Hello Dysfunction

Hello Dysfunction

Comedy EN ↓ 375 episodes

A raw and hilarious dive into current events, familial chaos, awkward sexual experiences, navigating mental illness, gossip, and the political dumpster fire we’re all forced to live in. 

Be sure to visit the podcast's website and support the creator: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com

Author

Hello Dysfunction

Category

Comedy

Podcast website

hellodysfunctionpodcast.com

Latest episode

Oct 15, 2026

Where to listen?

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Get it on Google Play Install for free Android almost 10M downloads · 4.8 rating iOS soon

Episodes

S1 Ep297: I Know Better Than You 17.04.2025

Crystal has lips, Pata Fria had a lonely weekend, Tahoe was turnt and merch is on the way. Surgery is coming up, Pata Fria wants an old school, catch our live streams on Patreon and Elephants are really amazing. For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Instag...

S1 Ep296: Use It Or Lose It 10.04.2025

The cats are in big trouble, Pata Fria is being humbled, Crystal made a medical device and all our kids are unique. Ghosts are acting up, our government is starting a lot of problems, men shouldn’t be gynecologists and don’t date violent people. For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on...

S1 Ep295: Never Knew A F*ck 04.04.2025

We’re redecorating the set, Crystal finally dissolved her lips, medication adjustments are still happening and influenza is around again. Crystal had a kind exchange, Pata Fria is planning a vacation, the raccoons are getting too comfortable and Jimbo will always do the most.  For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com...

S1 Ep294: Vaginal Water Gun 27.03.2025

Abrupt weather changes are frustrating, Target is feeling the boycott, Aunt Flo is mean and we want Crystal back to herself. Sweet Potatoes are helping, new merch is available, some people can shoot water and don’t leave subs unattended!! For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Ins...

S1 Ep293: Where's My Provider Lesbian? 20.03.2025

Itsnotreal is a terrorist state, Home Depot was not welcoming to Pat, don’t trust raggedy dentist offices and Crystal had a really close call. Going to sleep is embarrassing, sometimes you have to parent the parents, Crystal is in the Mandela effect and do not play about your credit.  For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://you...

S1 Ep292: Agent of Chaos 15.03.2025

Crystal is sick, it’s raining again, make sure you subscribe on your web browser and Pat embarrassed herself once again. Don’t sniff salts, we love green flags, daylight savings is causing harm and don’t snitch on your co-workers. For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Instagram.c...

S1 Ep291: Shut Up & Square Dance 27.02.2025

We were rollie pollies, everyone should have exotic animals at work, Pat is a pool shark and may have got dosed. It’s time to find Uncle Crissss, women gotta do better, square dancing has an ugly history and Luigi might be coming home. For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Instag...

S1 Ep290: I Have To Use My Mouth 20.02.2025

Don’t drink a whole pot of coffee, Pat needs her glasses, all-star is finally over and watch out for red flags. Crystal was back at the hospital, tv used to be brutal, sometimes karma is on time and onions are good suckers. For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Instagram.com/hell...

S1 Ep289: Ladies of the Night 13.02.2025

Crystal is adjusting to a new medication, be your own valentine, Pat is working toward her independent goals and Stevi had a hospital visit. Trump is so petty, Kendrick did a great job, hoes get your heels ready and emergency responders are hot. For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on...

S1 Ep288: Amen To Jesus 06.02.2025

It’s been storming out, Mondays are for doctors appts, Pat is starting new meds and we learned a gross fact about our eyes. It’s Black History Month, practice good waxing etiquette, Peez is a supermodel and we’re just not very lady-like.  For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Ins...

S1 Ep287: Indian Sex Chat 30.01.2025

It’s Groundhog Day, dementia is not for the weak, Peez is punching people and Bunny went on a date. Mark needs to grow his hair out, jail dating can be lucrative, cure for hot flashes and Pat does not offer massage. For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunc...

S1 Ep286: Rest In Piss 23.01.2025

We’re back! Happy Birthday Stinkers, Peez loves Sugawolf, Nyah finally got a good doctor and you might still be carrying your baby daddy’s DNA. We live in North Korea, Pat helps a neighbor sneak out, classical is medicine and don’t steal from dead people. For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Fol...

