Getting Through This with Tom and Scott

Scott sets out on a days long quest to not be known as the guy who never got his PATH train senior fare application notorized. But his notary nightmare leads us to imagine a world without notaries, and the need to establish a Notary Republic, a country inhabited solely by notaries.

Tommy discovers the secret to happiness and that’s only one of the highlights of this episode! We create two movies, including The Tummler, set at a soon to close Catskills resort. And then there’s a story about an impossibly snobby family who finally embrace not eating drumsticks with a knife and fork.

Scott is inexplicably not invited to the opening of the UN General Assembly, but he does get to see the blocked off streets and heavy police presence on tony Park Avenue. When a phalanx of law enforcement prevents him from continuing his walk uptown on the avenue, Scott doesn’t say, referencing his status as The Great Pedestrian, “Do you know who I am?”

Our journey starts aboard an Amtrak liner on the fine Hudson River, and then takes us to Des Plaines Illinois, as we speculate about the origins of what appears to be a French name of a Chicago suburb. Plus, why animal acts need a good warmup guy to make sure the audience laughs and applauds loudly.

Scott loves his girlfriend and his seersucker sports jacket. Should there be a different word to describe affection for a garment than “love”? We create one, as well as the idea of having a PA announcer for the world. Also, we introduce our vision of a home office, where you and your family live.

A sports episode for even those who don’t like sports. And sports cliches. Tommy boldly switches his allegiance from the LA Rams to the Buffalo Bills, which inspires Scott to recall his relief when he didn’t get picked to be the place kicker on the Lincoln High School football team. But he did get to be the PA announcer, but the sound system could only be heard by people sitting five yards away.

Scott assumes a catcher’s position and reaches deep into a bottom shelf at Key Food, to find a sale priced four pack of tuna in water that two elderly ladies had been searching for. What happens next is the stuff of classic heartwarming Hallmark movies. And what if a baseball scout was in the aisle at that time, and offers Scott a contract to play catcher for a minor league team in Chattanooga?

Tom and Scott’s long weekend in the Catskills is filled with great friends, food, the lively art of conversation and ultimately “four ghosts dancing”on the porch of a Victorian inn. But that joy and frivolity is threatened, when Tom is locked out of his house and must summon all of his gymnastic skills to climb through a small window without causing injury or attracting the attention of local law...

Tom and Scott kickoff the long holiday weekend with an appreciation of summer breezes, that Seals and Crofts referred to in their 1972 hit song. And they decide not to try to bottle those breezes for potentially enormous profits. Tom and Scott will have breezes galore as they and their girlfriends enjoy a Weekend in the Catskills.

Tom and Scott flawlessly execute a miraculous maneuver, as they arrange to meet on the same subway car enroute to a Brooklyn Cyclones game. Surprisingly, no one on the train applauded after they successfully completed this high wire act. And when they share their small town wonderland experience at the ballpark, you’ll feel like you’re in a seat right next to them!

Tom dodges a bat flying waist high at a Walmart and speculates as to whether it was someone’s emotional support bat. Scott breathes a sigh of relief that he has never encountered a plane full of emotional support bats, although they are actually not blind at all! They have excellent vision, especially in low light, so calling someone “blind as a bat” can actually be a compliment.

Scott votes in a primary election held on the unlikeliest of days, August 23, to ensure he maintains his “super voter” status. Since he’s so diligent about voting, should his vote count three times as much? And should all voters receive rewards and points in their airline and hotel loyalty programs to encourage people to vote?

Scott rediscovers his past, as newly digitized audio cassettes include one of his first known comedy performances from 1978. Plus, in a follow up to our The Case for No Case episode, Scott gets a new, even bulkier and sturdier IPhone case, and after further review, he decides to continue not using any case at all!

Tom’s very moving moving story has Scott holding on to his seat, rather than the riskier sitting on the edge of his seat. But this thrill a second journey of a truckload of boxes, paintings and furniture from Tom’s former LA home, is so Hitchcockian that we can even figure out the scene where Hitch makes his brief cameo appearance.

We make the case for no case, as Scott revels in the elegance and sensual beauty of his unprotected IIPhone 11, as he awaits a free replacement for his Otter Box case. But we caution our listeners, that along with its sleek feel, glossy purple color and lighter and easier to fit in your pocket size, an uncased phone is like being a high wire act, where at any moment a dropped phone could lead to i...

The air conditioning in Tom’s car isn’t working, and he realizes it would be easier to solve global warming than find a Volvo service center that has the replacement part. Plus, Scott suggests a midi graduation gown to beat the heat. And we show our appreciation for the word “appreciate”, and how it gives everything more value.

As people are doing activities for the first time since March 2020, Scott just did something for the first time ever. He provides just a taste of the unbridled beauty of Vermont and New Hampshire, while Tom considers the merits of bridled beauty as well, as in a fine horse. And we wonder if Scott’s effusive praise of the Dartmouth campus will lead to his being named the commencement speaker at the...

A gift of large boxes of Ring Dings, Ding Dings, Devil Dogs and Cupcakes, which would have been a dream when Scott was a kid, turns into a nightmare as an adult. Will anyone accept his magnanimous offer to take some of the boxes off his hands, especially since sugar is the first ingredient in all of them?

We propose a yearly Throwback Thursday, where a random year is chosen in a lottery drawing, and the entire nation must wear the clothing of that period for the day. This will create many jobs and will be a boon to the domestic manufacturing of clothing from all different times in history.

Tom becomes the first volunteer doctor, and “urger” of urgent care, as he helps his girlfriend secure medical appointments that ultimately lead to a stirring happy ending. Plus, Scott conjures up a O’Henry like story, where a man sells his bragging rights to buy his girlfriend dinner, but is then left with nothing to say.

In a shorts story worthy of O’Henry, Tom and Scott reveal, for the first time, how they have managed to be lifelong friends and podcast partners, despite the fact that Tom doesn’t wear shorts, while Scott spends many hours researching his shorts purchases.

The two main elements of our philosophy are being relieved about things that don’t happen, and being very appreciative of what we do have. The Ice Hotel in Quebec, where you must wear animal skins while you sleep on a bed of ice, is a prime example of something we’re relieved we don’t have to experience. But we’re looking forward to going back in time to 1943, to make a new picture starring Kather...

What if we didn’t wait until we did something wrong to deny that we did anything wrong? This breakthrough declaration of innocence will fill you and your friends with relief. We also return to the Webb Telescope and create an antidote to feeling small and insignificant when you look at these new images of faraway galaxies. Simply take a microscope, look at a slide, and you will feel full sized aga...

The wondrous time travel images from the Webb Telescope inspire Scott and Tom to ponder if there is intelligent life in the outer galaxies, will they necessarily be smarter or look that much different than we do? Also beware of unscrupulous cosmetic surgeons claiming to possess the same infrared technology to make you look the way you did ten years ago.

In perhaps the best example of how we can breathe a sigh of relief from things that didn’t happen, Tom and Scott celebrate their total non involvement in causing Brexit, the recent Supreme Court decisions, and any major war, conflict or troubles.