Death Virgin

What begins as an ordinary Sunday in Maine turns into an unexpected journey through grief, spirituality, memory, and ritual. A spontaneous visit to a medium at the Temple Heights solstice fair leads to questions about the afterlife, writing, and whether the dead really have anything left to say. There are drum circles, neighborhood conversations, cemetery visits, a stolen bottle of birthday whiske...

In the days after her father's death, Kristen discovers that grief isn't always tears. Sometimes it's paperwork, locksmithing, funeral-home visits, Facebook etiquette, warm vodka in plastic cups, and a stubborn hearse that can't quite make it up the driveway. As family and friends drift through the house overlooking the Atlantic, the ordinary and the extraordinary collide. A locked roll-top desk f...

In this final living chapter of Dispatches from Temple Heights , Kristen records in real time as her father dies at home overlooking the Atlantic. What unfolds is not a dramatic television death, but something quieter, stranger, and more human: hospice phone calls, olives for Coronas, oxygen tubes, morphine, family pacing in the kitchen, and the surreal administrative reality that arrives moments...

A few quiet days at Temple Heights. Ryan arrives to spend time with his father and grandfather — a delayed 21st birthday and 50th birthday celebration no one imagined would happen under these circumstances. There are beers on the beach, Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, morphine schedules, Family Feud at full volume, and the strange intimacy of caring for someone at the very end of life. As the nights s...

Dispatches from Temple Heights continues with a wandering walk down to the beach on one impossibly beautiful Maine afternoon. Kristen reflects on first love, old cottages, lobster shacks, disappearing landmarks, family mythology, Spiritualist history, teenage summers, and the strange ache of realizing the places that shaped us never stay the same. Along the way: Ozzy Osbourne t-shirts, mixed tapes...

Seth turns fifty in the middle of hospice care, and somehow the day becomes both heartbreaking and strangely joyful. In this installment of Dispatches from Temple Heights , Kristen recounts a sleepless night, hospice workers who bring humor and humanity into the house, the surreal intimacy of caring for a dying parent, and a birthday celebration filled with Guinness, grocery store cake, party hats...

In the third installment of Dispatches from Temple Heights , the vigil continues. Kristen and her brother Seth make it through another night beside their father’s bed, surviving on raisin toast, gallows humor, ice cream, and adrenaline while waiting for the inevitable. As neighbors stop by, hospice nurses arrive, morphine enters the picture, and Seth’s fiftieth birthday approaches, the episode dri...

In the second installment of Dispatches from Temple Heights , Kristen’s father finally comes home from the hospital to die overlooking the ocean in Belfast, Maine. What follows is a surreal and deeply human twelve hours of oxygen tubes, ice cream runs, commode disasters, family tension, dark humor, and quiet tenderness as everyone adjusts to the strange rhythm of waiting for someone to die. Blendi...

Dispatches from Temple Heights: Notes From My Father's Dying The first episode of a new mini-series within Death Virgin . Kristen records from her childhood home on the coast of Maine as her father lies dying on hospice care in the next room. Over the course of one sleepless night, she reflects on what it means to accompany someone through death for the very first time — while also navigating hosp...

In this episode of Death Virgin , Kristen gets a new hip — and loses a bone. What begins as a routine surgery (everyone says it’s routine) becomes something stranger: a meditation on ownership, body parts, family legacy, and what it means when a piece of you that grew with you is suddenly removed. Before going under anesthesia, Kristen asks the question most surgeons are not prepared for: Can I ke...

In this episode of Death Virgin , Kristen starts the year by reading a full, unruly, prickly, and deeply human obituary—one that refuses to smooth the edges of a life well lived. The obituary of Doris McClintock (1939–2025) is funny, specific, political, tender, stubborn, and alive with detail: pine boxes, black bears, arthritis, grudges, gardens, community, and the refusal to romanticize old age...

Kristen welcomes her first guest, Thao, for an honest conversation about friendship, grief, and the journey through loss. Together, they reflect on their shared history, the evolution of their friendship, and Thao’s recent experience of losing her brother. The episode explores cultural rituals, the physicality of grief, and the importance of storytelling in healing.

Where were you when? When Kennedy was shot? When The Challenger exploded? When 14 people were killed in the Swiss parliament? On September 11, 2001? In this episode, Kristen talks about her own second-hand experiences when she found herself living in Manhattan when the Twin Towers were hit, the concepts of private vs. communal grief, and why we all feel compelled to share "I was there ..." wh...

For the Death Virgin's first mini episode, you'll hear her tribute to the late Robert Redford. How, when she lived in Utah as a teenager, she met him and was even kissed by him.  Rounded out with stories of the United States Film Festival, a cross country move in a Mercury Sable, and a fortuitous tennis match, this episode features lots of gushing about the arguably world's best and most hand...

Kristen delves into the concept of closeness and its subjective nature, pondering what it means to be close to someone and how it affects grief. Kristen mentions feedback from listeners questioning her claim and shares stories of individuals who were significant in her life. She contrasts these relationships with others she wasn't as emotionally close to, and explores philosophical ideas about com...

In this episode of 'Death Virgin,' Kristen delves into the history of how different cultures have approached death and mourning. She begins with the Black Death in the 14th century, describing its devastating impact and the rise of the Dance Macabre. Kristen touches on the modern parallels to the COVID-19 pandemic and the importance of empathy and travel in understanding different cultures. She al...

Kristen, the host of the 'Death Virgin' podcast, discusses her journey of exploring death as someone who has never experienced the loss of a close loved one. She reflects on her childhood memories, societal taboos around discussing death, and how horror movies can serve as a therapeutic medium for dealing with grief. From humorous anecdotes about failed horror movie titles to the ritualistic buria...

In the Maiden episode of the podcast 'Death Virgin,' Kristen Vermilyea, a 56-year-old American woman living in Zurich, Switzerland, introduces her journey into understanding mourning and death. Kristen explains how she has not yet lost anyone super close to her* - a rarity at her age, making her feel underprepared for the inevitable loss of a loved one. She discusses her documentary film 'Death Vi...

In episode two of 'Death Virgin,' Kristen Vermilyea delves into the intersection of death and social media, particularly focusing on Facebook.  She discusses her views on mourning culture online, sharing personal anecdotes and observations about how people use social media to cope with loss. Vermilyea reflects on the emotional complexities of seeing Facebook pages of decea...