Hello Dysfunction

Crystal’s favorite store is gone, Billy is at it again, don’t see clients in Discovery Bay and monitor your kid’s porn searches. Happy Birthday Mark and Pata Fria’s dreams are still outta control.  This week’s tv recommendations are:  Koncrete podcast’s YouTube episode featuring Mark Laita of Soft White Underbelly.  The number for covid testing and vaccine appts in your area:  1-888-634-1123 Join...

April Fools, Easter and making sure everyone showers. Crystal is still betraying Pata Fria in her dreams and both are fully vaccinated. Don’t rush your happiness, 30s are when the REAL fun starts and we’ve never regretted breaking up with anyone.  Check out this week’s sponsor!  • BetterHelp Right now BetterHelp is offering a discount to our listeners. For 10% off your first month head over to bet...

The hot weather is not appreciated, Crystal is BACK in FB jail, Sharon Osbourne is shit, Chet Hanks is embarrassing. The universe is hella funny sometimes, spirits are acting up, let us keep our body parts and now we know how Natalia really feels.  This week’s tv recommendations are:  • Q: Into The Storm (HBO) • Seaspiracy (Netflix)  • Beauties of The Night (Netflix)  • Tina (HBO)  • The Shining (...

Crystal nearly dislocated her shoulder, Pata Fria’s dysfunctional trip to the snow, Billy loves Elvis, onlygrans, watch your mouth on the phone and keep it cute on clubhouse.  This week’s podcast recommendations are: • Radical Musings with Rosanna Arquette! • Sword and Scale episodes 177, 178, and 180. Check out this week’s sponsors!  • Hella Infused  High quality handmade CBD infused products.  B...

Nostalgic cravings, an old dumb monarchy, there’s always gold in the comments. Sharon Osbourne is gross, we love positive examples of sex workers, virginity is a societal construct.  This week’s podcast recommendation is Radical Musings with Rosanna Arquette!  Check out this week’s sponsors!  • BetterHelp Right now BetterHelp is offering a discount to our listeners. For 10% off your first month he...

Crystal is emotional, Pata Fria is not Italian. Stretch your butthole. Post our dead pics. How to hire a hooker and mosquito-eaters are harmless.  This week’s tv recommendations are:  •Meghan Harry Oprah interview (PBS) • Bliss (Prime)  • Biggie doc (Netflix)  •Pretend It’s A City (Netflix)  Check out this week’s sponsor!  Hella Infused  Highly recommended handmade CBD infused products.  Black wom...

Crystal got her final vaccine, Pata Fria has gerd. Don't have power trips while driving and be very careful using uber and lyft. Cute puppies, perform a random act of kindness, stalkers are no fun and some unfortunate news stories.  This week’s tv recommendations are:  I Care A Lot (Netflix)  Buried by the Bernards (Netflix) Canine Intervention (Netflix)  Allen v. Farrow (HBO Max) The number for c...

We’re entering the world of video. Crystal’s cat has fallen in love. Acid reflux feels like death is near. There’s a teen missing from Richmond. Cleaning your eyelash extensions is a must. Is there really a such thing as “just friends”? And nevermind the expiration dates.  This weeks tv recommendations are: Soft White Underbelly: “Faith” episode (YouTube)  Judas and The Black Messiah (HBO) War Dog...

Disrespectful dreams. Carolyn gets a haircut. What do you want to be when you grow up? The truth from Doug. Wishing Tessica the best. Sex work really is empowering and witchcraft won the Super Bowl.  This week’s tv recommendations are: Jersey Shore  Season 3 of The Sinner  The number for covid testing in your area:  1-888-634-1123 Check out this week’s sponsor! • BetterHelp Right now BetterHelp is...

It’s been a really dysfunctional week.  The original is always better than a copy. There’s been a horrible local murder. Awkward parenting moments, the disgusting wealth gap and some great listener write ins.  This week’s book recommendation is:  How To Talk To Anyone, Anytime, Anywhere by Larry King  The number for covid testing in your area:  1-888-634-1123 Check out this week’s sponsor! • Bette...

It’s raining it’s pouring, Crystal got the vaccine and is in Facebook jail, AGAIN! Constipated babies, postpartum hair loss and Pata Fria might not be asexual after all. Eskimo sisters, don’t tattoo animals and stay out of ppl’s trash!  This week’s tv recommendation is:  Tell Me Who I Am (Netflix)  The number for covid testing in your area:  1-888-634-1123 Check out this week’s sponsor! • Syma’s P...

Crystal blows a nervous kiss, we reintroduce ourselves and Pata Fria’s mom hates green. Michigan is taking steps in the right direction, aggressive hippos are throwing off ecosystems and don’t get braces at anyone’s home.  This week’s tv recommendations are:  Night Stalker (Netflix) Unforgotten: 25yrs after Willowbrook (tubi) An American Crime (tubi) Hard Candy (tubi)  Book recommendations:  A Chi...

