GIRLBLOGGER: THE PODCAST

BREAKING: Jussie Smollett and Karamo Brown are a couple. There hasn't been this iconic of a liar duo since Milli Vanilli! I start off this episode with an update on our girl, Daveigh Chase (it's not good), and then I swiftly dive into deep shit-talking about the new gay it couple that is Jussie and Karamo. Do we think they will commit to each other as fiercely as Jussie committed to his false narr...

Helena Bonham Carter won't stop farting!!! Or at least that's what the internet is alleging. I start off this episode by getting into The White Lotus season 4 casting drama, and the bizarre details as to why Laura Dern has replaced Helena. After that, I discuss why male rhinoplasties can be a social misstep - as exemplified by that douchebag, Clavicular. Next up is Lizzo's new album that is perfor...

STORMAGANZA AHEAD!!! This week I talk about a lot of upsetting things, but my snarky attitude makes them palatable (I think?). Sadly, we have to pour one out for another child star gone too soon. Daveigh Chase, the beloved actress who scared the shit out of us in The Ring (2002) has passed away. I can't take all this heartbreak! Thankfully, to lighten things up, I discuss the new outrageous comedy...

I'm pretty sure I said the word "gay" at least 500 times this episode. Did you know it's pride month?! I kick off this week's episode with a surprising brand partnership between Tom Brady and new coconut water called "Good Nut". A lot of people think coco water already tastes like semen, so why not just call it like it is! After that, I detail my takeaways from the new horror movie, Backrooms (202...

WHY DIDN'T LAURIE BECOME A POP STAR?! This deep dive episode is dedicated to everyone's favorite sleazy saga, Euphoria. While me and my bestie, Connor (@connorxbowman), would have liked to unpack Euphoria in its entirety, we only had enough breaths in us to focus on season 3. What a season it was! We talk about everything from the internet's hot takes, to Cassie's 50 foot woman tits, to Laurie's p...

Lions, and tigers, and Azealia Banks wearing a crop top that says "lobotomy" in Hebrew - oh my! I kick this week's episode off by dissecting the recent viral video of Judi Jupiter abruptly interviewing Azealia Banks in NYC. Who knew that Azealia can play [kinda] nice sometimes! After that, I happily go on about Demna's latest Gucci show, but more specifically, how good Lindsay Lohan looked in atte...

LOOK OUT TAYLOR SWIFT! There are two new pop divas to reckon with! The first one being my long time favorite, Trisha Paytas. I start out this episode by discussing Trisha Paytas in detail along with her multitude of career endeavors. What can't she do?! Next up, I get into my other favorite celebrity of the moment, Meg Stalter, and gab about her new hit single "Prettiest Girl In America". The song...

Just a few updates this week! Charli XCX continues to give us s€xsi, unique, "rock" music, while other people continue to annoy the sh!t out of us. And by "other people" I'm directly referring to Blake Lively and James Charles. This week I kick off the episode by establishing my fondness for Charli's new song "Rock Music" while also clarifying that I'm no longer worried for her post-Brat era disco...

The sequel sucked and Lena is in pain! THAT'S ALL!!! This episode I go DEEP on two very significant topics: Anne Hathaway's latest drag coded film, The Devil Wears Prada 2 (2026) and Lena Dunham's seminal new memoir, Famesick. As you can see by the length of this episode, I have a lot to say. I talk about everything from why Miranda Priestly has lost her cool to how Stanley Tucci is too sexy to be...

Madonna is back! Well, actually she never went anywhere, but she's here to tell you she's creating a new persona. One that involves Sabrina Carpenter, evidently. Listen to me get into Coachella weekend 2 and the fabulous duet between these pop divas. I discuss everything from Madge's stolen corset, her new sequel album, and my hot take on her aversion to collaborating with women she feels threaten...

Hello hello hello! Have you ever willingly made a complete fool of yourself for the slim chance of television stardom? Well, if you have, then you have a lot in common with our modern messiah, Valerie Cherish! Oh yes, this week's episode is all about The Comeback and the show's legendary star. Join me and my bestie, Connor (@connorxbowman), as we discuss all of our favorite aspects of this incredi...

Bieber slayed at Coachella!!! Just kidding, it kinda sucked. But you know who didn't suck? ADDISON RAE. Listen to me go deep on all of the highlights from Coachella weekend one. After that, I can't contain my excitement for the recently announced Martha Stewart biopic starring Cate Blanchett in the titular role. Also, did you know Cate Blanchett hates leaf blowers? Next up, I have to address the i...

