FBC Minneola

Secular - A visiting preacher was invited to speak at a small country church. At the entrance, he noticed a small offering box with a sign that read, "For the Poor." Feeling a bit generous and wanting to set a good example, the preacher reached into his wallet and dropped a five-dollar bill into the…

Most of us know the story of the angel Gabriel visiting Mary, a young girl in Nazareth. She’s startled when an angel appears about a promise of the long awaited Messiah, the savior. This instance let’s us know that our God is a personal God. One who is closer than a brother. We are going to look at this…

Secular - A young man was training to be a preacher and was practicing his delivery in front of his mentor. The young preacher paused dramatically and declared, "And the Lord said... and the Lord said... and the Lord said..." He repeated the phrase five times, trying to build suspense. The mentor whispered,…

Secular - Notice on a church sign: " 'What is Hell?' Come here and find out! Actual typo found in a bulletin: "Don't forget the bring your coats to the potluck. Also, the annual picnic will feature a new dessert: Jell-O and Satan." (They meant gelatin.) Historical/Cultural Context - This Gospel is written…

Secular - A $50 bill and a $1 bill met on the conveyor belt at the Federal Reserve, both about to be retired and shredded. As they moved down the line, they started chatting about their lives in circulation. The $50 bill puffed out his chest and bragged, "I have had the most amazing life! I’ve been to…

Secular - A pastor was finishing up his sermon on Sunday morning and said, "Next week, I'm going to preach on the sin of lying. To help you prepare, I want everyone to read chapter 17 of the Gospel of Mark." The following Sunday, the pastor asked the congregation, "How many of you read chapter 17 of…

Secular - A woman was worried about her husband who had recently joined the church. She told the pastor, "He's becoming too religious. He wants me to give away my jewelry, sell my expensive car, and donate all our savings to the church!" The pastor paused and asked, "Are you sure he's praying, or is…

Secular - Pastor David loved two things almost as much as his congregation: catchy church signs and golf. One Saturday, he was out on the local course enjoying a beautiful day when he realized he was going to be slightly late getting back to church to change the weekly sign. He rushed over to the church…

Secular - Mrs. Henderson, a pillar of the community and known for her incredibly large, wide-brimmed Sunday hats, arrived at service one morning a bit late. The sanctuary was packed, and the only available seat was next to Mr. Peterson, who was notoriously grumpy and easily distracted. Mrs. Henderson…

Secular - After the Sunday service, Pastor James stood at the door shaking hands as everyone left. Little Noah came up, clutching a dollar bill. He looked serious. “Pastor,” he said, “I want to give this to you.” Pastor James replied. “Why, thank you, Noah! But what’s this for?” Noah shrugged and said,…

Secular - It was a bright Sunday morning, and the kids in Sunday school were unusually restless. Miss Carol, the teacher, was doing her best to keep everyone focused as she started her lesson on the Ten Commandments. She wrote “THOU SHALT NOT” in big letters on the whiteboard and said, “Now, class, these…

Secular - Historical/Cultural Context - This Gospel is written by Matthew, also known as Levi who was a former tax collector. It was most likely written between AD 50-60. Matthew left everything behind to follow Jesus. Matthew wrote primarily to Jewish believers—people who knew the Old Testament well.…

Secular - An elderly lady was walking out of church one Sunday when the pastor stopped her at the door. He smiled and said, “Ma’am, don’t you think it’s about time you joined the Army of the Lord?” She looked at him and whispered back, “Pastor… I’m already in the Army of the Lord.” He raised an eyebrow…

Secular - During children’s church, the Sunday school teacher asked the kids, “Why is it important to be quiet in church?” One little girl raised her hand confidently and said, “Because people are sleeping!” Historical/Cultural Context - This Gospel is written by Matthew, also known as Levi who was a…

Secular - One Sunday morning, the Sunday school teacher was trying to explain how people get to heaven. She thought she’d make it simple, so she asked the class: “Kids, if I sell my house and car, have a garage sale, give all the money to the church, and spend every day helping the poor… would that get…

Secular - Sam was hiking with his friend Jake when they came to a wobbly rope bridge dangling over a canyon. Jake said, “Don’t worry, Sam. Trust me—it’s totally safe!” Sam looked down at the frayed ropes and creaking wood. “Why should I trust you?” Jake shrugged. “Because I’m standing behind you.” Historical/Cultural…

Secular - Two men hired the same contractor. One insisted on the sand—“cheaper and faster!” The other insisted on the rock—“takes longer, but stronger.” The storm hit. The sand house became beachfront property… without the “house” part. The rock house? Still standing, and the contractor said, “Told you—solid…

Secular - I once told myself, “If you take a deeper look, you’ll find the problem.” So I leaned closer… then closer… until I was nose-to-nose with the situation. That’s when I realized— the only thing staring back at me… was my own reflection. Historical/Cultural Context - This Gospel is written by Matthew,…

Secular - There is an old saying, money can’t buy happiness. This is True— but it can buy first-class tickets on a plane, and that’s basically happiness with free meals. Historical/Cultural Context - This Gospel is written by Matthew, also known as Levi who was a former tax collector. It was most likely…

Secular - At church one Sunday, Pastor Jim gave a sermon on forgiveness. Afterward, little Tommy tugged at his mom’s sleeve and whispered, “I’m ready to forgive Uncle Bill now.” His mom smiled. “That’s Great! What did Uncle Bill do?” Tommy frowned. “He hasn’t done it yet. But I know he’s coming to Thanksgiving……

Secular - After church, Brother Caleb proudly told everyone, "If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn the other too!" Just then, grumpy old Larry walked by and slapped him. Caleb calmly turned the other cheek. Larry slapped that one too. Caleb paused, then said, "Okay… now the Bible’s out of cheeks.…

Secular - Old Brother Harold decided to get in shape after the pastor’s sermon on "Walking with God." So every morning, he put on his best sneakers, grabbed his Bible, and marched up and down the church parking lot. After a week, the pastor asked, “Brother Harold, how’s your walk with God going?” Harold…

During Sunday service, the pastor said, "A good attitude is like a clean shirt—people notice when you're not wearing one." Brother Larry shouted, “Amen!” His wife whispered, “Maybe you should try both next time.” Historical/Cultural Context - This Gospel is written by Matthew, also known as Levi who…