FRANKIE AND THE KLITZ

This is bad.  We’re concerned that our parents are overly concerned with courtroom drama on prime-time television. The boomers feel they can’t miss the nightly news because what if they miss the violence, the coroner reports, and the travesty of the human condition?  To put it simply, many of these people made movies based on…

Have you ever had a trash compactor in your kitchen?  If so, can we get a job that makes us rich too?  Do any of you still use a phonebook, DVD player, or rent videos?   Klitz examines the toys that used to be found in cereal boxes and Frankie states he’s done talking to robots…

If somebody wanted a large attendance at their funeral, what would be the ideal age to die?  No really, we want to know. We know it sounds macabre, but there has to be the perfect age to kick the bucket, in order to achieve the largest attendance possible. What is it?  If you die too…

It’s graduation time! Please tell us if someone threw you a graduation party, or if you got a gift besides money. Klitz’ party at his house was so big, he doesn’t even remember it. Think about that. Frankie literally asked him how the party was and Klitz blanked on it, paused, deflected, and replied, “I…

If you could only cook one thing for a BBQ at your house, what would it be?  Klitz doesn’t think the investment of brisket is worth it.   You’ve been to a gangsta party, we all have, but what did you drink and did you properly use a brown paper bag?  O.E? Colt 45? King…

When you were a kid growing up in Quincy, were you a Cardinals or Cubs fan? Both Klitz and Frankie have spent a great deal of time in Chicago. Living in Quincy poses issues when trying to get to a big city like Chicago, St. Louis, or Kansas City; the drive times are 5 hours,…

OMG, do not go see the movie, “Tiptoes.”   The movie has Matthew McConaughey, Kate Beckinsale, Gary Oldman, Patricia Arquette, and Peter Dinklage, and more. Sounds good, right?  Don’t say we didn’t warn you. In the meantime, when you watch this podcast, keep in mind what brand you like more:  Hostess or Little Debbie?  Disregard what…

What Saturday morning cartoons did you watch as a kid?  Thundercats, Smurfs, Muppet Babies?  What time did you wake up on your own and rush downstairs?  Did you pour yourself a bowl of Froot Loops and milk? Frankie and Klitz go through the whole process of trying to figure out what was popular and whether…

Do you put the toiler paper roll on backwards like a savage nincompoop? Please don’t tell Klitz you put it on like a lunatic.   In the pod today, house parties are discussed, along with bedtime rituals, sleepwalking, peeing in the wrong places, and looting.  What would you loot first if you were involved in a…

Where did you hang out in high school? Jack’s parking lot? Music world on Broadway? Hardee’s parking lot? Were you one of the losers driving up and down Broadway all evening from sunset to Midnight? Frankie makes an attempt to rat out all the places where his classmates drank Keystone Light and Red Dog. Klitz…

Does anyone remember the mail-in opportunity to buy 12 CDs or tapes for a penny?  Besides destroying Frankie’s credit, it helped to build western civilization.  Klitz wants to know why the “pop-in” went the way of the Dodo Bird.  The “pop-in” was the act of an entire family just walking or driving over to someone’s house…

If a man doesn’t have a hobby, he’s doing it wrong. Beer brewing may be a hobby, but golf is, for sure. Klitz says that watching football can be a hobby, but Frankie says that watching TV can’t be a hobby. The two discuss whether watching the movies Predator and Rambo made them tougher as…

Christmas is so hard, isn’t it? Do you feel it’s breaking you? Frankie has seen people go broke trying to please their families. Klitz has angered his grandmother at the dinner table, to the point of, well, it’s not good. We need to hurry and get through this holiday before someone gets hurt. Have you…

Ever been to Merkels by The Abbey or the Kay Bee toy store in the old mall?  Ever heard of the K’s Merchandise catalog or the Sears Catalog?  Did you circle the toys you wanted or did you write them out on a piece of paper?  What’s the first Christmas song you learned as a…

FRANKIE AND THE KLITZ: Are kids loyal to each other? Do they run in packs like they used to, back in the day? Can boys be as tight as the boys in the movie Stand By Me or do cell phones ruin the whole experience? Klitz lays out the exact order of the top 5…

This podcast was all about Halloween, but the headline should be “Most Heavily Edited” podcast. Klitz was having way too much fun and Bob had to spend an hour he didn’t have, to make it suitable for  listening.

Tylenol may or may not cause autism, but Fruit Loops cause ADHD.  Is that true? There’s no way to know. Why do women wear make-up?  Are they’re trying to impress other women or is it because they’re trying to imitate a peacock?  There’s no way to know. One thing is for sure: Klitz drinks out…

Frankie wasn’t terribly perky today, but you can always count on The Klitz to turn that frown upside down! It’s football time and Klitz is ready for fantasy football and to get kicked in the nads by Da Bears … again. And Frankie mentions, but doesn’t go into great detail, about his first massage experience.…

This weekend is the big District Street Concert. Frankie is excited to see the official AC/DC cover band, but wait until you hear what Klitz says about it. Who is the King of podcasting and why is Howard Stern getting cancelled? Later, Klitz weighs in, on the pros and cons of the general benefits of lying.…

If the inside of someone’s car is a complete mess all the time, what does the inside of their house look like?  As summer winds down, Klitz wonders if it’s a crime that school starts before Labor Day. Meanwhile, Frankie chastises Klitz for thinking NFL fantasy football is better than college fantasy football. Both of them think…

Frankie and the Klitz are in a bad head space these days. Thinking of horrible ways to die is foremost on their brains lately. What’s your least favorite holiday? For Klitz, it’s New Year’s Day. For Frankie, it’s Christmas. But what’s the dumbest thing out there right now? Hobby Horsing and it’s not even close.…

Would you join a country club?  Is there an Epstein list?  Klitz says no and yes. But what’s really on Klitz’ mind is the commercial for Anacin that came out in the 1950s where toxic masculinity began. But what is toxic masculinity?  What are some examples? Frankie can’t seem to define it when put on the spot.

How many people don’t have an inner monologue? In other words, if you don’t talk to yourself, is it because you don’t have anything between your ears? Quincy seems to have a few different accents and they range between “city” and “country.”  Do you have a city accent or a country accent?

Who plays the lottery and why should we make fun of someone who does? Is health insurance a scam? Nether Frankie, nor the Klitz tip on to-go orders and Frankie is afraid of what will happen when Brittany Boll finds out. Klitz says Father’s Day is dumb and fathers aren’t needed. Hooligans brings you this…

In the classroom as a kid, Klitz never got his mouth taped shut, but it’s possible his teachers tried to deport him. Frankie tries to find the line between hard discipline and not aggravating a parent, which seems to be impossible to find. During the bulk of the podcast, Frankie stares at Klitz in bewilderment…