Hard Choices

In our unending quest to understand fuckability, the Hard Choices crew plucked out a list of notable characters from the Nintendo masterpiece Final Fantasy VI and got down to some fantasizing of our own. Claire Mulkerin, Dan Mulkerin, Alex Roberts, and MeganBob explore an entire floating continent's worth of boners in our search for the median of fuckability in the FFVI universe. We found an indis...

Some mediums are just too fuckable. Can you really walk past an orchestra pit, playbill in hand, and not feel a stirring in your loins? We didn't think so! That's why we gathered 21 notable characters from stage and screen musicals and sat down to rank their fuckability with a level of precision and rigor that would make a Sondheim song look like child's play.   Hub, Claire, Miles, and MeganBob jo...

Welcome to a very timey wimey episode where we take the entire long history of the Doctor Who franchise and do to it what Jack Harkness only wishes he could. We gathered up 21 characters from a wide spread of old and new Who and sat down in our best fezes and converse to rank the fuckability of all that time and space had to offer in our attempt to find the median of fuckability in the Doctor Who...

1999 called and it says "hey babe, remember me?" and yes, yes we do. We remember the exact moment when The Mummy first crashed into our lives and touched us in ways we couldn't yet fully articulate. Rick, Evey, Ardeth, all of them, swept us off our feet and we've stayed swept ever since. This universe has some of the crème de la crème of fuckable characters but it also has some real bad eggs in th...

It may be too late in February for Valentine's Day, but it's never too late for Villaintine's Day. That's right, we brought together four "Poor Unfortunate Souls" and asked them to rank the fuckability of 21 villains from the Disney animated canon. All we can say is "Be Prepared" because we will not stop until we get to the median of fuckability. And what happens when you ask Kris Newton, Kit, Mar...

Hold onto your sharply brimmed hats, it's MORTAL KOMBAT! Kam Servo, Miles Schneiderman, Dan Mulkerin, and MeganBob are one step ahead of Outworld in this episode, but the true destination for Hard Choices is always "The NetherRealm". Straight from the scantily klad arcade art of our youths, we rank 21 Mortal Kombat kharacters in an attempt to separate the kolor-swapped filler from the ones that ma...

In this episode, we prowl the back alleys of London to get to the bottom of one of Andrew Lloyd Webber's defining musicals: Cats.  We didn't leave Tom Hooper out of this though, because, for this episode, we're cats too. And you're a cat. We're all cats. No, no, don't look too closely at the CGI, just trust us, you're definitely a cat. Joining us to find the pick of the litter (and indulge in a su...

Straight from an edition of the Daily Planet that Lex Luthor definitely wouldn't want you to see comes the Hard Choices rankings of 21 of the most notable members of the Justice League of America. But we don't do rankings of how strong or heroic they are, this is a podcast that investigates their skills in the area of bedroom antics. Sure, these folks can save people from an alien invasion, but ca...

We've got a Patreon! It's aimed at keeping the show sustainable, covering hosting costs, and making weird new stuff possible! Patrons get some nice perks and help guide some of the show decisions! If you want in, go visit Patreon.com/hardchoices The show Patreon is not searchable because it's adult content, which is fair enough. So, if you want to support it and get early access to the Justice Lea...

This episode of Hard Choices has to be invited into your feed because this time Kris Newton, Kit, Claire Mulkerin, and MeganBob are ranking 21 of media's most interesting vampires. No amount of holy water or garlic will spare you from the intensity of these boners. Sure, many of these vampires might kill you rather than let you make the walk of shame back to your coffin, but that's a risk we're wi...

I'm Commander Shepard and this is my favorite episode on the Citadel. The Mass Effect universe is notoriously horny. This dating sim masquerading as a first person shooter offers all the juicy aliens you could ask for. The fuckability of these characters is undeniable, but we won't rest until we scientifically prove it. Who is the median of fuckability in this veritable buffet? We sit down and ran...

Winter is coming in this dragon-sized episode of Hard Choices, Miles Schneiderman and MeganBob are joined by special guests from The Unspoiled Podcast network, Natasha Winters and Krista Contino-Saumby. Together, they travel the roads of Westeros ranking the fuckability of 21 representative characters from the world of A Song of Ice and Fire and  Game of Thrones. How dangerous is getting into bed...

Boners assemble! It's time to rank the fuckability of the Marvel Cinematic Universe and the team of Claire, Kit, and Dan Mulkerin, along with MeganBob, are ready to romance one of the most expansive franchises in modern history. In their quest to find the median of fuckability, you'll learn more about robot sex than you ever thought you'd need to know, more about our hosts than ever before, and pe...

The second installment of Hard Choices is on the viewscreen and it's a doozy. Join Miles Schneiderman and Ensign MeganBob, along with special guests Sharon Schneiderman and Kris Newton, as they beam aboard the USS Horny to bone where no podcast has dared to bone before. The show sets a course to discover the median of fuckability in the 90s Star Trek universe and learns a lot about our crew member...

Welcome to Hard Choices, a podcast appearing approximately whenever the mood strikes and guaranteed to explore new vistas of horniness! In this episode, Miles Schneiderman, Kit MeganBob, and special guest Katrina Ehrnman-Newton rank the fuckability of 21 notable Lord of the Rings characters in an attempt to uncover who is the median most fuckable character in the LOTR universe. Turn down the torch...