Critical Lit

Deep within the Amber Temple, alone in the dark, lurks the most helpful lich in the multiverse. Play your cards right and there's free drinks and body modifications, too. You didn't need those eyeballs, right? In this episode: Chapter 13 (X18-X33b, Architect's Room, ewer trouble, West Shrine trap, Secret Alcove hijinks, Lich's Lair, becoming buddies with Exethanter, Preserved Library, Barovian wit...

It's back to Barovia for Chapter 13, and the Amber Temple is sending mixed messages. Does it want us to freeze to death? Burn to a crisp? Get possessed by loot? Maybe this adorably bespectacled jackal-faced creature can help us. Nope, just more fireballs. In this episode: Chapter 13 (The Amber Temple history, Extreme Cold, Areas of the Temple X1-X17, Temple Facade, stealing the statues, Temple of...

Our final look at the Caves of Chaos takes 17 man-turns to unpack. The cult fit is very Queen of Hearts and matches the canonically evil furnishings. But the real villain is in accounting. Who else could set up such an enormous slush fund for magic amulets? In this episode: Hobgoblin Lair, Torture Chamber/Playroom/Food Storage, Shunned Cavern, Owl Bear's Den, Bugbear Lair, Caves of the Minotaur, G...

Many yawning orifices await as the spelunking finally begins in earnest! The myriad tribes of the Caves of Chaos have complex social hierarchies, tight-knit family units, commerce, treaties, and their own vintners, but their deaths carry absolutely no moral weight. Exterminate at your leisure. But first, we traipse about the friendly wilderness and hunt nothing at all. In this episode: Adventures...

Dammit granite! If these walls could talk, they'd blush and tell you "murder hole" is not the preferred nomenclature. Gygax continues to wow us with his commitment to verisimilitude (of a sort), but where do all these armored men keep the bathrooms? Fortunately, this keep is at the top of the hill, not the bottom. Just don't ask who's feeding the snakes. In this episode: Rumor Table, Areas of the...

What if "Do as I say, not as I do" was a D&D module? In 1979 Gary Gygax wrote The Keep on the Borderlands, cribbing plenty of useful GM advice from TSR colleague Mike Carr. Prepare yourself, friends, to experience the full power of mine imagination, for I am the Dungeon Master. I speak eternities into existence, only truths fall from my lips. Oh and there's a big fort on a hill. Don't be mean to t...

Everything's vine down at the Wizard of Wines! Chapter 12 is the nexus of nearly every plot hook in this book, but the wine won't flow until this gemless, ravenless, farm-to-table homestead is restored to its former glory. Too bad it's knee-deep in stick monsters and crazed, teetotaling druids. Remember, they're not dirty because they're evil; they're evil because they're dirty. In this episode: C...

It's a Dance Dance Execution at the door of this wizard tower. The wagon nearby is as volatile as a meth lab, and werewolves wait to finish off any survivors. Plus, we take another look at Strahd's potential enemies. In this episode: Chapter 11 (Van Richten's Tower, Khazan's backstory and tomb, Approaching the Tower, Khazan’s Spell Drain, Area's of the Tower V1-V7, Ezmeralda's Wagon, booby trap, d...

Sure, Strahd had one mother, but what about second mother? In Chapter 10, Baba Lysaga is a boy-mom wannabe, with a parasocial fixation on our titular vamp. To impress him, she wages a never-ending blood feud against Barovia's goat and raven populations. Adventurers are another matter. In this episode: Chapter 10 (The Ruins of Berez, the sad tale of Marina, Baba Lysaga backstory, Approaching the Ru...

For want of a dress, Krezk was lost. The Abbot gets serious about playing dress-up, Ireena takes a dive, fine feathered fiends guard the pass, and the roc just has the munchies. But the true villain, of course, is Sangzor, the gruffest goat on the mountain. In this episode: the second half of Chapter 8 and all of Chapter 9 (Areas of the Abbey S20-S24, Special Events, Something Old, Something New,...

Mutual aid! In my D&D? The Krezkites share everything: food, labor, and a growing horror at the screams emanating from the Abbey above. The empty graves strewn about town are almost as problematic as the portrayal of the people labeled "mongrelfolk" in this book. In this episode: the first half of Chapter 8 (The Village of Krezk, approaching Krezk first, Areas of Krezk S1-S5, Burgomaster Dmitri Kr...

Strahd may have tried to bury these gays, but they refused to stay down. In Chapter 7 we meet a goodly order of knights and their defeated dragon lord. What starts off as a side quest to lay unquiet dead to rest soon becomes a tragic love story that reaches across the centuries and literally brings light to this forsaken land. In this episode: Chapter 7 (Argynvostholt, The Order of the Silver Drag...

Dream Pastries™ are Pediatrically Delicious! Uhh, Tragically Suspicious? Chapter 6 of Curse of Strahd is a bigger deal than its page count lets on. Looks can be deceiving, but the hags don't bother with all that. What you see is what you get, and that's a whole lot of trouble. In this episode: Chapter 6 (Old Bonegrinder, night hags, hag covens, Areas O1 - O4, The Megaliths). Support us on Patreon...

