Gentle Power

Most weeks on Gentle Power, we talk about power dynamics in professional settings like job offers and negotiations. In this episode, we focus on negotiations in none other than… love and dating! We explore how vulnerability, power dynamics, and behavioral psychology shape connection and influence, often in ways people misunderstand. Our conversation covers: Vulnerability feels like weakness but it...

This week we sat down with our friend Victor Hsu, a New York - based real estate broker who works with global families, primarily Chinese, navigating the U.S. housing market. Victor’s perspective blends cultural nuance, decades of on-the-ground experience, and a front-row view into how real people behave when the stakes feel high. The overlap between real estate and hiring negotiations turned out...

There’s one insight in our client work that many people would find surprising: mid-career professionals often land stronger increases, both in percentage terms and in absolute dollars, than do senior executives. At first glance, it feels counterintuitive. Senior leaders negotiate business deals, oversee large teams and budgets, and carry higher titles that signal experience and competence. But job...

This week we spoke with our friend Matt LeBaron, cofounder and CEO of Pocketbook. Matt helps large companies evaluate their software vendors, renegotiate contracts, and make smarter decisions about their tech stack. He also works as a part-time consultant with Adobe’s software procurement team. Our conversation covers: How Matt creatively turned a full-time job posting from Adobe into part-time cl...

This week on Gentle Power, we’re joined by Shawna Samuel, an executive consultant who focuses on supporting executive-working mothers in demanding roles.  Shawna began her career in global finance, where she spent two decades shaping partnerships across the US and Europe. When she became a mother, the structure that had supported her career started to feel less stable. Her responsibilities grew wh...

This week on Gentle Power, we explore how Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy has changed the way we think about negotiations. The IFS school of thought is based on the idea that we all have different “parts” within us that try to protect us in different ways, and this framework offers surprising lessons for how we show up in high-stakes conversations. Our conversation covers: Why curiosity work...

In this episode, we break down one of the most overlooked negotiation traps: how people give away their leverage when they think they’re actually helping their case. From revealing salary history to competing offers to personal disclosures, even senior leaders can unintentionally anchor themselves low and limit their earning power. Our conversation covers: How one of our high performing, executive...

In this episode, we discuss a common dilemma: how to negotiate when the job opportunity came through a referral. Many people hesitate to negotiate in these situations out of fear of seeming ungrateful or straining the relationship that helped them get in the door. We share how to approach these conversations without creating awkwardness or risking the relationship. Our conversation covers: Why a w...

This week we’re joined by Alex Daniels, founder of Decrypted Law and a JD-MBA who is ex-Google, has advised startups and investors during his time at Cooley, and now through his own practice. Alex helps founders and employees navigate legal complexity and drive equitable outcomes through intentional legal design. We explore the structures that keep negotiations ethical, equitable, and grounded in...

In this episode, we’re joined by corporate attorney and SaaS dealmaker, Omeed Tabiei, whose career spans Hyperloop’s moonshot years, two startups of his own, and now a boutique legal firm that helps software founders from incorporation to exit. We dig into how negotiation really works across the startup lifecycle: pricing your services, converting cold outreach into warm relationships, and protect...

In this episode, we’re joined by Mariane Bekker: engineering leader through six exits, former Director of Engineering at Mindbody, and founder of the 80k-member tech community, Founders Bay. Our conversation explores pay and negotiations from the hiring side, how bias actually shows up in offers, and how women (and allies) can ensure fair offers from both sides of the table. We cover: How to avoid...

This week we’re sharing a live workshop we hosted with Marianne Bekker (Managing Partner, Founders Bay) on how founders can negotiate across every phase of the startup journey, from co-founder splits to investor terms, design partners, vendors, and early hires. Gerta walks through a practical framework for keeping leverage, avoiding common traps (like giving numbers/ranges), and aligning deals to...

In our first in-person interview, we sat down with David Carvalho: entrepreneur, veteran DJ, and the man behind some of San Francisco’s most iconic tech and music events. For more than two decades, David has booked talent for Dreamforce, the Super Bowl, and private gatherings for Silicon Valley’s most influential leaders, while also performing at Coachella, Ultra, Outside Lands, Giants, Warriors,...