Long episode! What can I say, I just love to talk about drama. Specifically, The Drama (2026) is a film I have a lot to say about. Would you call off a wedding after learning your soon-to-be spouse almost committed an unforgivable act of terror? Well, this film teaches us is that maybe you should. After that mess, I get into the unexpected and polarizing career pivot for Kylie Jenner's hard seltze...

BIMBOFICATION! The new kink that's sweeping the internet thanks to republican husband, Bryon Noem! Yes, I am sure to break down this saucy, bizarre scandal in granular detail this episode. Honestly though, I hope Bryon owns his sexual oddities and starts an onlyfans to monetize! Become a full Barbie icon, my guy. After that, I switch topics completely and talk about my new favorite surface level (...

Ladies! If you are going to throw a metal bar stool at your man... be damn sure that he is not recording you! This week starts off with a bang as I dive into the entirety of scandal surrounding the very abrupt cancellation of the new season of The Bachelorette. Will Bachelor Nation survive after this?! After that mess, I get into the very anticipated new season of The Comeback. Valerie Cherish fee...

AHHHH!!! Heidi Klum flopped so hard that it felt like a hate crime! This episode is mostly about the biggest night in Hollywood: The Oscars. Who won, who lost, and who looked like a dirty dish rag. Spoiler alert! Heidi Klum had a devastating fashion faux pas that I go on about for almost 20 minutes. Beyond all the Oscar discourse, I also talk about other important topics, such as Nicole Kidman's o...

Timothée Chalamet says no one cares about ballet and opera!!! Apparently, such comments will get you an internet beating and the potential loss of an Oscar. Aside from those harsh comments, Daryl Hannah was upset by the harsh portrayal of herself on Ryan Murphy's Love Story and has taken to the New York Times to air her grievances. If someone called me a cokewh0re, and I had never done coke, I'd c...

Trying out something new out this episode - my CLONE will be hosting!!! JK, I do not have a clone, or at least not yet! Firstly, I of course have to address the latest internet conspiracy surrounding Jim Carrey. Can't a guy just get a chemical peel and some filler without being berated with clone accusations?! I mean, c'mon. After that, I take a long time explaining why Scream 7 (2026) is the wors...

Did anyone die this past week?! Thankfully, no. HOWEVER, Benny Blanco did fart and put his dirty feet on the couch. An abomination that viewers were recently subjected to. Aside from that travesty, viewers have also been tuning into Love Story - the 1000th Ryan Murphy show to drop in the past year. Love Story is very true to the chic, minimalist aesthetics of its two leads, although the real star...

WHOOPSIE DAISY YOO-HOO! That lyric hit me like a freight train. You know what else did? Both the new, groundbreaking adaptation of Wuthering Heights (2026) AND the new America's Next Top Model documentary on Netflix. This past week has been a significant one for any of the coquette girlies that might be on an SSRI. This episode, I of course do a deep dive on all of these new, significant pieces of...

BREAKING: Bad Bunny performed at the Super Bowl this year and did not speak English. Did you hear?! WILD. This episode I of course give my take on the [not so] scandalous scandal regarding this year’s Super Bowl halftime performance and all the hullabaloo that came with it. However, I first have to pay my respects to the great James Van Der Beek aka Dawson Leery who sadly passed away this week. To...

"I MUST EXPRESS MYSELF. IF YOU DON'T LET ME, I WILL GO INSANE AND I WILL TAKE YOU WITH ME!!!" This, of course, is a slightly modified line from Beetlejuice (1988) spoken by the late Catherine O'Hara. Yes, unfortunately we have lost another icon. Everyone pay your respects to this fabulous diva by watching one of her many great works in both film and television. She deserves it! In other, slightly...

THE WORLD IS IN PERIL! Well, at least we have a woman on TikTok to entertain us with her bizarre eating habits. Through the dark times we must always find a bit of light to guide us forward, and for me, that light is a blonde english teacher named Courtney Cook. She eats soup dumplings, she drenches everything in mayo, and she reassures us that we're "not stressin'". After I gab about Courtney, I...

I DO NOT WANT TO RECONCILE WITH MY FAMILY!!! That's what I texted my family group chat after they criticized my Ambrosia salad on Christmas. Similarly, the son of our queen Victoria Beckham has also severed ties with his family. The majority of this episode is all about the current drama between Brooklyn Beckham and his fam. There's so much to cover! Like how his wife Nicola tried to unalive her n...

Jennifer Lopez looks like sh!t and Julia Roberts spewed hate during her award presentation! Well, not exactly, but both of those statements are versions of takes I have on this year's Golden Globes. Listen to me share my thoughts on host Nikki Glaser, Ariana Grande's eyebrows, and Paul Thomas Anderson's tendency to flip-flop in catering between gays and straights. After all that noise, I move on t...