way of saying, it’s a-time for fuckin’. Now, that part is just a matter of verteb...

Look. You can’t always be proud of what you create. That’s a whole part of this “creator space” that irks me. Well, other than the concept of a “creator space” to begin with. Or really, the overuse of the term “space” in modern parlance altogether. I’m not sure where that came from, if it’s a therapy-speak thing or what- but I suspect it’s something like that where complaining about it makes me an...

Despite all my rage, I am still just a Guy in a cage. One of our most tenuous ones yet. Also kinda stripping everything of interest out of the original line, which involves rats. A “rat in a cage” invokes a certain image of helplessness that a “guy in a cage” doesn’t really. Although, maybe it should. Mass incarceration is a significant issue, and drives a lot of other societal ills, with little p...

Folks, this episode, we’re a little bummed. Bummed about life, bummed about the world, bummed about it being winter, just bummed. I think some guys prefer being boobed! I don’t know if that really tracks. And honestly, it’s pretty inappropriate even if it does. Just a piss-poor effort all around. Where does the terminology of “bummed” come from? Does it derive from the derogatory term of “bum” for...

This episode is something a little bit closer to normal, unlike last week where we talked about a bunch of rednecks for like an hour straight. No, this week, it’s just the three usual rednecks hosting the show! Actually, it’s not really accurate to call them rednecks. That’s more of a set of cultural affectations that the hosts don’t display any of. It would be more accurate to describe them as hi...

I’m getting to the age where I don’t understand new-fangled language. I keep hearing people talking about a “vibe.” I also hear people talking about an “aura.” They seem like very similar concepts. I don’t know if there is supposed to be a difference though. Is it that an aura kinda radiates, but that a vibe is something you just inherently pick up on? Hell, that actually makes a lot of sense. May...

Eh, you know what, I'm pretty tired. Not sure if I have it in me to write a description. It's coming off the long holiday break, everyone is sluggish whaddaya gonna do. Plus, I just ate a tin of that beef jerky chew. I really don't know who that product is for. It's tasty, obviously, I mean it's made of beef jerky. But it's a subpar way to consume jerky, it doesn't seem to have the utility to help...