Heart Versus Head

Marriage is boring. That's the gist of a recent Reddit post we saw where a Heart partner was complaining about her Head partner and the loss of spark in the relationship. He was, she said, a great husband, dad, provider etc. But it was boring. Well... is that Redditor wrong? In this episode, Randy and Beverly try to make sense of all of it and offer some different perspectives to get you and...

No... this isn't about the Festivus episode of Seinfeld. This episode is about an article in The Atlantic that shared how some couples only hash out their disagreements at scheduled quarterly or even yearly meetings where they sit down for just the purpose of resolving conflicts. Could you as a couple put off arguing over why the trash didn't get taken out for a year? What would waiting...

Have you ever been in a wonderful new relationship and everybody around you minimizes it or warns you that the wonderful will surely end? What if that isn't necessarily true. In this episode, Randy and Beverly talk about how to keep the good going when it's going good. #HeartVersusHead #HoneymoonPhase #CouplesGoals Send us Fan Mail Heart Versus Head is a podcast about relationship styles...

Why do Hearts seem to always be going back... back to the bad relationship... back to the person from a few years ago... or just back into the messy breakup? And why do Heads always seem to be so angry on the way out? As you'll learn in this episode, it's how they are each protecting themselves. Are you a recycler? Do you cling to the hope that the love you've felt in the past was a...

In this episode, Randy and Beverly explain what's happening when couples experience stressful situations together. So often, the things that create stress in a relationship are outside of the control of anybody in the relationship. From politics and climate change to war and economic downturns, the outside world seems to have us in the crosshairs sometimes. What should both of you be watching...

Is one partner in your relationship handling all the mental work to run the house? Who remembers what groceries to buy? Who remember to take out the trash or when the kids have that thing? In this episode, Randy and Beverly talk about the ways that their relationship fell into bad habits and ways to get out again. If you're feeling overwhelmed, maybe it's time to discuss a redistribution...

Does your Head partner want to be celebrated for taking out the trash? Once? In their life? Are you an unappreciated, unnoticed Head partner who is doing everything you can and still finding that it isn't enough for your Heart parnter? In this episode, Randy and Beverly explain why Heads want a celebration and why Hearts push back at the imbalance of it all.  #HeartVersusHead #ParadePlease #H...

Have you ever felt like giving up on your relationship without actually leaving the relationship? Do you have those days where you think, "why try if my partner won't try?" In this episode, Randy and Beverly talk about the trend of "quiet quitting" in marriage. Oprah Winfrey brought it up in her podcast recently and her guests focused on the growing number of (mostly) wome...

Retirement? Promotion? Laid off? New baby? Change is hard, especially on couples. In this episode, Randy and Beverly help you understand the transitions that you're going through. You'll learn how the Head partner is doing math and the Heart partner is writing poetry - no wonder it's so hard to get along. Each partner does it differently and understanding that can make the changes y...

In this episode, we explore blame. Why do we find it so easy to blame our partner for the things that happen in our lives? Go ahead and laugh as Randy and Beverly talk about whether it's okay to blame your partner for something they did in a dream and which one of them is to blame that time the house almost burnt down. It's an episode to get you and your partner talking about blame and s...

In this episode, Randy and Beverly examine why both partners get stuck in "not listening" mode. Communication is different between Hearts and Heads. The Head partner is often communicating to "fix" a problem while the Heart partner will communicate to create or repair connection. Because we communicate differently, we're actually tuned into different parts of the conversat...

Are you getting some of your emotional needs met outside of your relationship? In this episode, Randy and Beverly explain how lots of trouble can show up if we're getting those emotional needs met constantly by someone other than our partner. #MeetingNeeds #HeartVersusHead #RelationshipGoals #CouplesGoals Send us Fan Mail Heart Versus Head is a podcast about relationship styles and how those...

