Dating Solidarity

In part two, I explore how dating fatigue can leave us brittle, resentful, and quick to snap! I share my own experiences and suggestions for how to maintain a more “supple” approach. ~ THE OVEREXERTION CHECK-IN Ask yourself, “does this feel effortful?” NO → Hooray! Crack on with dating. YES → Ask yourself, “what do I need to feel relaxed and replenished?” A good night’s sleep/a week off the apps/t...

Dating was a veritable merry-go-round. Riding my trusty rusty steeds Hope and Disappointment in an endless loop. Oscillating between giddy highs, convinced I’d found my soulmate, and nauseating lows, convinced I’d be single forever. If you can relate to any of this, I have an idea! I want to see what happens if we meet our reactive thoughts and offer them a companion. Instead of trying to override...

Here’s a summary of five things I think are worth remembering when looking for love: 1. Acceptance, curiosity and self-compassion will help you climb out of dating’s potholes and craters. 2. Non-romantic connection will sustain you whilst you look for a partner. Seeking connection on an “empty stomach” can lead to regrettable choices. Prioritise the people in your life that make you feel seen, saf...

Today’s episode tells two important stories: * Why Dating Solidarity began. * Why meeting “John” in a car park in Keynsham, and having a truly awful date, turned out to be a really good thing. Solidarity Sessions: An hour where you get to share your experiences, release what’s heavy and leave feeling much lighter and more resourced. We can tackle whatever’s coming up right now as well as looking a...

Have you ever been so obsessed with someone that you couldn't think straight? So tangled up in desire that you lose sight of where you end and where they begin? In this episode, I explore limerence – the intense, often involuntary infatuation first named by psychologist Dorothy Tennov in her 1979 book Love and Limerence – and why it's so different from a healthy crush or mature love. I share some...

In today’s podcast, I answer two brilliant – and very relatable – questions from listeners: Q. How do you know if something’s a red flag or if your past experiences are clouding your judgment? Q.  How do you know whether it’s worth seeing someone again if your gut’s telling you no, but they’re really kind, and you’re drawn to that, but the chemistry wasn’t there? Here's some guidance for whenever...

 Today’s snappy lil episode explores: * What to do when the person you’re chatting to suddenly ghosts you. * The three words that define how successful a relationship will be. I hope it helps. Remember, you’re not the only one navigating these challenges. And there is so much you can do to soothe your nervous system and feel empowered again. You are not alone, and this WILL CHANGE. Wonders never c...

Hello! I hope all’s going well. So, over the last few weeks, whilst dripping with sweat, grateful for the bright, long days, feeling cooked alive and eating far too many ice creams, I’ve been working on lots of exciting new content. Part one is very nearly ready, and part two is on its way. So, over the summer, I’m going to press pause on the podcast while I finish building everything behind the s...

1. Never go on a date again Instead, go and chat to someone at a bus stop. I mean this figuratively. What I mean is, every time you go on a date, tell your mind and body that it is not a date. It is simply spending a little bit of time having a chat while you wait for something wonderful. If they surprise you and are something wonderful, absolutely bloody fantastic. But BE IN THE ENERGY of “this i...

Disappointment can be forged into power. Rejection can be the catalyst for profound confidence. Ghosting can be the chrysalis from which you emerge with magnificent wings.   Number 1: Knock Them Off The Pedestal   Imagine finding out something really unappealing about someone you like. Some habit or belief they hold that instantly turns you off. Some behaviour trait that gives you the ick so much...

In today’s episode, I share my story. How a simple mindset shift took me from nearly a decade of disappointment to a proposal in Paris. With a rather luxurious choice between five extremely eligible suitors along the way. Quotes from today’s episode: “ I genuinely thought the best I could hope for was ‘the cream of the dregs’—until I completely shifted my approach, and everything changed.” “The nu...

Today’s episode is intended to be a lovely cool splash of water on a fatigued face. Revitalising tired daters with three new things to try.  Three steps for a dating fresh-up. 1. Re-empower yourself. Pick a date two to six weeks from now and plan something you will LOVE. Until then, date with renewed focus. Try the steps below to approach things slightly differently and see what happens. Once you...

A wonderful listener sent in this question:  Should you resist making the first move if you have an anxious attachment style and a tendency to rush into things? We explore… The enormous value of experimenting with doing the opposite of what you would normally do.  How the way to feel secure is to feel chosen . This involves protecting your energy, rather than giving it away. Creating a playful atm...

How to feel good about yourself while dating... 1. Remember that dating is a problematic means to a glorious end. Just because it feels interminable doesn’t mean it won’t end. Just because it can be extremely hard doesn’t mean it won’t result in more ease, more softness, and extreme delight. Just because it can be the loneliest thing you ever do, doesn’t mean it won’t lead to the most comforting,...