Flow: better conversation in a complex world

Sheila Das investigates the role of silence, whether the pauses in conversation or of conversation. Why may we want to create them and linger? How do the faux silences that pepper our modern societies, like contactless groceries, affect us? If we are to create more deliberate spaces, like meditation or retreats, that allow for silience, what may emerge in conversation? Maybe greater togetherness....

In our first audio essay, Sheila Das reflects on the unique gains in conversing with old friends and how to keep making it better. Breaking with some of the current trends that push us to acquire social media "friends," find new friends or even AI companions, Sheila shows, through psychological studies and personal experience, a richness that infuses these conversations based on time, knowledge an...

Megan Fritts guides us through the changes Large Language Models are making on our conversational skills, expression and content. LLMs (whether ChatGPT, Claude or Gemini) are wildly popular and widely used to lighten our workloads. But what about the effects on our connection with each other? We consider particular desires for more time for conversation (e.g. by reducing women's domestic labou...

Megan Fritts guides us through the changes Large Language Models are making on our conversational skills, expression and content -- and not for the better. LLMs (whether ChatGPT, Claude or Gemini) are widely used to outsource our written communication. But what are the effects on conversation? We consider desire for more time for conversation (e.g. by reducing women's domestic labour) and more...

La conversation pour recréer l'espoir? Charles Clermont, membre fondateur de Kafou Lespwa (Carrefour de l'espoir), partage avec nous pourquoi et comment il a fait naître cette organisation qui a pour mandat de nourrir chez les Haïtiens le dialogue et la confiance pour travailler ensemble à un avenir de paix et de collaboration. Est-ce que c'est possible? A-t-il les pieds sur terre? On s'interroge...

Mark Kingwell is one of the most prominent voices in Canada calling for the openness of civil conversation. He shows how our discourse has been changing and why key gains, like justice, need a fresh consideration. And we examine some of the modes of conversation today that steer us off course, like addiction to conviction, community identities, and slogans. It’s not just MAGA! But the risks loom l...

Mystery writer Sophie Hannah turns to untangle the mystery of self-talk behind grudge creation in her acclaimed book How to Hold a Grudge (2018). Sophie and I return to grudges to lay out how at least some of us can be happier by making good grudge stories. We compare Ekhart Tolle's version of story-telling, and consider the roles of memory and boundary setting. Finally we segue to inner dialogues...

Hairstylists deal with a lot when they are talking with us. Having clients from all walks of life, they manage wide-ranging relationships, through our highs and lows, all the while channelling their artistry to create our desired look. How do they perform this balancing act between the work they are paid for and the talk that is expected? Two of my favourite hairdressers, Shawn Keith MacDonald and...

Kazu Haga explores conflict and how we can talk it out… so we can change the world. Kazu dreams big. And so do I. We delve into why these conversations are so hard, and how shifts in attitude and approach -  with a fierce vulnerability - may make them less confrontational and more of an invitation. Starting from personal harm we move to consider responses to larger scale harm in political divisive...

If spoken language is the essence of conversation, linguist Julie Sedivy reveals how we grapple with it to make sense of the world, each other and ourselves. From babies to chatbots, Julie unspools its singular importance by explaining language sounds that bond us, meanings that push us apart, and filler words and the unsaid ambiguities that we regularly navigate in between to chart feeling and th...

How can two populations talk to each other across the divide of language? Montreal writer David Homel talks about his experience translating Quebecois French literature and if he thinks translation may help the "two solitudes" of anglophone and francophone Canada come together. We get into David's role as a journalist and "translating" Quebec culture for audiences in France too and how he found hi...

Today is my first episode in French! So let me first just say “Bienvenue, chers auditeurs francophones”, and to my English listeners, I invite you to read through the translated transcript that you can find a at FlowwithSheilaDas under “Episode Extras.” Enjoy! Nous sommes avec Dominque Garand, professeur de littérature à l’UQAM, qui discute de sa passion de toute une carrière, à savoir, la polémiq...

