Football Ramble

Today, we're joined by one of the brains behind the Premier League's 'brainiest' club! Brentford Technical Director Lee Dykes welcomes Kate to the Bees' training ground to talk about the transfer window, how to spot players early, adapting without Ivan Toney, and Lee's views on their west London neighbours, Chelsea. This one is an absolute must-listen! Who would you like Kate to speak to next? Fol...

Think the past couple of months have been, er, sticky for Spurs? You ain’t seen nothing yet. The night before the final day in May 2006, Spurs just needed to beat West Ham to pip Arsenal to the fourth and final Champions League place – but then, they s****ed themselves because of a dodgy lasagne.  Marcus, Pete, Vish and Jim reinvestigate one of the most dramatic plot twists to any Premier Lea...

Pete got his top off within the first 20 seconds of this. And who can blame him! He’s covered in pig piss after all… Marcus, Jim and Pete react to the most treasured 0-0 draw of the season which saw Newcastle guarantee Champions League qualification for the first time in over 20 years and Leicester guarantee… a fair go at staying up. Plus, who’d be the funniest team to get relegated and which Euro...

Manchester City are the champions, but we all know who the real winner was this weekend. That’s right, Big Sam found a fiver on the touchline. Jules, Vish, Jim and a pig piss-soaked Pete Donaldson take in the penultimate weekend of the Premier League season, where we ask whether a dog or an olive tree is to blame for Arsenal’s capitulation, whether West Ham should build a statue of Jules Breach, a...

West Ham are in a European final! Sheffield Wednesday gave us one of the most dramatic nights of the season! And José Mourinho’s Roma… yeah, well they drew 0-0 with Bayer Leverkusen and had one shot to progress to the final of the Europa League. Vintage. Marcus, Vish, David and Jim chew on all of that with their Bobby Dazzlers (more on that, too) and discuss why Frank Lampard’s Chelsea will defini...

Dotun and Andy are joined by Miguel Delaney to discuss perhaps THE best single performance by an English team in Europe we’ve ever seen and what has brought us to this moment. We also speculate about the future for Real Madrid and whether this should really signal for a changing of the guard, both on the pitch and in the dugout. And would you rather be Inter - with a Champions League final to look...

You know what is far from perfect though? DJ Grealo’s set in the metaverse! That’s right, Pete went in there and he brings news. Pete, Vish and Jim munch on that, how Man City’s continued march to European silverware has left us feeling, and one of the best 45 minutes of football we’ve ever seen, which left even Don Carlo and his eyebrows completely powerless. We also discuss the real treble: Vish...

With Borussia Dortmund and Bayern locked in an epic title race, Andy had to head over to Dortmund to share the roar of the Yellow Wall for a crucial showdown with Borussia Mönchengladbach. He speaks to former Dortmund player Patrick Owomoyela about that fabled atmosphere and meets some very unusual Dortmund fans who have come all the way from… Dumbarton?! Where should Andy head to next? Find us on...

Close to 10 years to the day since Sir Alex Ferguson’s final game as manager of Manchester United, we had to look back at the defining game of his career. Or really, the defining two minutes of it. Marcus Speller, Luke No-friends-at-the-pub Moore and Vithushan Wee Nipper Ehantharajah reminisce about Manchester United’s extraordinary turnaround against Bayern Munich and Ferguson’s role in it all. F...

Leicester City are falling deeper into the mire and inexplicably Jonny Evans - the oldest man in the world - is the only one being asked to drag them out of it.  Pete, Vish and Jim react to last night’s damaging defeat to Liverpool, while after Howard Webb’s appearance on Sky Pete reveals some exclusive audio of what video assistant referees and their on-pitch colleagues are REALLY saying to...

It might be the fourth time we’ve said this, but Arsenal’s title dreams are surely, FINALLY over. Can someone tell Jim? Pete, Jim, Vish and Andy hop aboard Jordan Pickford’s bouncy castle to react to that, Southampton and Rishi Sunak finally levelling down, and the chaos at Elland Road that definitely had Big Sam rubbing his hands but probably also biting through Patrick Bamford’s violin strings o...

Marcus Speller returns! Open those gates to the weekend and run free. David Moyes is ready to cut some shapes, that’s for sure. That troubling news aside, Marcus, Jim, Andy and Vish also chew the fat over new not-so-cunning Bond villain Sam Allardyce and his no doubt affectionate reunion with Newcastle’s away fans. Plus, Arsenal face a tough test (aka angry Roberto De Zerbi), the play-offs are her...

