First Down Dawgs

The NFL offseason is officially chaos. This week the Dawgs break down the wild start to NFL free agency, including questionable quarterback moves, massive spending, and why the Geno Smith Jets rumors might be one of the strangest storylines yet. The conversation spirals into franchise tags, overpriced wide receivers, running backs getting disrespected, and why NFL free agency now feels like “The P...

This week it’s just Kurt Money and Jonny Parlay holding it down and somehow we covered Epstein files, Chicago Bears geography, and a Jets Super Bowl simulation from DraftKings. It’s peak offseason brain. With nothing but 193 days until Week 1 and zero real football news, we spiral into: 🔊 This episode includes: – NFL teams ranked by “Epstein file mentions” (yes, really) – The Houston Texans being...

The Super Bowl is over… and we’ve got questions. Who had it worse — Geno Smith, DK Metcalf, or the Minnesota Vikings? Are the Patriots actually the worst team to ever make a Super Bowl? And did anyone at your party actually watch the game… or just their boxes? This week the Dawgs break down: 🔊 This episode includes: – Geno Smith’s Super Bowl meltdown – DK disappearing on the biggest stage – The P...

In Episode 110 of First Down Dawgs, it’s Super Bowl week and the Dawgs are locked in… and losing their minds. Jonny Parlay, Kurt Money, Trip’s Picks, and Katie Ka$h cover the strangest week in football with all the energy of a Groundhog Day fever dream. 🦡 What’s Gobbler’s Knob and why is it a punishment? 🧠 Is Drake May secretly injured? 🍞 Who brought banana bread to the podcast? 📉 Why are 65%...

This week’s episode is a ride... NFL conference championships are here, and the Dawgs are fired up about bad wedding timing, back-from-the-dead quarterbacks, and recovering porn stars getting screen time during games. 🔊 In this one: – Who the hell schedules a wedding on Conference Championship weekend? – Abella Danger in the crowd and the ESPN fallout – Is Sam Darnold’s revenge arc real? – Should...

This week’s episode is a ride... NFL conference championships are here, and the Dawgs are fired up about bad wedding timing, back-from-the-dead quarterbacks, and recovering porn stars getting screen time during games. 🔊 In this one: – Who the hell schedules a wedding on Conference Championship weekend? – Abella Danger in the crowd and the ESPN fallout – Is Sam Darnold’s revenge arc real? – Should...

The Dawgs are off the rails this week in one of the most unhinged episodes to date. From foot pic empires to Mike Tomlin walking away from the Steelers, nothing is off-limits in this NFL Wildcard Weekend recap. We talk bad coaching, good backup QB jobs, and the dangerous world of trying to get paid on the internet. Oh, and someone tried to sell foot content — and now everyone wants a cut. Includin...

The Dawgs kick off Wild Card Weekend in true unhinged fashion. Katie’s face is on fire (literally), the Steelers are limping into the playoffs, Chase Daniel is officially everyone’s hero, and we learn the true art of laser hair removal. Oh, and there’s still a full playoff slate to break down. It’s a whole new season… and we are hairless. 🔊 This episode includes: – Steelers vs Texans: Can Rodgers...

Week 18 madness is here, and the Dawgs are in full playoff mode — sort of. Steelers fans are losing their minds, DK Metcalf is haunted by a mystery fan, and Tom Brady might actually control the internet. We’re talking trash, making last-minute picks, and trying to survive the flu and fantasy losses. 🔊 This episode includes: – Steelers playcalling disaster: who’s even calling the shots? – DK Metca...

Week 17 is pure chaos and somehow this season keeps getting worse. We’re officially in desperation mode as the standings tighten, last place is still wide open, and people are getting beaten by robots, ladies, and basic math. Add in Jets misery, Panthers optimism (for no reason), Steelers–Browns hatred, and Aaron Rodgers refusing to throw the ball more than five yards, and you’ve got a perfect NFL...

This week is unhinged in the best way possible: Catheters, colonoscopies, quarterback conspiracies, and why Michael Jordan might outlive us all (at least in sneaker sales). We go deep on the Bengals’ future, Joe Burrow’s contract drama, and why Jets fans will trade every first-round pick to get him. Also: – The best and worst anesthesia stories – Does Burrow pull a Luck or become the next Stafford...

It’s December, stress is high, and the Dawgs are unraveling faster than Lamar Jackson in the red zone. This episode starts with holiday panic and ends in full-blown quarterback conspiracy theories. From Guardian Caps to emergency QBs, it’s one of the most unhinged episodes of the season. 🔊 This episode includes: – Holiday anxiety, rage emails, and self-scheduled therapy – Are the Steelers cursed...

This week, the Dawgs are barely holding it together as NFL Week 13 delivers another round of broken picks, broken quarterbacks, and broken spirits. We cover everything from Disney viruses and dirty sodas to Vikings futility, Bengals chaos, and whether Aaron Rodgers is morphing into a Home Alone villain. Also, Robin the Robot continues her downward spiral, and one host openly considers canceling pi...