Sheila Liming, author of Hanging Out, looks at the invaluable if ordinary activity of taking time to chill with folks. We tend to think of hanging out as unstructured and often impromptu shared time, like I drop by your place and we do what comes to mind, eat what's on hand, say whatever pops into our head. Low stakes, leisurely and casual. And there are specific conversational advantages to this...

Political journalist and writer Stephen Maher examines how Canadian political leaders are influencing the national conversation, just as things seem to be heating up in Parliament with the NDP dissolving the Liberal-NDP alliance and the Conservatives and the Premier of Quebec calling for a non-confidence vote in the current federal government. Three years ago, as my very first guest on Flow, I spo...

Anna Goldfarb, author of Modern Friendship, is here to help us face a world of thinning connection and rising loneliness head on. Anna gets fired up about how creating closer friendships is in our hands but needs a fine-tuned communication. We focus on how understanding desire and delight can turn our social lives around - from the moment we craft our invites to when we are hanging out together. I...

Charlie Morin, transmasc writer and artist, is bringing out the laughs in transmasculine life with comedy sketch. I think the silly and the strength in laughing at our own trials helps make life better and our mishaps more bearable. But the comedic take on transmasc life is largely absent from the general cultural conversation, so often centered on difficult questions and tragic realities. Charlie...

Mockery, conspiracy theories and scapegoating are just too much fun. This is the Charles Blattberg encore where the political philosopher and I go deeper into the threats for meaningful, political, `patriotic` conversation by untangling the dangers of fun. We discuss the derailment play causes here, and tease out other aesthetic forms, such as idealizing beauty, spectacle, and fantasy. Then we exa...

Charles Blattberg, political philosopher at Université de Montréal, explains why conversation should be our first choice in resolving conflict, followed by negotiation then pleading, all of which differ in practice and goals. We discuss the win-win scenario of reconciliation as stemming from Aristotelian ideas about the common good and well-being, while exploring how the fragility of conversation...

Kim Samuel, author of On Belonging: Finding Connection in an Age of Isolation, helps us explore how our conversation, as well as the structures and systems we live in, create connection. Beyond the multifaceted ways belonging may be built in our lives, Kim proposes why we all have a right to it.  On the flipside, we look at who is feeling socially isolated today and why... spoliler alert: it`s not...

Bob Ramsay, known to be "one of the most connected men in Toronto" explores how he has gotten to know, learn, and help people over coffee. His relationships, his own work in his speaking series, and travel experiences all got better from having a cuppa. A outstandingly regular practice has led to key takeways: from how follow-up after a coffee to move your career along, talking across the intergen...

Raja Khouri, who’s Palestinian, and Jeff Wilkinson, who’s Jewish, share their perspectives on the possibility of dialogue between their communities in the Canadian context - even during the present conflict. Both long-time advocates for intercommunity exchange, and co-authors of ´The Wall Between: what Jews and Palestinians don`t want to know about each other’, they show us how to bridge the divid...

Julie Sondra Decker shows how asexuals are silenced when denied as a “real” orientation, not divergent enough by queer groups, or overlooked by some sex-positive advocates. We look at how silencing then reverberates in TV shows, institutions and personal violence. But how has the scene been changing? And what can we do about it through our conversations? Julie is a leader and advocate in the asexu...

Mary Chiu explores the life-affirming role conversation has for people living with Alzheimer`s and dementia and how these diseases affect their ability to communicate and can contribute to painful isolation. The good news is there’s a whole host of strategies to help caregivers, at every stage of progression, to foster dignity, connection and community. We go beyond the "Do’s and Don’ts" to really...

Matt Goldberg is founder, artistic director and co-host, together with Deb Van Slet, of Confabulation --  well-known and well- loved in the Montreal and Canadian-wide storytelling community.   A monthly show of people telling their own true life stories – now in Montreal and Victoria, my hometown. Confabulation has a podcast of the stories with interviews of the storytellers, gives workshops, and...

Shane O`Mara, professor of neuroscience at Trinity College Dublin, joins me to discuss how conversations shape our worlds. We draw on his latest book, Talking Heads, coming out this August (!) in which he demonstrates how our conversations, our stories, enter our brains, create memory, and unite us to propel us forward, both as individuals and as nations. Why does this grab me so much? Well, what...