Episodes Archives - Shades of Strong

Sometimes support for Black women looks like finally deciding not to keep explaining yourself into emotional exhaustion. In this Support Pause, Shirl explores the emotional cost of constantly going back and forth with people who are committed to misunderstanding you. From family dynamics to friendships, work conversations, and relationships, many Black women have been conditioned to overexplain th...

What would you say to your younger self today? In this deeply personal Support Pause, Shirl reflects on sitting crisscross applesauce on the living room floor watching The Mary Tyler Moore Show and dreaming about becoming a writer long before life got loud. This support pause explores what happens when responsibilities, caregiving, survival, and being “the dependable one” slowly push our dreams to...

We just closed the 26 Black Women Storytelling Series, and I’m still sitting with what it revealed. Not just the individual stories, but the thread that ran through all of them. This episode isn’t a recap. It’s a reflection on what happens when Black women are given the space to tell the truth in real time, before everything is figured out, before the voice steadies, before the story is cleaned up...

Radiah Shabazz Harold was doing what so many women are used to doing. Managing responsibilities. Taking care of what needed to be done. Showing up, even when it wasn’t easy. From the outside, it looked like she had everything under control. But inside, she was carrying more than most people realized. In this episode, Radiah shares what it felt like to move through life while managing chronic illne...

Didi Hairston is doing something many people don’t fully understand. She’s showing up. Not because everything is okay. Not because she has it all figured out. But because she’s choosing to keep going, even while navigating severe depression. In this episode, Didi shares what it’s like to live with mental health challenges in real time. The kind that don’t just pass, and don’t always have clear ans...

Nikquan Lewis learned early how to handle things on her own. Figuring it out wasn’t optional. It was necessary. From a young age, she was navigating responsibilities that required her to grow up quickly. There wasn’t room to pause, and there wasn’t space to fall apart. So she did what needed to be done. And she kept doing it. In this episode, Nikquan shares what it looked like to move through life...

Sadija Smiley had been holding everything together for a long time. Showing up. Taking care of what needed to be handled. Making sure nothing around her fell apart. From the outside, it looked like she had it all under control. But underneath that was a different story. In this episode, Sadija shares what it felt like to keep going while quietly falling apart. The pressure to manage everything on...

Juanita Ingram did everything she was supposed to do. She showed up prepared. She delivered. She handled what needed to be handled. From the outside, it looked like she had it all together. But being the one who gets things done came with a cost. In this episode, Juanita shares what it felt like to move through spaces where she was relied on, but not always truly seen. Where her ability to perform...

Kimberly Sumpter had been doing what so many Black women are used to doing… keeping everything going. Showing up. Handling responsibilities. Making sure everyone else was taken care of. And somewhere in the middle of all of that, she stopped paying attention to herself. In this episode, Kimberly shares what it looked like to keep pushing through even when something felt off. The pace, the pressure...

Chernika Corbett spent years being who she thought she needed to be just to get through. Being strong meant pushing through, holding everything together, and not allowing herself the space to feel what was actually happening in her life. There wasn’t room to fall apart. There wasn’t room to be unsure. There wasn’t even room to check in with herself. And over time, that kind of strength didn’t just...

Emely Rumble learned early what it meant to keep going. After losing her grandmother at 14 and entering foster care, she had to grow up quickly. There wasn’t space to slow down or process what she had lost. Life kept moving, and she learned how to move with it. That pattern followed her into adulthood. In this episode, Emely shares what it looked like to carry grief without space, to keep showing...

Grace Rabia Wood didn’t choose to be strong. She learned it early, in an environment where survival meant staying quiet, staying aware, and getting everything right. Long before she had language for what she was carrying, she was already learning how to read a room, how to anticipate what was coming, and how to make herself smaller when needed. In this episode, Rabia shares what it looked like to...

Dr. Froswa Booker-Drew spent much of her life doing what was expected of her. From an early age, she learned how to be responsible, how to show up, and how to carry what was placed on her without question. It was reinforced in the way she was raised, in what she observed, and in what was expected of her as a girl. And over time, that way of being followed her into everything. In this episode, she...

Simone Gordon is used to being the one people call when they need help. She shows up for her autistic son, her community, and the families who rely on her every day. It’s what she’s known for. It’s what people expect from her. And for a long time, she kept saying yes. In this episode, Simone shares what it looked like to carry that kind of responsibility without stopping to consider what it was do...

Mary Sims has been called strong more times than she can count. But what people didn’t see was what it was taking for her to keep going. In this episode, Mary shares what it looked like to navigate a cancer diagnosis, a stem cell transplant, and the long road of recovery that followed. From the outside, she was surviving something that most people couldn’t imagine. But on the inside, there were mo...

For a long time, Alyson Brown believed being strong meant handling everything on her own. She was showing up, holding it together, and figuring things out without needing much from anyone else. And for a while, it worked. At least it looked like it did. In this episode, Alyson shares the moment her body forced her to stop pushing through. What she thought was just a busy season filled with good th...

  When work becomes your identity, it can be hard to recognize where your job ends and you begin. This episode is story seven of the 26 Black Women Storytelling Series, where Black women share what being strong has cost them, and the kind of support that could have made a difference. In this conversation, Joyel Crawford shares what it looked like to build a career around meeting expectations, show...

Being the strong one can feel like something you don’t question, especially when it’s been a part of your life for as long as you can remember. This episode is story six of the 26 Black Women Storytelling Series, where Black women share what being strong has cost them, and the kind of support that could have made a difference. In this conversation, Shelley Washington shares what it meant to carry...

Being the one everyone depends on can feel like second nature, especially when you’ve spent years showing up, figuring things out, and holding everything together without question. This episode is story five of the 26 Black Women Storytelling Series, where Black women share what being strong has cost them, and the kind of support that could have made a difference. In this conversation, Dr. Candice...

Being an emotional caretaker as a Black woman often starts early, long before you realize just how much you’ve been carrying. This episode is story four of the 26 Black Women Storytelling Series, where Black women share what being strong has cost them, and the kind of support that could have made a difference. In this conversation, Achea Redd shares what it looked like to become the one everyone l...

Being the strong one as a new mother can look like holding everything together on the outside, even when you’re quietly running on empty. This episode is story three of the 26 Black Women Storytelling Series, where Black women share what being strong has cost them, and the kind of support that could have made a difference. In this conversation, Tasha Randle shares what it looked like to return to...

Being the strong one in rooms that were never built for you often comes at a cost, especially when you’ve learned to keep going no matter what it takes. This episode is story two of the 26 Black Women Storytelling Series, where Black women share what being strong has cost them, and the kind of support that could have made a difference. In this conversation, Cynthia “Cyn” Strickland shares what it...

This episode is part of the 26 Black Women Storytelling Series , where Black women share what being strong has cost them (including how chronic pain in Black women is often ignored or misunderstood), and the kind of support that could have made a difference.  In this conversation, Fawn Walker Montgomery shares what it cost to keep pushing through pain and what happened when her body finally said n...

April marks Black Women’s History Month, and this series was created to honor the full, lived experiences of Black women in a way that often gets overlooked. This series centers Black women support stories told in their own words. The 26 Black Women: What Strength Took. What Support Could Have Given storytelling series centers real conversations with Black women about the realities behind being “s...

Understanding How to Answer You Okay When You’re Not When someone asks you “You okay?”, it’s rarely simple, and figuring out how to answer you okay when you’re not can feel like its own emotional maze. This pause sits inside that moment for Black women, because the truth behind that question is often heavier than the world realizes. In this episode, Shirl slows the moment down and gives you space...