From One Caregiver to Another

Health and fitness coach Jenn Abbenhaus felt she already had an unusual sensitivity to the needs of her clients with family caregiver responsibilities - and then she became a caregiver for her own grandfather. In this episode, Jenn and host Kay Coughlin get real about taking care of yourself when there’s so much pressure to feel guilty if you’re not focusing 100% of your efforts on being a caregiv...

The planning it takes to go on a break can be intense and stressful, especially for people with family caregiver responsibilities. If doing all the prep just to get out the door makes you want to skip the whole idea of taking a break, but you know you’re desperate for one, this episode is for you. As always, there's no judgment, guilt or pressure here! Find the free Boundaries Community here : Fac...

With so many messages coming at us every day, how do we tune out the ones that aren’t helpful? And how do we sort through it all to figure out what’s useful and what’s not? Join host Kay Coughlin as she encourages all of us to consider this so we can live in a way that’s freeing. As always, there's no judgment, guilt or pressure here. Find the full transcript here : FacilitatorOnFire.net/episode83...

Join host Kay Coughlin as she talks to Kim Terry, executive director of Nancy’s House. Nancy’s House is a nonprofit currently operating on the east coast of the U.S., providing retreats and other services focused on helping family caregivers take better care of themselves. AARP and National Alliance for Caregiving study mentioned: Caregiving in the US 2020 | The National Alliance for Caregiving Na...

If ever there was a question loaded with frustration, alarm, dismay and a touch of dread (okay, maybe more than a touch of dread…), it’s this one: “Do I have to let my in-laws move in with me?” In this episode, host Kay Coughlin talks about how to approach this question thoughtfully, and in a way that takes YOUR needs into account, too. As always, there's no judgment, guilt or pressure here. Read...

What happens when you think about doing less? If it’s hard to even consider, and your mind starts sounding off some alarm bells, you’re not alone. We’ve been conditioned to do more, not less. In this episode, your host Kay Coughlin talks about the reasons it’s so hard to do less, and how you can get started when you are ready. As always, no judgment or guilt, and no pressure! Read the full episode...

Can you really say no and still be a kind person? Yes, you can. In this episode, your host, Kay Coughlin, explains why we confuse these two behaviors and how you can say no and still be kind if you want to. Read the full transcript of this episode here : facilitatoronfire.net/episode79 Find the monthly membership for family caregivers here : facilitatoronfire.net/membership/ Join the free Boundari...

In this episode, host Kay Coughlin talks about ways she is being gentle with herself. Even when our culture seems to be pushing in the opposite direction. Kay gets pretty honest here, in the hopes that something she admits will help you be more gentle with yourself, too. Find the free Boundaries Community here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/. This community is open to everybody - you don't have t...

Gen X and Millennial family caregivers don’t get much attention and don’t get much in the way of resources right now. Yet as the middle generations of adults, we are the silent backbone of our families and of the economy. And we don’t have to put up with being ignored, and left to struggle alone, anymore. As always, there's no judgment and no guilt here. Find the family caregiver membership here :...

What if you could transform “yes” into “HECK YES!” What if you could stop saying “yes” so darn fast, and instead, you could learn to pause before you say “yes?” Join host Kay Coughlin to talk about how to say “yes” from a place that will make your life better and more fulfilling. As always, there’s no guilt and no judgment here. Listen to full transcript here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/episod...

If the thought of saying “no” makes you feel a little (or a lot) uneasy, you’re not alone. Join host Kay Coughlin for this very practical episode on how to say “no” even when you feel uncomfortable. As always, no guilt and no judgment here! Read the full transcript here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/episode75/ Join the membership for family caregivers here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/members...

One of the main reasons we don’t rest is that we’re not taught how to do it. And even if we know how, we’re not encouraged to rest, either. Join host Kay Coughlin for this discussion of some tactics to build rest into your life - one of these only takes one minute! Throughout the episode, Kay references the guide she wrote called “How to Rest,” and you can get that in the Library area here or here...