Does the Head partner in your relationship seem to SUFFER a lot? Or at least make everybody aware of how much they are putting up with? In this episode, Randy and Beverly explore why Heads seem to like to suffer. It turns out there's a reason and there's something simple that you can do conversationally to help resolve it.  #Suffering #CouplesGoals #RelationshipGoals #Hard2BHeadPartner ...

Why are Head partners so competitive? Have you ever had a game night fight or argued over why you had to spend so much to buy a better car than the siblings have? If you're competitive or your partner is overly-competitive, you'll learn from this episode. Randy and Beverly explain why they can't bowl together and how competition can grow from weekend sports into much bigger issues i...

Most people want a partner that supports them and cheers for them all the time. But - as you'll learn this episode - that's not always a good idea. Maybe you actually want a partner that's supportive and cheering most of the time. Randy and Beverly explain the difference between an "always partner" and an almost -always kind of partner." Plus they'll share how to...

Are you both Hearts? Are you both Heads? Do you think it would be easier if you were with someone more like you? In this episode, Randy and Beverly talk about the importance of balance when it comes to relationship dynamics. In all disagreements, someone is going to be in Heart mode and someone is going to be in Head mode. If you're both doing it the same, you will end up going in circles (an...

If you've ever had one of those arguments that the Head partner couldn't move past... this episode explains part of the issue. When issues are discussed, Hearts will focus on the way everyone is feeling about the issue. They want to make it feel better so they can move past it. Heads are trying to identify the logical errors and so they don't get resolution from simply an apology. T...

Happy 4th of July... In this episode, Randy and Beverly explore ways that couples can bring the fireworks back into their relationship. Whether you've been together a long time and gotten a bit predictable - or you're in a new relationship and trying to add some zing - we've got a couple of simple things that can really make a big difference. #HeartVersusHead #relationshipFireworks...

Randy crashed out. He was angry and ready to give up and walk away from even doing this week's podcast. When Heads get maxed out, they can shut down and explode. Hearts get maxed out too - especially when the Head is being angry. In this episode, Randy and Beverly take you inside their moment of being maxed out. Jump in and see how these problems arise and how to defuse them. If you feel like...

In this episode, Randy and Beverly are sharing some quick and simple ways that you and your partner can recover some of that missing connection. Life is tough sometimes and all couples will experience disconnected moments. As connection fades, conflict rises. These are the suggestions that can turn the problem around so you both can get back to being awesome... together.  There are suggestions for...

If you've ever had a disagreement that ended up in the Head partner storming off in a huff before the Heart partner even gets to the "important" part of what they were trying to say, then this episode is for you. This episode is for every Heart who has a lot of words and every Head who is overwhelmed by those words at times. Randy and Beverly help both partners understand how Hearts...

Have you been having the same argument for a decade? Are you both so stuck in your unmovable position that neither is willing to change? Have you become stale mates? Or at least reached a stalemate? In this episode, Randy and Beverly unpack what Heart and Head are each doing to fuel the problem. Then they offer some things that each partner should consider doing differently to get through the stal...

What are you building in your relationship with your limited human energy? We all have a set amount of energy available to get through the day, the week, the life. Are you using too much energy on the negative aspects of the relationship? How do you begin to turn that around. In this episode of Heart Versus Head, Randy and Beverly talk about their new book Heart Versus Head: How to Communicate and...

Sometimes you need to step back to get your partner to step toward you. In this episode, Randy and Beverly explore how the Heart partner often ends up in Head mode when they're too busy pursuing the Head. The trick... is to step back into being a Heart, which creates room for the Head partner to dance a little too. #lifesadance #HeartVersusHead  Send us Fan Mail Heart Versus Head is a podcast...

How does forgiveness work for Hearts and Heads? Why is so dang hard for Heads to say "I'm sorry." And why does it feel like Hearts say "I'm sorry" ALL THE TIME. In this episode of the Heart Versus Head podcast, Randy Hampton and Beverly Craddock dive into apologizing and how to get to real forgiveness. #heartVersusHead #ithinkitsaboutforgiveness  Send us Fan Mail Hear...