S1 Ep285: Do You Have Lover? 06.01.2025

Crystal had some major dental work, RIP Cat Woman, we need a shed and car stuff can be overwhelming. Carolyn won’t listen and Jimbo might be her roommate, Pat’s phone is full of mysteries, Crystal discovered a disgusting way to get high and we love a thrifting score. For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodys...

S1 Ep284: Is He A Capricorn? 28.12.2024

Co-sleeping is amazing, a few cigs are good as a treat, the 90s had the best shoes and stockings are Crystal’s jam. Peez loves Jesus, women are magic, don’t be a mood killer and corporations are GREEDY. For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagra...

S1 Ep283: Disgusting Gender 22.12.2024

Cults are fascinating, Carolyn’s chemical warfare, billionaires are scum and we’ve made some mistakes. Older kids are a different kind of stress, sometimes you just gotta explode, pigs contain human and nature provides everything we need.  For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: In...

S1 Ep282: Mark's Favorite Episode 15.12.2024

Crystal had food poisoning and deleted our texts, Pat loves Home Depot and has been locked in with the DIYs. Playing 432hz at night might relax you OR terrorize your dreams, having kids later in life comes with a price.  For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellody...

S1 Ep281: Poor People Ornaments 07.12.2024

1970 was 30yrs ago, Pat started a new tattoo, Crystal is researching classified CIA docs and CEOs should be worried. Humans aren’t meant to be this busy, we miss a well loved bear, inspect your butthole and old people do not want technology.  For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG:...

S1 Ep280: Sponge On a Stick 01.12.2024

It’s nice seeing family, salt might be causing migraines, Crystal was on a hunt for “Crisssssss” and we’re getting back in the gym. Experiences are better than toys for Xmas, Peez is thankful she’s beautiful, Grenandine is a lie and we want a rage room.  For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Foll...

S1 Ep279: Gay Christmas Love 24.11.2024

Pat is your lesbian aunt that loves bowling, cigarettes are making a comeback, angry kids are not fun and angry cops are even worse. Everyone’s getting migraines, monitor your kid’s downloads, Facebook groups are a good time and basketball players are weirdly close.  For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodys...

S1 Ep278: Sweet Ass Ride 17.11.2024

The universe gave us a Christmas blessing, American dental work pricing is shameful, increase your fiber and stay away from the Bad News Bears. Peez is subscribing to things, Pata Fria has a type, aliens are here and get your HD merch while you can!  For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow u...

S1 Ep277: Hell Yeah Brother 09.11.2024

The energy is off in the world, you can’t be an outlaw AND a bootlicker, follow criminal etiquette and you have to eat food. Merch orders are now open, pedis are great without the horny parts, roid rage is not fun and good men still exist, somewhere.. For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow...

S1 Ep276: I'd Rather Be Pregnant 30.10.2024

Doctors can be frustrating, Carolyn’s friends aren’t robots, don’t ignore your ailments and hang with us on discord! Don’t be mean to us, teen years are for making mistakes, Crystal’s cat wants in on the convo and merch is on the way! For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Instagr...

S1 Ep275: I'm Calling America's Most Wanted 25.10.2024

Unexpected expenses are so rude, exes need to stay away, men still don’t know how to act and RIP MIMI.  Customer service has gone down the toilet, we don’t want new technology, older kids are the pricey ones and we love a good dessert.  For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Insta...

S1 Ep274: Boner Killer 17.10.2024

So many birthdays, there’s guns at school, colonization never stopped and Crystal went thrifting with our patrons. Santana takes all the shine, back to back disgust, a little anal play might be fun and the exes always come back.  For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Instagram.co...

S1 Ep273: The Boozy Brothers 09.10.2024

Happy Anniversary HD!!! Don't tell people what you think of their body, praying for Hurricane Milton, and we love a good Freudian slip. Teenagers are not always fun, hold your ankles, Pata Fria has a feminist leg and Oktoberfest is cute. For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon! Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe on YouTube! https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction Follow us on IG: Inst...

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