Consider us Schick-pilled. We wrap up both our holiday hiatus and the 1979 TSR adventure White Plume Mountain in surprisingly high spirits: arms adorned with shiny new weapons, blood infected with instant super-tetanus, and bellies full of crab forearms. In this episode: Rooms 5-27, origin of I6 Ravenloft, Wave, Whelm, Blackrazor, just about the biggest giant crab anyone's ever seen, End Note, bac...

It's an old school holiday hiatus! We're tackling the first half of S2, the 1979 TSR adventure White Plume Mountain, written exactly one time (to his eternal chagrin) by Lawrence Schick. In this episode: publication history, front cover, map, Introduction, Dungeon Features, Wandering Monsters, Rooms 1-4. Support us on Patreon to hear monthly bonus episodes: https://www.patreon.com/CriticalLit Cont...

As we wrap up Chapter 5, all is not well in Vallaki! Never mind the devil cult hobbyists or the rampaging tiger. The coffin maker has six secrets buried in the attic, and they're waiting for a chance to feast. In this episode: The second half of Chapter 5 (Wachterhaus, Arasek Stockyard, Rictavio, Coffin Maker's Shop, Blinsky Toys, Town Square, Vistani Camp, Kasimir Velikov, Festival of the Blazing...

All will be well! Provided you avoid the murderous man with the barbed devil arm and his eerie collection of identical dolls. Or the incel wizard. The bone thief and his shovel. The priest with a secret. Gaze into the mirror and name your victim. Keep smiling, because you must. All will be well. In this episode: Chapter 5: The Town of Vallaki (pronunciation, maps, Vallaki Lore, St. Andral’s Church...

Castle Ravenloft Final Level: Exit here for Entombed Enemies, Plot Devices, Bat Guano, and Bridal Returns. Trust me, you don't want to talk to customer service. In this episode: Chapter 4 (Dungeons and Catacombs, Brazier Room, Crypts 1-40, Sergei's Tomb, Strahd's Tomb, Barov and Ravenovia's Tomb). Support us on Patreon to hear monthly bonus episodes: https://www.patreon.com/CriticalLit Contact us:...

A cape a day keeps the Dark Powers at bay! Never mind the young woman of indeterminate age in the King's Bedchamber. Just don't use the bathroom if you value your privacy—or sanity. In this episode: Chapter 4 (Treasury, Gertruda, capes, Spires of Ravenloft, Escher, Tower Peaks, Larders of Ill Omen, Kitchen, Cyrus Belview, Chamberlain's Office). Support us on Patreon to hear monthly bonus episodes:...

Now hiring at Castle Ravenloft! Feeling chained to your desk? Make it more than just a feeling, with a career that will last the rest of your life. Maybe even longer! In this episode: Chapter 4 (Main Floor, Chapel, Icon of Ravenloft, Heart of Sorrow, Lief Lipsiege, Wedding Cake, Study). Support us on Patreon to hear monthly bonus episodes: https://www.patreon.com/CriticalLit Contact us: Email: hug...

It turns out life (and unlife) at Castle Ravenloft is as zany as the town of Barovia is dour. Trade the gloomy mists for the crack of lightning, chanting witches, the clacking fingernails of crawling claws, and a bevy of rats, bats, cats and other killers. In this episode: Chapter 4 (Random Encounters, Blinsky toys, Ezmerelda d’Avenir, Rahadin, Poster Map, Walls of Ravenloft). Support us on Patreo...

It's 10pm in Barovia. Do you know where you children are? Strahd does, and he has plans for them. Or maybe the hags will get to them first. If only you could tear yourself away from these delicious meat pies. In this episode: all of Chapter 3 (The Village of Barovia, Blood of the Vine, Mad Mary, Ireena, Donavich & Doru). Support us on Patreon to hear monthly bonus episodes: https://www.patreon.com...

Only some listeners will be able to comprehend the mysteries laid bare in this episode. And only some of those will be compelled to pursue the eternal truth. The rest are condemned to a base existence, sated by the wit, humor, and dulcet tones of your hosts, never to glimpse the esoteric reality of the conversation. Do not pity them—ignorance is a reward of a kind. In this episode: Strahd as Gnost...

There once was a peasant named Vlad / Who felt neither happy nor sad / With no soul inside / T'wasn't grim when they died / Though the dirt nap did drive them quite mad. In this episode: Lay of the Land, Alterations to Magic, Resurrection Madness, the ramifications of soulless Barovians, Vistani lore, Random Encounters. Favorite Barovians: https://imgur.com/a/KPSYsTI Support us on Patreon to hear...

Curiosity gets the best of us, and any one of Strahd’s ploys would be enough to drag us into the prison plane of Ravenloft. But three out of five adventure hooks prefer Creeping Fog. Ask your GM if Creeping Fog is right for you. Side effects may include asphyxiation, exhaustion, and resurrection madness. In this episode: using the Tarokka deck, the portrayal of the Vistani, Adventure Hooks, Death...