George Schlatter's Comedy Collection

Emo talks about being attacked in a park, finding the family cat after mowing the lawn, praying and religion, jumping into leaves, mistaking Dan Quayle for Pat Sajak, the race to put a man on Mars, the national deficit, nuclear weapons, and the Soviet Union. Listen to more comedy from Spotted Dog Entertainment: https://linktr.ee/ClickHereForComedy

Margaret talks about being the only skinny one in her family, her younger sister who stuck her tongue on a frozen door, her alcoholic, gambling father's hair transplant, her mother's cooking, her younger brother's annoying habit, and going on dates. Listen to more comedy from Spotted Dog Entertainment: https://linktr.ee/ClickHereForComedy

Wayne talks about being good at water skiing, deciding to try snow skiing, different methods of skiing, going too fast, and taking others down with him. Listen to more comedy from Spotted Dog Entertainment: https://linktr.ee/ClickHereForComedy

Rosie talks about NY accents, The Donahue Show audience, her sister's bridal shower, being arrested by the fashion police, and ending up as a fashion don't. Listen to more comedy from Spotted Dog Entertainment: https://linktr.ee/ClickHereForComedy

Gilbert talks about the popularity of maple syrup in Canada, an encounter with aliens who were wondering about Ben Mazzera, having coffee with the pope and discussing Kurt Waldheim, and Kurt's explanation of his photo with Hitler. Listen to more comedy from Spotted Dog Entertainment: https://linktr.ee/ClickHereForComedy

Ellen talks about people who write "over" on letters, waiting for a phone call that never comes, loose change, strangers walking into occupied stalls, the purpose of the railings in public bathrooms, and people who miss the toilet bowl in women's restrooms. Listen to more comedy from Spotted Dog Entertainment: https://linktr.ee/ClickHereForComedy

Arsenio talks about a sign on the freeway for The Braille Institute, trying to singing along at a jazz concert, Michael Jackson wanting to buy the Elephant Man's bones, rolling joints, the unpopular McRib, people who wear sweaters around their necks, and dating pretty women vs. ugly women. Listen to more comedy from Spotted Dog Entertainment: https://linktr.ee/ClickHereForComedy

Jenny talks about her date who used coupons for dinner, a blind date who looked like a catfish, a guy who wanted to be mothered, taking care of her older husband, her strict mom, her Polish dad, and her parents being supportive of her comedy career. Listen to more comedy from Spotted Dog Entertainment: https://linktr.ee/ClickHereForComedy

Tom talks about beef jerky being gross, Grape Nuts being the hardest cereal, how cartoons influenced him, and his dad comparing baseball to ballet. Listen to more comedy from Spotted Dog Entertainment: https://linktr.ee/ClickHereForComedy

Judy plays a couple of snippets of songs on the accordion and changes the words, getting interrupted from a nap in her car, traveling down south and getting pulled over by a cop, and not wanting to go to her friend's wedding. Listen to more comedy from Spotted Dog Entertainment: https://linktr.ee/ClickHereForComedy

Dennis talks about being better as a married man, his wife's name calling, compromising and going shopping for the food that she cooks, the power of Fiber One cereal, having a baby boy who inherited his bulging eyes, the Lamaze Method, his son's first word, and not understanding how pain could be pleasurable.

Carol talks about getting divorced, not understanding why people get annulments, not having any kids, getting back into the dating game, comparing sex to choreographed dancing, having to learn a new dance when you start dating someone new, and the tough life of a gynecologist's wife.

Rita talks about her parents being overprotective, wanting kids, being uninformed growing up when it came to sexuality, the ultimatum she gave her boyfriend, how men live, and an alternative way to break up with a man.

Jonathan talks about playing pretend with his daughter, his daughter's daycare's mob ties, his forgetful grandfather, talking to his daughter about death, religion, and sex, being picked on and taking martial arts, a man who wrote a book about names, drug busts and criminals getting caught, what a construction worker would do in case of a missile strike, buying a VCR, and technology making everyth...

Paula talks about buying a trampoline and confusing the neighbors, having a big butt and thick thighs, having naked dreams, making a dream pit stop at the donut shop, Paula's siblings all having names that start with P, and her mother's idea of nice things being Flintstone glassware.

Norm talks about what it must feel like to lose a game show, The Dating Game's weird questions, his girlfriend dropping marriage hints, being lazy, cat food commercials, going to the pet store, how he imagines training a pitbull, getting a weiner dog, and his dog's sweater.

Brett talks about being raised in the South, marrying and divorcing a redneck, marrying a Jewish man whose parents aren't too pleased, the difference between NYC and L.A. when it comes to cars, women with plastic surgery, department store workers spraying perfume on you, annoying rich children, and Boston having just as much inbreeding as the South.

Chris talks about how it's hard to be prejudiced against black babies, always being suspicious because of his race, athletes being role models, and a 50s-themed cast party he went to.

Shelley is on the phone trying to reach someone, but the child on the other end isn't cooperating.

A man tries to give a speech about Shakespeare, but a drunk audience member keeps interrupting.

Carl interviews a 2000 year old man about the secret to staying alive for so long, the origin of the word cheese, and what cavemen did instead of applauding with their hands.

Dick talks about changes in humor and entertainment, tells a joke as it was 10 years ago and if it still stands up, talks about how Tarzan used to be a role model and about the changes in music. 

Bob acts out scenario as a driver instructor who's trying, unsuccessfully, to teach a woman how to drive.

Jack talks about being included on the Colgate Comedy Hour, not knowing the show was off the air because of his broken tv, and not trusting companies that have three names.

Jerry Seinfeld and Julia Louis-Dreyfus introduce George Carlin to open the show.