It’s our 100th episode, and the Dawgs are unhinged in the best way possible. From conspiracies to quarterback chaos, NFL Week 13 delivered the weird — and we’re here for all of it. We debate if Jameis Winston is the most entertaining QB in the league, if Kirk Cousins deserves the nickname “Daddy Kirk,” and why punting from the 29-yard line should be a felony. 🔊 This episode includes: – Jameis Win...

It’s our 100th episode and Thanksgiving is in full effect! The Dawgs go full mukbang-mode while breaking down the NFL’s Thanksgiving slate, talking cranberry sauce trauma, sharing wild Turkey Day traditions, and throwing shade at quarterbacks who forgot how to play football. We officially introduce the “Pass The Leg” bet, the best (or worst?) Thanksgiving family gambling tradition. Plus: we talk p...

This week, the Dawgs dive into everything from blown NFL picks to high school reunions, donuts, and Dancing With the Stars conspiracy theories. It’s chaos from start to finish as they roast the Jets (again), attempt to make sense of the playoff picture, and uncover the secret lives of football fans in Spain. 🔊 This episode includes: – A failed follower mission in Madrid 🇪🇸 – Fenway Park game day...

The Dawgs are unhinged this week with ESPN Bet already dead, NFL coaches wildin’, streaming apps out of control, and the Steelers officially broken. It’s betting chaos, football meltdown season, and reunion regrets. 🔊 This episode includes: – RIP ESPN Bet: We hardly knew you – YouTube TV beef + Disney pricing rants – Wildest game ever: Kings Point vs. Coast Guard at Fenway – Senior day blues and...

This week, the Dawgs spiral into NFL madness, sugar crashes, and existential crises. We admit we were DEAD wrong about the Seahawks and Sam Darnold (we’re sorry), dig into the worst defenses in the league, and break down what’s real, what’s fake, and what’s just a sugar-induced fever dream. 🔊 This episode includes: – Sam Darnold’s revenge season with the Seahawks – Joe Flacco is throwing missiles...

What do robot butt wipers, $600 poop-analyzing toilets, paper towel rationing, and the absolute collapse of the Steelers defense have in common? They all make it into this week’s chaotic ride through football, gambling, and life. 🔥 In this episode: – Kurt loses it over the Steelers defense (WHO is the coordinator?!) – The gang debates the perfect bet size (Jonny's running a sportsbook with 23...

🎙 Hosted by Johnny Parlay , Kurt Money , and Katie Ka$h This week’s episode gets real unhinged, and we’re not mad about it. From Dancing With the Stars conspiracy theories to Jets implosions , Flacco throwing Hail Marys at 73 , and debating whether Zach Wilson should be kidnapped back to New York — we cover the chaos across the league and beyond. 🧠 Inside this week’s madness: – Do the Dolphins ha...

Katie Ka$h is out this week — so naturally, we’re talking feet pics, NFL frauds, and a Detroit restaurant phone tree breakdown. Chaos reigns. Bread was brought, coaches were fired, and our bets still suck. Welcome to First Down Dawgs. This week’s madness includes: 🏈 NFL Coach Firings – Brian Callahan gone, who’s next? 🏈 Micah Parsons vs Jamar Chase – Who’s got more tackles? 🏈 Tyreek Hill Watch...

This week, the Dawgs finally lock in the loser bet and it’s as humiliating as ever: panhandling in your team’s gear. And to make it official, we bring in a special guest to choose the punishment, NFL and Rutgers legend Mohamed Sanu. From his time with the Bengals to his Rutgers roots, Mo joins the show to talk football, life after the league, and deliver the final word on our season-long bet. Mean...

Another week, another losing ticket. The Dawgs are back and the NFL is on fire... or maybe just broken. This week’s chaos includes: – Tyreek Hill’s brutal knee injury, legal issues, and 10-kid legacy – Is Tua Tagovailoa done targeting Hill for good? – Derrick Henry might be cooked – Daniel Jones and the myth of being “back” – Jackson Dart enters Giants lore – Jamar Chase, Justin Herbert, and Aaron...

This week’s episode of First Down Dawgs with hosts Jonny Parlay, Kurt Money, and Katie Ka$h is a full-blown NFL meltdown. – Gambling is ruining our lives (but we’re still betting 🫠) – MrBeast NFL takeover – genius or evil? – Tyreek Hill, Derrick Henry, and Daniel Jones drama – Christian McCaffrey, Micah Parsons, Lamar Jackson & Joe Burrow injuries – Is Jackson Dart the savior for the Giants?...

This week, Johnny Parlay, Kurt Money, and Trip's Picks are back in the (sweaty) studio with another unhinged NFL breakdown. It’s Week 3, and the football gods are already laughing.📌 This Week’s Highlights:– Is Tyreek Hill done in Miami? Legal drama unfolds– Josh Allen is flopping like he’s in the NBA– Daniel Jones quietly putting up elite QB numbers– Is it time for Travis Kelce to be a trophy hus...