Green Blooded Bastard's Movie Commentary Podcast

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Boy Next Door. This movie is a new, fresh hell that haunts you as you watch it, but that was not the point!

This is a crap little zine I threw together, based on some random art, poems, or collage artfuck chaos art I create while recording episodes or burning time.  green blooded bastard

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Guard Dog. This is a funny short film about how we see our dogs and what they may be thinking.

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Sons of Steel. This movie is a fucking wild fever dream of what the fuck barbecue!?!?! This is what happens when you send all your criminals to the edge of the Earth and let them make films!

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Hercules in New York. This movie is just kind of an average film, which is fine. It could be worse, and frankly, it should be worse! During this episode, I reveal that I was accepted into a master's program and scanned some pages from an issue of my zine. I also semi-crash out about something haha!

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches A Dog's Life. In this film, the tramp from outer space teams up with a dog from the wrong side of the tracks to kick some ass!

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Psychic (Short 2018).  It's a family affair in this short film.

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Rink. This movie is a thing that was made. Yeah and I watched it.

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Mortal Kombat (1995). This movie is a blast from the past with some magic punches and shit kung fu fighting shit in it!

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Men. This movie is a new, fresh hell that haunts Jessie Buckley in this joint!

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches How To Shoot A Ghost. In this film, Ghost girl and Ghost boy wander the streets living a lie. It's definately a thing.

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Together. This is a film about how we see ourselves and our partners and individuilism and losing yourself in someone and some tits!

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Death and Ramen. In this short film, Ramen is trying to kill himself and kinda fucks it up so he plays chess with Death and then goes to the club. I'm Bobby Mom!

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches What's a Nice Girl Like You Doing in a Place Like This?. In this short film, a dude goes crazy over a fucking photo and shit gets crazy for a while.

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Torque. In this film, the dude from The Grudge teams up with the dude from NWA to take on Adam Scott and Vince from Fast Five and Blade 2! The film closes out with some Nickleback and shit get's real at some point between several dolly zoom shots! Fucking kill me!

This is a crap little zine I threw together, based on some random art, poems, or collage artfuck chaos art I create while recording episodes or burning time.  green blooded bastard

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches BMX Bandits. Ninety minutes and there's barely a fucking BMX in it for around 70 minutes! What a fucking slog. Go watch Gleaming the Cube instead!

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Hot Frosty. In this film, a jacked snowman comes to life to help women cum. 

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Ernest Saves Christmas. In this film, Santa is trying to give up his powers to some chump so he can bone an old lady. There are some repulsive little shits and Ernest traffics some underage girl.

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Lego Star Wars Holiday Special. In this film, some Jedi goes missing in space and time and shit get's real, bro.

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Jane Austen's Period Drama. In this film, a chick get's her period as the exact wrong moment and hilarity ensues.

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches Weapons. In this film, some kids go missing and it's up to Cable, Silver Surfer, and Wong team up to find them. Shit hits the fan and gets real real quick.

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches ANIMA. In this film, a prick dude is living in a fantastical world where song & dance happen. 

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause. In this film, a prick tries to save Christmas again, but this time via vaginal creampie and knocks up Elizabeth Mitchell and somehow does. This is the 11th aniversary episdoe! #fuckice

The one where Green Blooded Bastard watches The Santa Clause 2. In this film, a prick tries to save Christmas by getting married and tit fucking Elizabeth Mitchell and somehow does.