Guantanamo Baes

Holy vibe shift, Batman! The cousins return to take inventory of the past year as they discuss everything from tariffs strike-downs and James Talarico to the Academy Awards and Lana Del Rey's embrace of the Southern Gothic aesthetic. Julian wonders about the wider implications of Punch the Monkey's popularity, while Brian assures the audience that, while he hasn't seen every episode of...

It's mostly a White Lotus season finale recap - we're pretty much disassociating from everything else rn!

The Baes teach Cuba how to establish an Oligarchy and revel in the schadenfreude of Emilia Perez's disappointing Oscar campaign.

Boy, what a year it's been, huh? (Lemon, it's February). The Baes dissect the YOLO actions of the New American Empire, Julian talks about taking work calls from an eliptical, and Brian talks about a family whose wealth is tenuously held together by a series Taco Bell franchises.

I know no one cares about the LA fires anymore, but here's a little distillation of what it was like when we were in the middle of it. Obviously lots to talk about in the year and we're still only 3 weeks into January. We're not going anywhere, hope y'all aren't either.

Hope everyone's having a "Wicked" good December! The Baes talk Yacht Rock, their favorite Cuban dishes for the holidays, and Julian shares his top movies of 2024.

Strap in.

It's the Menendez Brothers episode! The Baes dive into the re-opening of the infamous Beverly Hills murder case and Julian gets so mad at Brian at one point he literally storms out of the room. Boy, these Cubans have a real temper!

The Baes investigate the mysterious death of Hvaldimir, the Norweigan Beluga whale accused of subterfuge. Julian also laments the lack of weathered looking Hollywood leading men and Brian uses his grad school education to ask for help.

The Baes watched the Presidential debate so you don't have to! Or if you did watch it, that's cool too! Relive the highlights with us cause we got something to say about everything in this one.

Brian and Julian address the BRAT of it all, the Kamalaissance, and Cuba's (lack of) athletes in this year's Olympics. Also, Julian shares poo poo stories from the pool and the boys get into a kerfuffle over Olympic surfing.

The Baes discuss the sudden breakup of Tenacious D, the rise of gay fascism, and why the RNC is considered Grindr's Super Bowl.

It's a jet ski big fake boob summer here at the Guantanmo Baes! Julian is officially a certified lifeguard, Brian has a new comedy show premiering, and Cuba receives a visitor who they claim was trained by an American-based militia. What will the gang get into next??

Was Robin Williams a joke thief? Are we ready for a Brat Pack revival? Will any of this even matter if the nukes end up flying with Russian warships loitering just off the Florida coast?

Julian shoots guns in the country, security at Cannes get handsy with Kelly Rowland, and the Baes express their differing points of view when it comes to hanging out under bridges. The Pope throwing out gay slurs also emboldens Brian to try an Italian accent way too much in this one. Y'all, we watched the Garfield Movie after recording this and literally walked out of the theater. Please don&#...

How many Peabodys does one have to curl to get a good workout? Would you try to steal a manual transmission car if you couldn't drive stick? Should people have better vocabulary when it comes to describing fashion?

It’s an episode of advents! Brian and Julian get into a Khruangbin pissing contest, the Baes lament the rise of "Mid TV," and we fangirl over the upcoming Sydney Sweeney/Ana de Armas collab.

The Baes dish the chisme on the past schemes and recent sentencing of Cuban spy cosplaying as American diplomat, Manuel Rocha. Also, Brian reaches out to the last person to ever cast OJ Simpson in a film and the palace kitties of Mexico receive a well deserved social safety net.

Brian and Julian dissect the Goya of it all behind LA's consortium of Cuban bakery royalty; Sylvester Stallone forgets that people aren't ugly, they're just poor; and after long, internal debate we decided that the pig stays in the picture.

What's at the core of the layers being peeled away by Serial's latest exposé on Gitmo? Why are casino owners so excited every time Bruno Mars walks into the room? And are men allowed to have mental health issues?

Cuba’s got an AirBnB problem, we learn why the left hand is the Devil’s Hand, and RuPaul will sell you a copy of Hitler's Mein Kampf below market value if you’ll let him.

The world's a minefield and we stepped on pretty much every one of them in this episode. All I know is we're both so excited to see what the Latin-influenced pagoda is going to look like at Cuba's new embassy in South Korea.

Get in the car, betch, it's our Jesus year! Brian gets a religious education, Julian spills some J-Lo tea, and Cuba may (or may not) be facing a cybersecurity attack. And it's still only February?

Julian breaks down the parallels between the Cuban Revolution and the movie Saltburn. ***Fair Warning: This episode contains gratuitous spoilers to the film Saltburn***

Are we able to manifest our own conspiracy theories? Is this turbulent decade simply the dawning of the Age of Aquarius? And will there always be a market for Victorian period pieces?