Crystal thought she had Covid. Coffee is just a blindfold. Take care of your credit and cheese is more addicting than crack. Vaping isn’t safer than cigs and please don’t call our phones or do emergency break-thrus.  This week’s tv recommendations are:  Dear Mr. Gacy (on Tubi)  Surviving Death (Netflix)  The number for covid testing in your area:  1-888-634-1123 Check out this week’s sponsor! • Sy...

Covid is acting a fool, protect your toes! Carolyn takes a fall, grieving is tough, are you being accountable for your own actions? Celebrities and their spouses being frauds, don’t stay with anyone that doesn’t clean themselves and some tardy Happy Birthdays! This week’s tv recommendations are: The Minimalists (Netflix) The Wittman’s (ID Chanel) Obsession: Dark Desires (Hulu)  Check out our spons...

2020 is trying to kill Pata Fria. Always practice fire safety. Having kids later in life might be the way to go and Pee Pee is very spiritual. Wipe your devices before gifting them. Don’t touch hot things. Tinder for corpses is unfortunately not a thing, but do you know a serial killer? Some listener questions and lots of laughs.  This week’s tv recommendations are:  Songbird Nekromantik  Diagnosi...

It’s been a rough week. The vaccine is here, register your sons for a draft?? Some breaking news in really old cases, and the best verzuz yet. Take care of your mental health, some funny work stories and cool things to watch.  This week’s tv recommendations are: Alabama Snake  Murder on Middle Beach  The BeeGees doc  On The Record  The Surgeon’s Cut  Room 1028 Check out our sponsor! BetterHelp Rig...

Don’t eat the McRib. Kids say the darndest things. Pata Fria chose comfort, LOCK UP YOUR GUNS, now isn’t the time to travel and beware of secret envy.  This week’s tv recommendation is The Occupant on Netflix.  Check out our sponsor! BetterHelp Right now BetterHelp is offering a discount to our listeners. For 10% off your first month head over to betterhelp.com and use discount code HELLO, that’s...

It’s been a CRAZY week. Irish cream is back, our families aren’t doing well, the covid vaccine is coming. Let’s read more books, weird new citizenship requirements, listener questions and cool things to watch while inside. This week’s tv recommendations are:  Hillbilly Elegy The Kindergarten Teacher  Kennedy Assassination doc Check out our sponsor! BetterHelp Right now BetterHelp is offering a dis...

Xmas is here, let the decorating begin!  Covid scares, crazy soup and a platform shoe. Astral projection, helping our communities and cold raviolis. This week’s tv recommendations are: The Art of Racing In The Rain Game of Thrones  and Antebellum  Check out our sponsor! BetterHelp Right now BetterHelp is offering a discount to our listeners. For 10% off your first month head over to betterhelp.com...

Rainy days, xmas decorations and cat capes. Independent women jumping batteries, covid is acting up again, don’t be materialistic.  Discrimination, mental health talk and tons of listener write ins!!  Enjoy Check out our sponsor! BetterHelp Right now BetterHelp is offering a discount to our listeners. For 10% off your first month head over to betterhelp.com and use discount code HELLO, that’s bett...

New car, new president, cold weather and the holidays are now upon us. A really uncomfortable revelation and tons of great listener write ins!  This weeks tv recommendations are: I Was A Child Bride ; The Untold Story (hulu) The Queen’s Gambit (netflix) Frank Sinatra doc (netflix) A Teacher (hulu)  Join our Patreon!! patreon.com/hellodysfunction   Follow us on IG: instagram.com/hellodysfunction  ...

It’s election day and we’re stressed. Halloween, nightmares and menopause. Mysterious medical records, men hitting women, dark humor and managing anger.  Check out our sponsor! BetterHelp Right now BetterHelp is offering a discount to our listeners. For 10% off your first month head over to betterhelp.com and use discount code HELLO, that’s betterhelp.com/HELLO Join our Patreon!! patreon.com/hello...

Menopause, haircuts and skywriting. Don’t bully your kids, watch out for pipe bombs and always check the walls. Interesting groups, childhood weirdness, we got it all.  PLEASE MAKE SURE YOU VOTE!!! This week’s tv recommendations are: Borat Subsequent Moviefilm and revisiting Nurse Jackie. Join our Patreon! patreon.com/hellodysfunction   Follow us on IG: instagram.com/hellodysfunction   Email us yo...

It’s our 100th episode!!  Please make sure you vote like your life depends on it, if you find money keep it, can we lean more towards home remedies?  Cleaning house and plant studies, keep an eye out for all things spooky.  Tv recommendations for this week are:  Endless, Beautiful Boy and Lovecraft Country.  Check out our sponsor! BetterHelp Right now BetterHelp is offering a discount to our liste...

Post office drama, phone overboard, trigger warnings are important and what is the electoral vote! Raccoon babies have arrived, catfish is staged, Saturday is World Mental Health Day.  This week’s tv recommendations are:  Waves I Met The Devil Join our Patreon!! patreon.com/hellodysfunction   Follow us on IG: instagram.com/hellodysfunction   Email us your questions/stories at: hellodysfunction@gma...