Tony Santore

Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't

Science EN ↓ 297 episodes

Why do some plants grow where they do? How can geology cause new plant species to evolve? Why are some plants pollinated by flies, some by bats, some by birds, and others by bees? How does a plant evolve to look like a rock? How can destroying lawns soothe the soul? This is a show about plants and plant habitat through the lens of natural selection and ecology, with a side of neurotic ranting, light humor, occasional profanity, & the perpetual search for the filthiest taqueria bathroom. 

Be sure to visit the podcast's website and support the creator: www.spreaker.com

Author

Tony Santore

Category

Science

Podcast website

www.spreaker.com

Latest episode

Oct 4, 2026

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Episodes

Mosquito Traps & Burrowing "Toads" 30.03.2025

Rants about Mosquito Traps, Burrowing "toads" (Rhinophrynus dorsalis), Texas botanists' resistance to using scientific names, replacing windas, a new species of succulent bamboo from Laos, and more  I recommend the hell outta the Biogents Mosquito Trap, which is a pleasant way to reduce mosquito populations in your area using a compound that mimics the smell of human sweat, attracting mosquitos, t...

Trans-Pecos Botany with Dr Mike Powell 26.03.2025

Dr. Michael Powell is the curator of the Sul Ross Herbarium in Alpine, Texas and a proverbial wizard of West Texas Botany and Plants of the Trans-Pecos. In this episode we discuss  how the endangered species act influenced the wariness of Texas ranchers and land owners, the current drought that Texas is in, describing new species of plants, the rock-daisies and cliff-dwellers of the  Perityle clad...

The New Plant Species Discovered in a National Park 20.03.2025

Deb Manley is a naturalist and long-distance hiker who in March 2024 discovered a plant species that was entirely new to science:  Ovicula biradiata (Sunflower Family - Asteraceae). In this episode of Crime Pays we talk about the discovery, the unique flora of the Big Bend region, limestone deserts, the phenomenon of Sky Islands and more. Episodes of the  Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't  podcast are...

Neotropical Bamboos : What the &@#$ is Gregarious Monocarpy? 18.03.2025

Episodes of this podcast are available Ad-Free on the Patreon at : www.patreon.com/crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt Dr. Lynn Clark studies neotropical bamboos - bamboos from the Americas - specifically the genus Chusquea , which is highly diverse in Central & South America, from the Pine-Oak Forests of Western Mexico all the way down to the temperate rainforests of Southern Chile. In this episode we t...

Forest Restoration, Burning & Dam Removal 16.03.2025

Bruce Shoemaker is a researcher on natural resource conflicts and author of the book "Dead in the Water", about hydropower projects and extractive predatory capitalism in Southeast Asia. In this podcast we talk about turning monoculturres of pine plantations back into biodiverse forest in Northern California, the importance of fire in Northern California forests, as well as the completely disparat...

"The Living World" Rant & Orchid Pollination Biology 09.03.2025

In this episode we talk about why the word "nature" sucks; how to use the living world to avoid focusing on doom and idiocracy; why aimlessly walking along power line easements, irrigation ditches and railroad tracks in order to look at "weeds" is good for your health; an Australian orchid ( Rhizanthella gardneri)  that doesn't photosynthesize and blooms underground, a Vanilla species ( Vanilla ba...

Could Peyote Be An Endangered Species One Day? 07.03.2025

Ad-Free episodes of the Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't Podcast are available on the patreon at : https://www.patreon.com/c/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt In this episode we talk with Leo Mercado of Morningstar Conservancy, an Arizona-based peyote conservation and propagation organization formed by members of the Native American Church concerned with the increasingly diminishing wild popuations of Peyote,...

Chicago Museums, Welwitschia Diorama, Public Urination 05.03.2025

Rants about museums in Chicago, the hall of botany at the field museum, drop-in sinks, Euglossine bees, the genus Gnetum, getting the cops called on you at Chicago Botanical Gardens, the library at said institution, and more. Episodes of the Crime Pays Podcast are available for Ad-Free listening on the Patreon.

New Plant Discovered in West Texas, Neotropical Palms, & Panama Hats 26.02.2025

Episodes of the Crime Pays Podcast are available Ad-Free on the Patreon at : https://www.patreon.com/c/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt Rants about the New Asteraceae species discovered at Big Bend National Park, Ovicula biradiata, as well as an exploration of a few species of Neotropical Palms, potential musical choices for waterboarding at Guantanamo Bay and Divine Retribution against America in the for...

Guayusa Rants 20.02.2025

A 2 hour rant about the upper Amazon, the Paramo, ant symbiosis, Ilex guayusa , ethnobotany at the fruit market, giant neotropical bamboos, and much more.  Ad-free episodes of the podcast are available on the Crime Pays Patreon at : https://www.patreon.com/c/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt Thumbnail is a photograph of Miconia inobsepta and its swollen petioles acting as ant domatia.

Upper Amazon Fungi w/ Alan Rockefeller in Ecuador 10.02.2025

A conversation with mycologist Alan Rockefeller about fungal and plant biodiversity of the upper Amazon of Ecuador. Episodes of the Crime Pays podcast are available Ad-Free on the Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/c/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt

Atlas Nativa de Chile - Miquel Moya 29.01.2025

Miguel Moya is a naturalist and designer who produces field guides and posters for native plants in Chile. In this episode we talk about the sclerophyll forest, the temperate rainforests of Chile Island, indigenous communities in the Southern region, Araucaria forests, Gomortega kuele, Ancient Gondwanan disjunctions, Citronella mucronata, rare plants of the Santiago area and more. Ad-Free episodes...