Humans need rest. It’s a biological fact. Why, then, do we push ourselves to the brink of exhaustion, mental anguish, and physical stress before we finally whisper to someone, “I need a break”? Join host Kay Coughlin in this episode to find out how you can help yourself get a break before you are desperate. As always, no judgment and no guilt! Read the full transcript of this episode here : https:...

If you are fed up with people making and changing plans on you at the last minute (or even worse, cancelling), this episode is for you. Join host Kay Coughlin to hear what you can do so that you don’t have to be the victim of this kind of disrespect any more. Read the full episode transcript here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/episode72 Find the monthly membership for family caregivers here : htt...

Did you know it’s totally normal for family caregivers to feel grief over the way your life used to look? Missing something that’s gone is just grief, and it doesn’t make you a bad person!  Join host in this episode Kay Coughlin to explore this sensitive and somewhat taboo topic. As always, no judgment and no guilt. Read the full transcript here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/episode71/ Join...

Is the saying “I’ve just gotta get through this day” the only thing that’s getting you through most of your days? You’re not alone! Join host Kay Coughlin to find out how to use this very common saying as a clue to get what you really need out of daily life. As always, there's no judgment and no guilt here. Join the monthly membership for family caregivers here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/memb...

Tough love and boundaries. What’s the difference? Does it even matter? There’s room in relationships for both boundaries and tough love. It’s really about knowing what makes them different and knowing which one to use when. Read the full transcript here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/episode69 Find the monthly membership for family caregivers here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/membership/ Join...

Do you ever feel like other people only see you as a caregiver? Does it feel like they’ve forgotten about all the other things that are important to you, too? In this episode, your host Kay Coughlin names this for what it is - an identity crisis - and talks about how to overcome it. As always, no judgment and no guilt! Join the membership here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/membership/ Join the f...

What do you do if you’re a person with family caregiver responsibilities - and your family refuses to cooperate with what you want and need? And what if the person who refuses to cooperate is the person you care for? That’s what host Kay Coughlin is talking about in this episode of the podcast. As always, there's no judgment and no guilt here! Join the monthly membership for family caregivers here...

Join host Kay Coughlin in this episode to learn what self-compassion really is and how it can change your life for the better.. If you think self-compassion is a practice that will make you weak and passive, you couldn’t be farther from the truth! Read full transcript of this episode here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/episode66/ Join the From One Caregiver to Another monthly membership here : ht...

What do you believe about taking care of yourself right now? That’s going to show up in the way you actually take care of yourself (or not). Join Kay Coughlin for this episode about how to notice the beliefs and thoughts that are in your mind right now. So that you can choose what you really want instead. As always, there’s no guilt and no judgment here! Register for "Prioritize You" here : https:...

In this episode, host Kay Coughlin talks about how judging voices don’t have to control your life anymore. Whether the judging is coming from somebody else or from your own mind, you have a choice about how much power it has over you. Full transcript of this episode can be found here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/episode64/ Register for Prioritize You here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/priorit...

Feeling stress is a normal human experience. If you’re tired of hearing unhelpful advice about how to manage it, listen to this episode as Kay Coughlin gives you practical, truly useful tips. Register for "Prioritize You" here (begins April 11, 2022): https://facilitatoronfire.net/prioritizeyou/ Full transcript here : https://facilitatoronfire.net/episode63/ Get Kay's free "How to Rest" guide in t...

In this episode, Kay Coughlin talks about the important difference between being nice and being kind. As people with caregiver responsibilities, we often think we’re at the limits of what we can handle. That’s when a commitment to kindness can make all the difference. There are times for both niceness and kindness, but how do you know the difference? Read the full show transcript here : https://fa...

In this bonus episode, Kay Coughlin reads her article called "What overwhelm is trying to tell you." You can use your overwhelm as a source of data, so that you can ultimately reduce the overwhelm. Read this article at FacilitatorOnFire.net/StopOverwhelm Join the free Boundaries Community here https://facilitatoronfire.mn.co/ Get help with your mental health right away at NAMI.org (National Allian...