We often get asked, "What does a negotiation service look like?" In this video, we go into detail on exactly what our clients experience when they work with us to negotiate their compensation. If you're in the job search or expecting upcoming negotiations, book a free call with us to get free negotiation tips for your situation and to explore if we're a good fit to work together! Find a time here:...

In this episode, we unpack the exact words and phrases that quietly tank negotiations, and what to say instead. A recent study conducted by Neil Rackham shows skilled negotiators use far fewer “irritator words” like “fair,” “reasonable,” and “generous,” because those labels backfire. We cover: The “irritator words” to avoid based on the study (“fair offer,” “reasonable,” “generous”) and simple, be...

In this episode, we tested AI against some of our most common negotiation questions to find out where it helps, and where it confidently steers you wrong. On paper it looked helpful, but the devil was in the details; the results were a mix of good reminders and dangerously misleading shortcuts. We covered topics like: Why “market data” (Glassdoor, Levels, Blind) rarely moves real offers, and what...

In this episode, we cover: A real-life example of an offer letter from a major company that seemed to grant $50K/year in equity, but turned out to be far less Simple ways to ask for clarity without sounding combative Why assuming best intent helps you keep leverage and relationships intact We also share: A Burning Man story that raised the question: do we negotiate with friends? The classic “split...

In this episode, we cover: Why even world-class professionals with top MBAs and deal-making experience can still mishandle their own salary negotiations The stigma around hiring a coach, and how it’s no different from hiring a trainer, therapist, or MBA consultant to help you level up The gap between knowing good advice and executing it well when the stakes feel high and context matters Why AI is...

This week, we spoke with Kevin Houng, an HR/people business partner, former employment attorney, and one of Alex’s longest friends, who’s helped launch dozens of venture-backed teams and guided executives through complex compensation decisions. In our conversation, we covered: How companies actually decide budgets for open roles, from scrappy startups to Fortune 500 giants Why larger organizations...

For this week’s episode of Gentle Power, we welcome our very first guest: Joe Dillon, founder of Equitable Mediation. Joe has spent nearly two decades helping couples navigate the high-stakes, emotionally-charged negotiations of divorce without lawyers, achieving outcomes that protect both their finances and their future relationships. In our conversation, we explore the surprising overlap between...

In this episode, we cover: Five real reasons offers get rescinded (and how to avoid each) Cordial scripts and mindset shifts to push back safely without burning bridges We also share: Why one client held onto her “Company A” offer - and how it saved her from a late‑stage fallback at “Company B” The “equity‑info blackout” that led to Company B falling through, and the upfront questions she now asks...

For this week’s episode, we are sharing Gerta’s recent interview with Brendan Aronson on the Milvet Podcast, where we discussed actionable negotiation tactics tailored for military veterans transitioning into the civilian job market; insights are just as relevant for people from other backgrounds. In this conversation, we cover: How military service shapes your mindset - and why “service before se...

In this episode, we cover: How to lock in clear price limits with hairstylists, plumbers and other contractors - so you never get surprised by unexpected add‑ons Why spelling out the real problem you need to solve (“I keep getting unexpected invoices”) and your intent (“I run a business and need full visibility”) makes pushback feel natural Tactful scripts for deflecting vague scope creep, communi...

For this week’s episode, we are sharing our recent interview with Lauren McGoodwin from Career Contessa, where we focused on practical tips to improve your next job offer by 5-6 figures. We covered topics and strategies including: Why oversharing destroys your leverage, and how to tactfully deflect “What’s your number?” questions The surprising power of genuine enthusiasm in negotiations How to as...

In this episode, we cover: Focusing on fairness can sabotage the negotiation Sometimes the best move is to just settle and spend your energy elsewhere Your job offer isn’t something you’re lucky to receive; it’s a mutual value exchange Do what’s best for you, not just what benefits the company Don’t take what an employer says at face value Negotiation is a game, and you’re allowed to play it We al...