Elis James and John Robins

After a frantic morning of plucking and preening, Elis and John are confronted with the beautiful sight of Greg James. Eyelashes are fluttered, beauty tips are garnered, and in a wonderful showing of modern masculinity, four men chat about their hair care routines. And before he can go, Greg’s radio credentials are put to the test in a classic Made Up Game from the vault. Swooning fanfares aside,...

Strap in folks, it’s time for some more Wordle chat! You thought we were done with it? No sir, we, well John, has only just got started. But luckily this is X-rated Wordle chat. Sexy content which really spices up the barrel-scraping etymological discussions. In other happenings, can you explain the Richter scale to a child when at the football? There’s also a week of many wins and losses involvin...

Today we celebrate one of Wales’s finest exports; the Cymru Connector himself, Mr ‘Where-Did-You-Go-To-School’, the one and only Elis James! Yes it’s Elis’s birthday, and he kicks off the show by doing what all 45 year olds do: rapping. After receiving a gift from John that is so thoughtful it almost derails the recording, Elis takes part in an eventful birthday Cymru Connection. Tempers flare, pa...

It’s the annual spooky episode and that means it’s as spooky as any other podcast episode we ever release. In a nice chatty ep shooting the breeze Elis and John uncover the layers of a man who continues to fascinate them: Bell Tower Crispin. But is Dave flouting BBC balance regulations in order to get more great Halloween activities and free car charging? Meanwhile in mouse towers Elis is being in...

What’s it like to share a bank account with John Robins? Austerity Robins: a notification to his device every single time you make a purchase, no matter how small. Well we find out because nothing can get past him, with, in his own words “notifications echoing through his empty life.” Extraordinary scenes today as Dave got chatted up on the way in to the studio. Was it a student prank? Elis’s expe...

The UK’s motorways are now one tour bus quieter. Which perversely probably makes the roads noisier given John’s silent approach whilst inhabiting the Sad Van. And what celebrations happened at the post-tour party at The Palladium? Debauchery and several kilos of Producer Dave's favourite over the counter pharmaceuticals? Not quite. Rather it was a media bigwig zone and John now has regrets about t...

Confidence is the word of the day, with differing meanings for both of our heroes. Does John have enough of the stuff to go through with his edgy scripted intro? Is Elis sufficiently supplied to make his 5th Cymru Connection in a row? It’s all to play for, and play we must. The other word on everyone’s lips is farewell, as the boys bid adieu to the Sad Van. She’s taken out for one last outing as E...

We’re at a crossroads. A vape crossroads. For the dual forces of quicker marathon times and health effects are coming together to fight against the temptations of fruity mist. And John must make a choice. Elsewhere it’s a show of rare beasts: Elis takes it upon himself to get in the grill of a listener and do the sacking, and we dole out a good radio bell for a listener. Is that a first? Plus, Joh...

What’s the best way to round off 39 hours of no sleep? Invite 7 young girls round for your daughter’s birthday sleepover, that’s how! Were there tears? Of course! Did said tears belong to Elis or the kids? Listen to find out. Elsewhere we’re answering the question, ‘is mid-October too early to be talking about Christmas?’ Not in these parts it ain’t, as Elis makes a startling claim about Irish wis...

This show has been many things, but right now this a cockles podcast. Elis’s homecoming show in Swansea was very much tied to whether he could get cockles at breakfast which sets us off on a cockle rollercoaster. But will Dave like them? There’s also a very intense Ask Us Anything, and a 1.5 times playing of the jingle. Plus, what meat would you eat betwixt the sheets? To get in touch with the sho...

If there was an award given out for the ‘Most Tense Moment in the Final Round of a Game Made Up by a Listener’, then this show would win it. Fresh from their triumph at the British Podcast Awards, Elis and John look to add another trophy to the cabinet by creating a moment so contentious and dramatic that it requires the use of VAR; Voice Assisted Referee. Away from the Made Up Game hijinks there’...

It’s 3 croaky voices in the studio today because Elis and Dave have Oasised once again, and poor old John is unwell. Luckily that means a general vibe alignment is struck, but, crucially, the standards do not slip. For Elis and Dave both have tales of struggling to get out of Wembley, and John wonders which of his awards would be best suited to beating off an intruder. The other overriding questio...

