Fluent in Friendship

You've heard it: "Stop masking. Be yourself." But masking got you the job. It got you through the party. It works—and that's the hard part. This episode breaks down the three modes of social adaptation, why they're not the same thing, and how to make actual choices about where your energy goes. In this episode: • The difference between learned skills, strategic performance, a...

You're not imagining that feeling that everyone else got a manual you never received. The social rules you've been trying to learn weren't designed for how neurodivergent brains work. They were designed by neurotypical people, for neurotypical people. This episode reframes the struggle from "I'm failing" to "I'm translating between systems." In this episode: • The double empathy problem • Why soci...

Every social skill has a purpose (what you're trying to communicate) and a delivery method (the specific behavior). If the standard delivery method doesn't work for your body, you can serve the same purpose through a different channel. Fluent in Friendship breaks friendship down into skills you can learn with clear guidance instead of vague advice. Every episode is free. Full exercises, wo...

When you replay a social moment while stress hormones are still running, you're rewriting it worse each time. One useful move is to wait until the physical stress clears before you decide how it went. Then, you can evaluate it with evidence-based questions. You'll learn:• Why your immediate post-event assessment isn't always accurate • The 24-Hour Rule for when to evaluate what really...

This episode teaches a simple three-question framework for predicting how much energy a social event will cost *before* you go, so you can plan real recovery time afterward instead of discovering you need it when you're already wrecked. Most advice tells you to "take a break if you need one" — which isn't useful, because the crash usually arrives after you've already committed to three more things...

AI Prompt: Be my practice partner. ROLE-PLAY: When I ask, play someone I might talk to—coworker, acquaintance, someone at an event. Respond naturally, not perfectly. Include realistic awkward moments, unexpected topic changes, and the kinds of responses real people give—not ideal responses. FEEDBACK: When I describe something I said or plan to say, be direct. Was it too long? Did I acknowledge the...

In this episode, I walk through the Reset Breath: a simple 4 seconds in, 6 seconds out breathing technique that signals your nervous system back to baseline so you can think, decide, and respond like yourself again. I also touch on what to do when your environment is the real problem, how to buy yourself breathing room mid-conversation without anyone noticing, and why bathrooms are the unsung hero...