Nicky Bandini joins us from Milan to relive a truly once-in-a-lifetime atmosphere at San Siro. How did Inter take control of this tie so decisively? We discuss 37-year-old (yes, 37-year-old!) Edin Džeko’s performance and ask where it went wrong for Milan. After a week of celebrations, we also take in the significance of Napoli’s title win. Does it really matter if this is just a glorious one-off?...

With the play-offs around the corner, today we have the pleasure of sitting down with one of the protagonists right in the thick of it: Luton Town manager, Rob Edwards! Kate heads to Luton’s training ground to ask Rob about how his own playing career prepared him for this, the brilliant underdog spirit of Kenilworth Road, and Luton Town’s very real dreams of reaching the Premier League. Who would...

It was a big night in the Champions League last night and there is one burning question that we have to ask: Did you see what Man City were wearing pre-match? Fashion choices aside, there was plenty for Pete, Luke and Vish to enjoy from the game including Dani Carvajal making it his personal mission to hunt DJ Grealo and Carlo Ancelotti seemingly not understanding that managers could get yellow ca...

As the Champions League semi-finals return, we simply had to turn back the clock to May 2019, when something quite incredible went down at Anfield in the final four of that season’s competition. Marcus, Luke and Andy share their stories and hot takes on one of the greatest European nights ever, as Liverpool did the unthinkable and then Barcelona proceeded to do the unaffordable in the months after...

Pete, Vish and Jim bring their judges’ scorecards after Arsenal and Newcastle slugged out a proper humdinger. Arsenal edged that one because they re-watched All or Nothing beforehand, apparently. Elsewhere, David de Gea’s playing 4D chess ahead of renewed contract talks, while Fancy Frank finally got a Chelsea win and Big Sam reminded us what we’ve all been missing. Barclays galore! Follow us on T...

It’s Big Sam’s coronation weekend! Today, Jules, Jim, Andy and Pete have gathered to celebrate not one but two coronations, as Napoli’s party boat officially set sail last night after winning their first Scudetto in 33 years. Elsewhere, Pete fears for the fish, as there was a party in another seaside location after Brighton’s late winner against Man United last night. Plus, we asked whether Jack G...

PSG are The Wombles of European football. That’s the conclusion that Dotun, Andy and David come to when trying to work out when PSG will ever not be in a transitional period. Today, we discuss Messi’s suspension from PSG and why he is heading for his second backdoor exit in a row. Plus, Dotun asks “why are we waiting” as Napoli’s title celebrations are put on hold and we hear all about the “Sam Al...

The footballing gods have delivered! We’ve been served up the best piece of Barclays news of the season so far. Big Sam Allardyce has been given four games to save Leeds United and Pete, Luke and Jim couldn’t resist jumping on to record a pod and revel in the news. Although this is good news for the Ramble we do accept that it's probably not great for Patrick Bamford...anyone for a culture clash?...

We saved the best Newcastle-themed Ramble Guide till last! Today, we look back on one of the most baffling, thrilling and things-you-don’t-like-to-see-but-actually-really-want-to-see moments in Premier League history. That’s right, it’s the moment Lee Bowyer attacked his own Newcastle teammate, Kieron Dyer. And then the moment their manager, Graeme Souness, challenged them both to a fight. Join Ma...

Imagine your loudmouth mate left your hometown, became one of the Premier League’s most fearsome strikers and secured a Premier League title, an FA Cup triumph and a Ballon d’Or nomination. Well, no need - Jamie Vardy did just that. Marcus, Andy, Luke and Jim get the party started with a look back over a phenomenal journey of grit, determination and shithousery. From gradually making a name for hi...

A chaotic game that benefited absolutely no one but was pure Barclays through and through. That calls for only one Reacts trio: Pete, Jim and Vish! They discuss Jordan Pickford’s colour printer, Sean Dyche’s nose-picking penchant and whether Brendan Rodgers’ trip to Mount Blanc is going to give Leicester the edge. Plus, could Alan Pardew end up at Leeds? Follow us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok a...

After all the badge chat on Friday, Jim’s decided that the animal on Tottenham's logo is actually a silly goose. There's no rest for Spurs fans just yet as today Jules, Vish, Jim and Andy are here to pick apart that sensational barn-burner against Liverpool! We also have to break the news to Jürgen Klopp that he is in fact now old. Once that’s out of the way, we take a moment to show our admiratio...

Ryan Mason picked his favourite Tottenham hoodie out of the club shop last night and lead Spurs to a credible draw. Today Pete, Luke, Jim and Vish are here to try and work out whether playing The Stone Roses as the players went down the tunnel for half-time was the turning point for Spurs. Elsewhere, Vish is made to defend his claims that Joe Willock shouldn’t play for England - Spoiler: it doesn’...