Alerce Forests, Bog Tarantulas, & Arachnitis uniflora 25.01.2025

In this episode we talk about Alerce Forests, Ocelot Tarantulas that live in bogs in Temperate Rainforests, Why the Rosulate Form Makes sense in Alpine Habitats, and the extremely weird mycoheterotroph, Arachnitis uniflora. Ad-Free episodes of this podcast can be listened to on the Crime Pays Patreon at : www.patreon.com/crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt

Araucaria Forests of Chile 24.01.2025

Rants about the Araucaria forests of Nahuelbuta and Conguillo, Chile : Towering, 1200 year-old Araucaria araucana trees with an understory of Nothofagus pumilio, dombeyi and obliqua; thigmonastic, moving stamens in Loasa acanthifolia; Chusquea and new world bamboos; Mutisioid composites, biogeographyband plant distributions that are a result of both Gondwanan Breakup and amphitropical bird migrati...

Chilean Flora w/ Botanist Nico Lavandero 21.01.2025

Nico Lavandero is a Chilean Botanist who has described 8 new species of plants in Chile and is in the proc of describing many more. In this podcast we talk about a diversity of subjects, from Chile's 1974 Forest Law that incentivized the destruction of native forest for pine plantations, why plants take on dwarfed rosulate growth forms at high altitude in the Andes, Alerce forests, a growing aware...

Birdsong Landscapes 11.01.2025

Austin Miller runs Birdsong Landscapes, a native plant landscaping company and Natural History page based out of Southwest Ohio. In this episode we talk about continents as ecosystems, the natural history of Ohio, the Hopewell Culture and the Eastern Agirculture Complex, injecting native plant awareness into popular culture, lawn-killing, freshwater mussel diversity in Eastern North American river...

Potential Problems with Blight-Resistant Chestnuts 06.01.2025

For some background on the developing story of creating a blight-resistant American chestnut, please check out the podcast episode a few episodes back with Erik Carlson. Jared Westbrook is a geneticist with the American Chestnut Foundation. In this episode we talk about what went wrong with the initial round of trials for blight-resistant chestnuts, how to combine targeted genetic approaches to hy...

Better Living Through Reptiles 02.01.2025

In this episode we sit down with Kyle Elmore of the youtube channel @popmilk for a two hour talk about herping (lurking for reptiles and amphibians), creating habitat, passionately obsessing over milksnakes, why Indigo Snakes are so chill, self-education, embracing the living world as a side-hobby, coping with habitat loss, naming milk snakes,, the glory of tin, getting bit by copperheads, being a...

The Ruined Christmas Podcast 31.12.2024

Rants about ruining Christmas, disappointed family members, mixing and making soil recipes, Thornscrub Sanctuary update, maintaining a positive outlook despite the spiritually-poisonous effervescent fart of modern consumer society, feral pigs, ruderal plants, and more.  Before you whine about the ads, keep in mind all episodes of the podcast are available Ad-Free on the Crime Pays Patreon.

Dissecting the American Retail Slum 30.12.2024

In this episode we talk with Crime Pays Field Correspondent WIll Doran about his traumatic experiences in the Car and Retail Slums of the American Sunbelt, possibly one of the ugliest and most soul-crushing landscapes in the first world. This is a landscape that exists as pure "anti-culture", and as many of you may know, is the only kind of landscape and infrastructure option offered to many peopl...

Talking Philosophy with Kerry Knudsen 16.12.2024

Kerry Knudsen is a Lichen Biologist who originated outside of academia and worked in construction until becoming fascinated by the natural world and immersing himself in desert lichens. In this episode we talk about the modern human approach to the living world, why the study of natural sciences is becoming increasingly popular among people outside of academia, the biosphere as a living machine, s...

What Happened to the Transgenic American Chestnut? 11.12.2024

Here's your reminder that all episodes of the Crime Pays podcast are available ad-free (because ads are the equivalent of cold sores) on the Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/c/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt. What happened to the transgenic American Chestnut? In January of 2024 news broke out that a "lab error" had "compromised years of research" regarding the re-introduction of American Chestnuts into...

Mycorrhizal Harvesting, Sky Island Extirpations 10.12.2024

In this episode we talk about how we are explicitly NOT condoning it, how to harvest mycorrhizae from soil duff, what is "KNR" and what "IMO"s are, the paucity of study concerning mushroom diversity in the Davis Mountains and how some species there might be eventually extirpated due to the drying climate, the fungal genus Tarzetta, and more. The episode is polished off by a 40 question botany quiz...

Adam Black is NOT a Permaculture Activist 08.12.2024

In this episode I sit down withAdam Black about planting fruit trees in the park, how to save the honeybees, why invasive species don't exist, and how to properly apply a glue-on moustache and select proper attire so as to "fit in" when botanizing in West Texas. /s Adam Black is a field botanist and researcher with Bartlett Tree Research Laboratories and Arboretum who has traveled to numerous cont...

Native, Invasive & Basic Biogeography 05.12.2024

If the terrible Ads are bumming you out, then episodes are available on the Patreon Ad-Free at https://www.patreon.com/c/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt In this lecture we rant about Invasion Biology, Continents as Ecosystems, the concept of a "Living Machine", and David Bowie's package in The Labrynth. PDF download for this rant :  https://drive.google.com/file/d/1rL5WP8zI0-Oqh4DYkRFBpjk0tBrcP9Hl/view?u...

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