Having conquered the earthly plane, Elis and John are taking to the skies. Can they become the first podcast to be recorded entirely in space? Or will the anecdote well run dry too quickly? Back down on Earth there’s a debut trip to Birch Services for Johnny JR, Elis is positively giddy after the pair run round the natural sights of Llandudno, and we hear one of the greatest shame-inducing lines i...

It’s a huge episode for loving Britain, but more importantly it’s a huge episode for cagoules. This is the UK’s number 1 cagoule podcast, and a very special guest has got Elis barking like a waterproof dog in heat. If you’re anti-outer layers then this is not the place to be. It’s slightly lighter ground on the anecdote front as John has just written down ‘Autumn’ and Elis can’t even handle drinki...

In a life full of achievements John may have finally topped the lot. In his 5 year battle with the word game that most people stopped playing a few years ago, John has finally come out victorious. Yes, he’s Wordled in one. It’s a big day. But the main question is, did it make him happy? There’s another chapter of Elis and John’s Road To Nowhere, in which the boys are forced to think on their feet...

473 episodes in and there is still room to excavate the vast intricacies that make up the Pompeii dig of John Robins’ mind. Grab your JCB because there’s a dump truck’s worth to uncover off the back of the latest adventures from the Sad Van. And it all boils down to one thing, as the hotels John’s willing to stay in simply say so much about the man. A generic hotel brand is the vessel through whic...

Move over Oxford Union, debating has a new home! As Elis and John towers has turned into a hotbed of discourse and deliberation. The big topics are given the respect they deserve and the order of service for today is as follows: What’s the saddest song ever written? Hotels: budget or bespoke? And finally, are baths rubbish? Aside from heated arguments about the temperature of bath water, Elis and...

What starts off as a huge day for John (book deadline day) turns into a massive (massive it is) day for poor old Dave. As the saying goes: ‘The best laid plans of podcast producers often go awry’, and Dave’s idea for the team to record remotely gets derailed quite spectacularly by a faulty alarm system. Brace yourselves for the most stressed you will probably ever hear one of the UK’s most unflapp...

The boys have been busy bees recently and the show’s in danger of turning into a Michael Palin travelogue. Elis has returned from France and regales us with stories of visits to ex-military factories, intense chats with German families and Isy’s attempts at speaking French. Then it’s time for the first instalment of Elis and John’s Road to Nowhere, where your favourite podcast hosts drive around t...

The boys are fresh from driving around the country for charity with Ian Botham, which of course means Elis is exhausted and tour newbie Dave is absolutely fine. And there’s more bad news for Mr James as the Elis vote is being split in the Listeners’ Choice vote at the British Podcast Awards. He’s going to get pilloried by one co-host or maybe both. But given that John is more likely to lacerate El...

The ripples of last week’s Elis James mega-rant are still being felt right across the BBC, and despite vowing to ignore the call to pen John’s obituary, Elis has rowed back and done just that. Brace yourself for some emotional heft and candid commentary on John’s propensity for darts at university. But John’s made of sterner stuff these days and recovered to reveal the sighting of a certain car ha...

There’s a surprise in the offing for John. Not that that’s a surprise to him. Nothing gets past old Sherlock Robins. Especially Producer Dave positioning a phone on a table at a very slight angle. But said surprise leads to some incredible finds about Johnny JR which leave Elis and Dave’s jaws on the floor. This was not what had been intended. Elsewhere John has an out of body experience reflectin...

Today’s episode is filled with the big questions of our age. These are the things that government top brass are pouring over day in, day out: Is Martin Lewis up there with Galileo and Mozart? Can you put goodwill on your shelf? And most divisively, is wee ever fine in a paddling pool? It’s a show that asks questions rather than answers them, and you the you the listener are left to make up your ow...

Elis made a bad decision the other day. And if you had a million guesses as to what that decision was then you won’t even get close, even when given the clue "Welsh culture". He's insistent it isn’t the outcome he wanted but John and Dave aren’t sure they believe him. Quite frankly it’s one of the most baffling conversations ever had on this show. Aside from regrettable choices there’s a potassium...

Memory lane is today's destination of choice, as John dons his rose-tinted glasses to reminisce about the time 'an arrangement was made' for him to return to his secondary school to assist in its production of Guys and Dolls. Was he officially invited back? Did John simply turn up because he had nothing else on? We're still not entirely sure, but this proud Assistant Director is giving back in a c...