Confidence

So this was a very unexpected week to say the least. I saw the most attractive girl I've seen in years, didn't shoot my shot, and came home feeling like shit. I'll talk about why and the importance of taking the risk. This then leads into a story about an unexpected new connection that caught me off guard. It's crazy how the smallest moments can shine a light on your internal fears...

This is going to be a Dear Diary episode. A podcast journal of how I am feeling at my core. I've been in a mini funk, but somehow it's also the most peace I've felt in my life in a long time. The duality of it all ... Really what's happening is that I'm emotionally celibate, and that's brought me an enormous amount of clarity, but also this weird blank page feeling. I get h...

To be real, last week I hadn't been feeling my best. I care about showing up confident (and not looking weak), so I tend to mask those feelings. That's how our conversation starts. I get into detail about why I am the way I am. I'll walk you through how I grew up insecure and rebellious, all the way till now, and why I still deeply crave attention. I then shift gears to a situation sen...

The real work begins, not when you decide to leave, but directly after. It’s the weeks and days following that force you to face yourself and face your fears. Today, we are talking about getting back on your feet, leaving guilt and proving behind, and the real glow up post breakup. Maybe they are with someone new, maybe you are just determined to let go, today’s episode is a direct challenge to ta...

Why is it so hard to let go when you know something isn't right? Last episode I told you I ended my situationship, and this time it feels final. In this episode, I share how difficult it is to actually separate and how no contact gets harder before it gets easier. I start off with a question about not being ready to commit, and how I called Jay in a panic to "talk me off the ledge" w...

Something major is shifting in my love life. Today I am going to share with you a few personal stories, about letting go of a situationship, guilty feelings after a hookup, and ending old habits. Before that my friend asked me about the pettiest thing that gives me the ick, and if I get more icked out now that I am shifting to looking for love versus sex. I will discuss why people are dishonest in...

Is intense chemistry actually a bad thing? In today's episode, I'll share a listener's dilemma around this trending idea that chemistry doesn't matter at all. I break down what exactly chemistry and compatibility mean to me, and how they work in tandem with each other. I'll relate it to a client story about falling hard for someone despite massive red flags, and why anxious peo...

Why are you staying in that inconsistent relationship? Is it really because you have hope things will be different or is it actually because you have something to prove? I start today's episode by answering if it's "wrong" to reach out after being ghosted. I will then tackle two situations side-by-side about women who are in identical hot-and-cold multi-year situationships. I&#39...

Can you have a healthy relationship with someone who originally ghosted you? In this episode, I break down why ghosting creates such a lack of safety that it fucks the relationship up, and why people ghost in the first place. I answer two listener situations, one about a girl who got ghosted after three dates and can't stop wondering why he didn't reach out, and another about a guy who mig...

You can change, but really how much? In this episode, I share my vulnerable feelings about my current dating life, where I am, how I got here, and why I would describe myself as "serial monogamous without dating." I'll describe how I am doing the work to combat my avoidance, become more grounded, and set myself up for finding genuine love. I also unpack how much your upbringing impac...

When you treat a man well and you're consistent, they don't like you, but the ones you don't like are in love with you. What gives? This week, I break down dating's million-dollar question: Why are guys so interested in women who don't put in any effort? Is it attachment style or is it just how men are wired? I'll walk you through my full dissertation on the chase, value, a...

And just like that we are back baby. I went on my retreat, where I learned so much. I'll walk you through the whole experience, from being so down bad the week before I left (numbing myself hard), all the way through the cheese and mayo sandwiches we ate during the week, as well as the biggest takeaways I had. My view of myself is different. I feel enlightened, my energy has shifted, and I kno...

Quick heads up, but I will be gone next week for a 7-day consciousness retreat. In this episode, I talk about going through scarcity in both relationships and finances, stressed nights where I can't sleep, and a book someone sent me about the power of the subconscious mind. I'll talk about self-discovery and how to use your most important currency (attention) to further understand yourself...

What's more important your goals or your peace? Do you feel you can only have one or the other? Today I attack the difference between wanting and needing something, and the desire for success/relationships while still being grounded in the present. I also bought a DJ set I couldn't afford even with no end goal in sight. I answer listener questions about men not being intentional, hitting u...

You don’t just want a relationship … you want a relationship with someone attractive, with solid values, who can actually meet you where you are. If you want that type of love you need to have a level of confidence that lives up to the request. In this episode, I'll talk about why I feel more confident than I've ever have (despite worse external results). I’ll break down the difference bet...

I was definitely yelling a little bit this episode, but sometimes you guys like that shit. I share a lot of great nuggets about living in the now and understanding how our mental fantasies keep us trapped. I talk about my recent feelings of disconnection and how I processed those emotions to understand where I needed to take a risk. I'll break down why you need to stop asking questions and start m...

I used to feel so anxious and insecure. My life was filled with drama, but now I'm realizing it's hard to find many moments when I don't feel peace. In this episode, I'll talk about how every struggle in your life is self-inflicted, why drama isn't happening to you, and how to break free from the insecurity and anxiousness that is destroying your life. I'll address question...

In this episode, we're going to start surface level, and then we're going to get deep. I start by talking about leaving corporate life and never looking back, then I'll reflect on a question about what men learn when they sleep around a lot. Then we get into the hard stuff. Why do you feel lonely? Why do you feel like a burden? I'll talk about the deep work of eliminating lonelines...

What do you want? Not on the surface, I'm talking deep in your soul... In this episode, I'll talk about the uncomfortable introspection of being alone with yourself, how love is confused with attention, and what I believe love truly is. I'll talk about being honest with people even when it's hard, and how difficult it is to live in your truth. I answer listener questions about avoi...

She apologized for not texting me back, then didn't text me back at all. In this episode, I get into what happens when someone you're down for gets inconsistent and why your reaction to it matters more than theirs. I break down the exact regulation technique I use to calm down my nervous system. I also share a powerful client story about a woman who realized she's been using relationsh...

A girl didn't text me back for 12 hours, and my stomach dropped. In this episode, I get raw about the self-doubt that creeps in when I put myself out there, and why the smallest rejection can trigger the deepest fear. I break down how to actually feel your feelings instead of just thinking about them, why self-improvement is often driven by insecurity, and what scares me most about committing...

What happens when you're honest, vulnerable, and real... and still don't get what you want? Let's talk about showing up authentically and why it doesn't always work out the way you hope. I'll share two raw stories from my own life: getting stood up after putting myself out there, and ending things with someone I genuinely cared about because something just wasn't aligned. I...

I've been feeling different lately, at peace, confident, secure. Today, I will reflect on the reason I feel so present, and how you can too. I'll discuss how your desires, such as wanting a family, a relationship, and success, can hinder your happiness, but also your progress. Then I get into your questions: what to do when you’re feeling anxious over delayed texts, I'll discuss how to calm yourse...

Have you ever been surrounded by people (even in a relationship) and still felt alone? That’s because loneliness isn’t about being alone, it's what happens when your sense of self is tied to something outside of you … so when connection disappears, you feel like you disappear. In this episode, I break down why most people feel lonely, why we’re scared of it, and how a lot of us are way more co...

People think self-love is taking yourself on a date or going to the gym, but that's just the surface. In this episode, I share what true self-love is and how to practice it. I'll break down the difference between desire and attachment, and I'll go through the components of our emotions and how we project our feelings onto others instead of owning them ourselves. I share a specific exam...